Fic: My Damn Mouth
Title:My Damn Mouth
Fandom: Popular
Pairing: Sam/Brooke
Summary:AU. Mainly takes place in college were Sam is struggling with her feelings and Brrooke is having relationship issues. Can Sam help Brooke or will it be too late?
Rating: T(language and violence)
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters
Chapter Two:
2 Hour Earlier…..
It is the last night of summer before heading back to UCLA for my junior year of college. The parentals, mom and Mike wanted to have a family dinner before we got caught up in school work and jobs. So here sitting across from Brooke as she was talking about her job and summer classes that she was taking. I was pretending to not care even though I was paying attention to everything she was saying. The last time we spoke to each other it was not on the best of terms. A lot of hurtful things were said, some true others not. Over the years I became a better actress as my feelings for the blonde became more pronounced. I didn’t realize the feelings I had until Junior prom when Harrison was to pick one of us.
Sitting next to Brooke across from Harrison was unsettling as we waited for an answer. Praying silently that he would not choose Brooke, it is like the mantra in my head. Around the fifth time I froze my silent chanting realizing that I didn’t want him to pick me either. Wait I didn’t want to be chosen and I didn’t want Brooke to be chosen either. Here comes the migraine.
“Sam?” my name broke through the haze.
“Huh?” I responded out loud.
“I’m so sorry, Sam,” Brooke looked at me with sadness in her eyes.
What was she so sorry about? Oh. He picked Brooke as much as it hurt I was too confused by my discovery a minute before, that I’m pretty sure they thought I was in denial or shock. I was in shock but not for the reasons that they thought. I realized that they were looking at me like I was going to freak out at any second.
I stood up from the table “Well, you two enjoy the rest of your night I’m going to leave now.” I then walked away from the table.
I was so close to walking out the doors that I almost ran when I heard my name being called behind me. That could in reality be someone calling another Sam, so I kept moving forward. When a hand gently grabbed my arm stopping me did I finally turn around, it was Brooke.
“Sam I am sorry that this had to happen like this,” Brooke had a look of genuine sadness. “We’ve come along so far in our friendship I don’t want to lose that because of one guy.”
I could tell she was about to continue on with her rambling so I stopped her. “It’s fine Brooke, really. I wasn’t shock or upset that he picked you I froze because I realized that I didn’t want Harrison.” My confession left Brooke stunned. “It took me till now to realize that I did want Harrison as a boyfriend.” What I didn’t tell her is that I would have rather had her as a girlfriend, but this was not the right time and I was unsure of my feelings anyway. I could tell that she was waiting for an explanation so I gave her the most logical one that came to mind. “I thought I wanted Harrison but I was just afraid of losing his friendship because of him being with you. We have such a bipolar relationship that I didn’t want my best friend choosing you side if we,” I gestured between us. “have an explosive fight.”
I could tell she was buying the story and I was quite proud that I was able to come up with that explanation so quickly.
That was the first time I put my acting to the test. She gave me a hug and smile before returning back to Harrison and I left that night with me needing to sort through my feelings. Brooke and Harrison dated all through the summer and senior year. I wasn’t till the first semester of college, did things start to fade for them. They ended up breaking up right before Christmas realizing they were better as friends then boyfriend/girlfriend. Honestly that was my favorite Christmas present. I wasn’t delusional thinking that I could go after her now, but it did make me feel as if I had the tiniest chance of my dreams coming true.
My dream was squashed a few months later when she brought Carter to the family dinner. I didn’t like him once he walked it and no, it wasn’t because I was jealous, it was because something about him seemed off to me. He looked like a Ken doll, with the perfect blonde hair the well defined facial features and the compete fit body package. Physically he was a catch, but it was the little things like how he always made sure that Brooke was in his sights. At one point she got up to go to the restroom and he was about to follow her but seeing that he was having a conversation with Mike he stayed seated. For the few minutes she was gone he kept glancing in the direction she had gone and wasn’t paying attention to Mike at all. His whole body was tense until she returned.
To me that screams possessive, possessive in a bad way. Who wants a girlfriend or boyfriend who follows you everywhere? What’s that? Oh right, no one. The only reason someone should act that way around anyone else is if there is a murderer after them. Then you can worry, until then it’s just creepy. I’m still not sure that Brooke even realized how possessive he was, maybe she was in denial, or maybe she didn’t want ruin her “perfect” relationship. I love Brooke but sometimes she is so caught up in how people see her and that includes her boyfriends, that she misses out on all the good people and ends up dating all the wrong ones. Harrison was one of the better ones, but even he wasn’t perfect. He was still chasing after Brooke the girl from middle school, which didn’t fully exist anymore.
