Sensual Red Lights- fan fiction- gazette/ alice nine/ d'espairsray-12/12

[sarcasm_chan]

Title:  Sensual Red Lights
author: Me..? Sarcasm_chan
warning: well, ...yaoi and vulgar language sometimes... english is not my mother-tongue..not beta-read
pairings: ShouxHiroto, SagaxShou, UruhaxReita, ReitaxUruha, RukixUruha, AoixUruha (beware of the one-sided ones)
disclaimers: unfortunately, their manager didn't want to sell them to me ;_; the meanie wants them for his own use -_-; so, i don't own them....
rating: - dunno NC17 is a bit overdone I think???
genre: manxman (a lot), drama
  Summary:
Uruha is a porn-star in the yaoi scene, his biggest rival is Ruki.

previous:(11)

12

“You hurt me for too long.
For too long I had mercy with you.”

’Where are you Reita? Why didn’t you come?’ Uruha wonders, the thoughts of Reita make him sad, but he can’t stop thinking about him.
Reita didn’t come. He just didn’t.
Instead, Uruha is now drinking coffee with Aoi…
Aoi, what is it with him, that makes Uruha feel so weird? So uncomfortable?
There is something special about that man.
Something mysterious, maybe even sinister…
But still…He is here. And Reita isn’t.
He is accompanying Uruha, on a moment he felt really lonely…
And he is quite good company…
’Maybe…Maybe I chose the wrong guy to fall in love with…’ Uruha thinks. But there’s still this thing about Aoi that makes him…
Suspicious.

”Why should I let you go? You deserve pain, you have always deserved it.”

Aoi smiles. He is here, with Uruha.
And nobody is going to spoil these moments of the two of them together. Nobody. Because Aoi made sure that is impossible.
Ruki is too busy, he is distracted.
Reita won’t come to interrupt.
Kai never understood, he never saw through Aoi’s plan.
And who else will ever try to?
No, Aoi just did it.
His master plan is finished. He reached his goals. At least, he is working on the final goal.
Everything turned out the way he hoped…Everything will progress the way he intends it too.
Ruki will be humiliated, Reita will be eliminated.
Aoi will stay the number one.
And Uruha will be his prize.

”Why should you be allowed to touch him?”

’What is it? What is it that makes me feel so uncomfortable about Aoi? What is it, which makes me feel nervous in his presence?
And not the kind of nerves I feel when Reita is around…
More the kind when you have to stand in front of class to do an oral exam…An exam you know you are going to fail for. And the teacher that takes off the exam is your most hated teacher, the one that will never let you pass.
Those nerves, I feel when Aoi is around.
I feel slightly scared, and intimidated. Maybe by his appearance and status.
Maybe cause he always looks at me with slight hunger in his eyes.
Maybe…Maybe because I am just paranoid.
This movie, my last movie in this scene, it exhausted me. If it continued longer I would have died…I would have broken.
And I still don’t know who my stalker is.
I still don’t know…
I only know, -no…I hope-, that now the movie has ended…The notes won’t come anymore. The bottles won’t be placed on my bed anymore.
That he’ll leave me alone…
But what if he doesn’t? What if he doesn’t stop?
He said he wanted to reach his goal…And I am that goal. And I am not…Not somebody’s. I am not with him.
…So he did not reach his goals yet…This nightmare…Is not over yet.
Why Reita, why did you leave me now? I really needed you…To distract me.
You lit me up.
You made me realize how much I actually wanted to get out of here…And now I have.
But you are not with me to celebrate it.
You are not with me, and you never will.
I guess I misjudged the situation…I guess I scared you. I know it went fast…But still.
I need you…I really do.
But you’re not here, and Aoi is.
Maybe I must take what I have…Maybe I must not hope for something impossible. Cause yes, it was kind of impossible. But it just felt so right when we talked…
And it doesn’t when I talk to Aoi.
But he is here. And I need someone who is here.