I wanted so badly to confront her that night about how controlling he was, but I couldn’t get her away from him long enough. I wasn’t the only one who noticed his behavior, Mike and my mother did also, but they fared the same with trying to confront the situation. I took me a month to figure out a way to talk to her about it. I tried to get her to meet me for coffee in between classes or going out some nights, but she either cancelled because she had plans with Carter or she would show up with Carter. Finally I found the perfect time. Sadly it was a year later and at the beginning of Spring semester of sophomore year. There was about an hour in which Brooke was in their apartment alone while Carter was out doing a research project.
I didn’t warn her I was coming, because I knew that Carter would find out and try to make it so he was there. I knew he didn’t like me and I’m pretty sure I heard him whisper to her that he thought I was a horrible influence. That was the last night I spoke to her and that was 6 months ago. Here she was talking about her summer and smiling away and all I could think about was our last interaction, which was something that kept the smile on my face fake.
I got to the apartment and was walking up to the door wondering what I was going to say to her to let me in when I saw her elderly neighbor Ms. Kramer struggling with her groceries and opening the door. I quickly moved to help her before she dropped a bag.
“Oh thank you!” Ms. Kramer spoke when she saw my hands grab the bag. She final looked at me. “Oh hi, Samantha!”
“Hello, Ms Kramer. Let me help you.” I grabbed the other bag from her grasp. “Lead the way.”
“Thank you so much dear,” We walked to her first floor apartment. “These days my arthritis is acting up and I can’t hardly grip anything right.” She then opened the door and ushered me in. “Just set it on the counter.”
“Do you need me to help with anything else?” I asked kindly even thought I hoped the answer would be no. I really needed to talk to Brooke before Carter got home.
“Oh no, thank you so much. Tell Brooke I say high.” Ms. Kramer stood by the door as I walked out into the hall.
“Will do. Have a good day.” I head for the stairs. Brooke’s apartment was just up a floor.
As I ascended the stairs I was trying to figure out how to bring up the subject knowing that it would probably turning into a yelling match. I stood in front of the door readying to knock. “To hell with it” I wasn’t about to beat around the bush.
I knocked on the door and waited. A voice answered from the other side as they drew nearer.
“Honey did you lock yourself out again. You should really keep you keys ne…”Brooke stopped talking once she saw that it was me at the door. “Hi Sam,” her face was perplexed. “I sorry did I forget plans?” Brooke frowned as she tried to remember if we had plans to me up.
“No, no we didn’t have plans. I just needed to talk with you about something important.” Brooke didn’t seem as if she was going to let me in. “Um, can I come in and talk?”
Brooke quickly moved to the side. “Yes, sorry of course you can come in.” I walked past her into her small living space. “Can I get you something to drink? I was just about to get a glass of water before you knocked.”
“No I’m fine.” I paced the room as she got herself a glass of water. A minute later she entered the living room with her glass and sat in an arm chair where it looked as if she had just been studying in previously, because there was a book open and balancing on the arm of the chair with a highlighter. I kept pacing and glancing at the pictures set around the room. She took a sip of her water before setting it down and breaking the silence and causing a pause in my stride.
“Sam what’s wrong.” Brooke sounded concerned.
I looked at her. Speak Sam. Tell her. My mouth wouldn’t open.
Brooke stood up and slowly approached me. “Sam you are scaring me, what’s wrong?”
I put my hand up singling her to stop. “It is nothing to be scared about, please sit.” She hesitated before lowering herself back into the arm chair. I started to pace again.
“You are going to wear a hole in the floor with all that pacing. Please sit.” I could tell Brooke was attempting at getting me to calm down. I didn’t stop until she said please again. I sat down but started to fidget with the pillow fringe.
I could feel Brooke staring at the side of my head, patiently waiting for me to start. I took a deep breath to calm down. This was already not going the way I hoped. I was afraid that she would shut me out for what I was about to say.
“I….Okay, please don’t interrupt me and let me say what I need to say, then you can yell at me at kick me out but please wait till you hear me out.” I looked at her waiting for her to agree.
She shook her head in agreement but her eyes were skeptical unsure where this was going.
“Okay.” I took another deep breath. “I understand that Carter is your boyfriend and as family I should be in support of your relationships and I know that a lot of our drama had to do with who we were dating, but I do not support your relationship with Carter.” I saw that she was about to speak and I could see some angry in her eyes. “Please let me finish. This is nothing to do with jealousy, this has to do with his controlling behavior over you. He is always with you the reason I didn’t tell you I was showing up today was because if I did Carter would either be here or convince you to meet up with him so that you would have to cancel plans with me. You can’t deny that. It happens anytime we try to get together. Mike and Jane, even though they haven’t said anything to you, agreed with me on this. We don’t think your relationship is good for you. You are a strong women who doesn’t need a man to define her or completely control everything she says or does. I don’t expect you to agree with me right now or maybe ever, but I just want you to take notice and maybe you’ll see what we have seen.” I paused. “Even though I don’t like Carter, it doesn’t mean that I won’t stop being there for you, but if you choose to get married to him in the future I will not be part of it. You deserve better, Brooke. I hope someday soon you will realize this.” Brooke looked like she wanted to tear my head off.
“Okay you can yell at me as I leave your apartment.” I stood up.
“I can’t believe you Sam! Carter loves me he is not controlling.” I stood still waiting for her to physically force me from the apartment. “Is it so hard to believe that we love spending so much time together? Oh I forgot, you haven’t had a relationship since high school and that one didn’t end well did it? Why the hell should I ever take relationship advice from someone who doesn’t do relationships!” Brooke was on a roll now. I knew it would be useless to stop her, so I let her rip me to shreds. I just hoped this was because she knew I was right and she felt as if she needed to defend her choices. “You definitely aren’t uptight enough not to be getting some. So are you more of the one night stand kind of girl. Fuck’em and Leave’em type? I bet you are, seeing that you haven’t ever mentioned seeing anyone.” Okay that hurt. Did she really believe that about me? I could feel tears forming in my eyes. Don’t you dare cry.
Brooke had stopped talking but was still fuming. I could tell she had more to say but before she could I turned away from her and headed for the door. Before I walked out I spoke still facing the door with my hand on the doorknob. I was hurt and I should have just left but I let my feeling towards her hurtful words show.
“Not that my relationship advise matters to you, but I do care about your happiness Brooke and I believe that you could be happier with someone else. But what do I know, I’m just someone who ‘fuck’s them and leaves them’, right?” I then left the apartment. That definitely was not how I wanted to leave it. I wish it would have ended with her telling me to leave.
Fandom: Popular
Pairing: Sam/Brooke
Summary:AU. Mainly takes place in college were Sam is struggling with her feelings and Brrooke is having relationship issues. Can Sam help Brooke or will it be too late?
Rating: T(language and violence)
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters
Chapter Two:
2 Hour Earlier…..
It is the last night of summer before heading back to UCLA for my junior year of college. The parentals, mom and Mike wanted to have a family dinner before we got caught up in school work and jobs. So here sitting across from Brooke as she was talking about her job and summer classes that she was taking. I was pretending to not care even though I was paying attention to everything she was saying. The last time we spoke to each other it was not on the best of terms. A lot of hurtful things were said, some true others not. Over the years I became a better actress as my feelings for the blonde became more pronounced. I didn’t realize the feelings I had until Junior prom when Harrison was to pick one of us.
Sitting next to Brooke across from Harrison was unsettling as we waited for an answer. Praying silently that he would not choose Brooke, it is like the mantra in my head. Around the fifth time I froze my silent chanting realizing that I didn’t want him to pick me either. Wait I didn’t want to be chosen and I didn’t want Brooke to be chosen either. Here comes the migraine.
“Sam?” my name broke through the haze.
“Huh?” I responded out loud.
“I’m so sorry, Sam,” Brooke looked at me with sadness in her eyes.
What was she so sorry about? Oh. He picked Brooke as much as it hurt I was too confused by my discovery a minute before, that I’m pretty sure they thought I was in denial or shock. I was in shock but not for the reasons that they thought. I realized that they were looking at me like I was going to freak out at any second.
I stood up from the table “Well, you two enjoy the rest of your night I’m going to leave now.” I then walked away from the table.
I was so close to walking out the doors that I almost ran when I heard my name being called behind me. That could in reality be someone calling another Sam, so I kept moving forward. When a hand gently grabbed my arm stopping me did I finally turn around, it was Brooke.
“Sam I am sorry that this had to happen like this,” Brooke had a look of genuine sadness. “We’ve come along so far in our friendship I don’t want to lose that because of one guy.”
I could tell she was about to continue on with her rambling so I stopped her. “It’s fine Brooke, really. I wasn’t shock or upset that he picked you I froze because I realized that I didn’t want Harrison.” My confession left Brooke stunned. “It took me till now to realize that I did want Harrison as a boyfriend.” What I didn’t tell her is that I would have rather had her as a girlfriend, but this was not the right time and I was unsure of my feelings anyway. I could tell that she was waiting for an explanation so I gave her the most logical one that came to mind. “I thought I wanted Harrison but I was just afraid of losing his friendship because of him being with you. We have such a bipolar relationship that I didn’t want my best friend choosing you side if we,” I gestured between us. “have an explosive fight.”
I could tell she was buying the story and I was quite proud that I was able to come up with that explanation so quickly.
That was the first time I put my acting to the test. She gave me a hug and smile before returning back to Harrison and I left that night with me needing to sort through my feelings. Brooke and Harrison dated all through the summer and senior year. I wasn’t till the first semester of college, did things start to fade for them. They ended up breaking up right before Christmas realizing they were better as friends then boyfriend/girlfriend. Honestly that was my favorite Christmas present. I wasn’t delusional thinking that I could go after her now, but it did make me feel as if I had the tiniest chance of my dreams coming true.
My dream was squashed a few months later when she brought Carter to the family dinner. I didn’t like him once he walked it and no, it wasn’t because I was jealous, it was because something about him seemed off to me. He looked like a Ken doll, with the perfect blonde hair the well defined facial features and the compete fit body package. Physically he was a catch, but it was the little things like how he always made sure that Brooke was in his sights. At one point she got up to go to the restroom and he was about to follow her but seeing that he was having a conversation with Mike he stayed seated. For the few minutes she was gone he kept glancing in the direction she had gone and wasn’t paying attention to Mike at all. His whole body was tense until she returned.
To me that screams possessive, possessive in a bad way. Who wants a girlfriend or boyfriend who follows you everywhere? What’s that? Oh right, no one. The only reason someone should act that way around anyone else is if there is a murderer after them. Then you can worry, until then it’s just creepy. I’m still not sure that Brooke even realized how possessive he was, maybe she was in denial, or maybe she didn’t want ruin her “perfect” relationship. I love Brooke but sometimes she is so caught up in how people see her and that includes her boyfriends, that she misses out on all the good people and ends up dating all the wrong ones. Harrison was one of the better ones, but even he wasn’t perfect. He was still chasing after Brooke the girl from middle school, which didn’t fully exist anymore.
I wanted so badly to confront her that night about how controlling he was, but I couldn’t get her away from him long enough. I wasn’t the only one who noticed his behavior, Mike and my mother did also, but they fared the same with trying to confront the situation. I took me a month to figure out a way to talk to her about it. I tried to get her to meet me for coffee in between classes or going out some nights, but she either cancelled because she had plans with Carter or she would show up with Carter. Finally I found the perfect time. Sadly it was a year later and at the beginning of Spring semester of sophomore year. There was about an hour in which Brooke was in their apartment alone while Carter was out doing a research project.
I didn’t warn her I was coming, because I knew that Carter would find out and try to make it so he was there. I knew he didn’t like me and I’m pretty sure I heard him whisper to her that he thought I was a horrible influence. That was the last night I spoke to her and that was 6 months ago. Here she was talking about her summer and smiling away and all I could think about was our last interaction, which was something that kept the smile on my face fake.
I got to the apartment and was walking up to the door wondering what I was going to say to her to let me in when I saw her elderly neighbor Ms. Kramer struggling with her groceries and opening the door. I quickly moved to help her before she dropped a bag.
“Oh thank you!” Ms. Kramer spoke when she saw my hands grab the bag. She final looked at me. “Oh hi, Samantha!”
“Hello, Ms Kramer. Let me help you.” I grabbed the other bag from her grasp. “Lead the way.”
“Thank you so much dear,” We walked to her first floor apartment. “These days my arthritis is acting up and I can’t hardly grip anything right.” She then opened the door and ushered me in. “Just set it on the counter.”
“Do you need me to help with anything else?” I asked kindly even thought I hoped the answer would be no. I really needed to talk to Brooke before Carter got home.
“Oh no, thank you so much. Tell Brooke I say high.” Ms. Kramer stood by the door as I walked out into the hall.
“Will do. Have a good day.” I head for the stairs. Brooke’s apartment was just up a floor.
As I ascended the stairs I was trying to figure out how to bring up the subject knowing that it would probably turning into a yelling match. I stood in front of the door readying to knock. “To hell with it” I wasn’t about to beat around the bush.
I knocked on the door and waited. A voice answered from the other side as they drew nearer.
“Honey did you lock yourself out again. You should really keep you keys ne…”Brooke stopped talking once she saw that it was me at the door. “Hi Sam,” her face was perplexed. “I sorry did I forget plans?” Brooke frowned as she tried to remember if we had plans to me up.
“No, no we didn’t have plans. I just needed to talk with you about something important.” Brooke didn’t seem as if she was going to let me in. “Um, can I come in and talk?”
Brooke quickly moved to the side. “Yes, sorry of course you can come in.” I walked past her into her small living space. “Can I get you something to drink? I was just about to get a glass of water before you knocked.”
“No I’m fine.” I paced the room as she got herself a glass of water. A minute later she entered the living room with her glass and sat in an arm chair where it looked as if she had just been studying in previously, because there was a book open and balancing on the arm of the chair with a highlighter. I kept pacing and glancing at the pictures set around the room. She took a sip of her water before setting it down and breaking the silence and causing a pause in my stride.
“Sam what’s wrong.” Brooke sounded concerned.
I looked at her. Speak Sam. Tell her. My mouth wouldn’t open.
Brooke stood up and slowly approached me. “Sam you are scaring me, what’s wrong?”
I put my hand up singling her to stop. “It is nothing to be scared about, please sit.” She hesitated before lowering herself back into the arm chair. I started to pace again.
“You are going to wear a hole in the floor with all that pacing. Please sit.” I could tell Brooke was attempting at getting me to calm down. I didn’t stop until she said please again. I sat down but started to fidget with the pillow fringe.
I could feel Brooke staring at the side of my head, patiently waiting for me to start. I took a deep breath to calm down. This was already not going the way I hoped. I was afraid that she would shut me out for what I was about to say.
“I….Okay, please don’t interrupt me and let me say what I need to say, then you can yell at me at kick me out but please wait till you hear me out.” I looked at her waiting for her to agree.
She shook her head in agreement but her eyes were skeptical unsure where this was going.
“Okay.” I took another deep breath. “I understand that Carter is your boyfriend and as family I should be in support of your relationships and I know that a lot of our drama had to do with who we were dating, but I do not support your relationship with Carter.” I saw that she was about to speak and I could see some angry in her eyes. “Please let me finish. This is nothing to do with jealousy, this has to do with his controlling behavior over you. He is always with you the reason I didn’t tell you I was showing up today was because if I did Carter would either be here or convince you to meet up with him so that you would have to cancel plans with me. You can’t deny that. It happens anytime we try to get together. Mike and Jane, even though they haven’t said anything to you, agreed with me on this. We don’t think your relationship is good for you. You are a strong women who doesn’t need a man to define her or completely control everything she says or does. I don’t expect you to agree with me right now or maybe ever, but I just want you to take notice and maybe you’ll see what we have seen.” I paused. “Even though I don’t like Carter, it doesn’t mean that I won’t stop being there for you, but if you choose to get married to him in the future I will not be part of it. You deserve better, Brooke. I hope someday soon you will realize this.” Brooke looked like she wanted to tear my head off.
“Okay you can yell at me as I leave your apartment.” I stood up.
“I can’t believe you Sam! Carter loves me he is not controlling.” I stood still waiting for her to physically force me from the apartment. “Is it so hard to believe that we love spending so much time together? Oh I forgot, you haven’t had a relationship since high school and that one didn’t end well did it? Why the hell should I ever take relationship advice from someone who doesn’t do relationships!” Brooke was on a roll now. I knew it would be useless to stop her, so I let her rip me to shreds. I just hoped this was because she knew I was right and she felt as if she needed to defend her choices. “You definitely aren’t uptight enough not to be getting some. So are you more of the one night stand kind of girl. Fuck’em and Leave’em type? I bet you are, seeing that you haven’t ever mentioned seeing anyone.” Okay that hurt. Did she really believe that about me? I could feel tears forming in my eyes. Don’t you dare cry.
Brooke had stopped talking but was still fuming. I could tell she had more to say but before she could I turned away from her and headed for the door. Before I walked out I spoke still facing the door with my hand on the doorknob. I was hurt and I should have just left but I let my feeling towards her hurtful words show.
“Not that my relationship advise matters to you, but I do care about your happiness Brooke and I believe that you could be happier with someone else. But what do I know, I’m just someone who ‘fuck’s them and leaves them’, right?” I then left the apartment. That definitely was not how I wanted to leave it. I wish it would have ended with her telling me to leave.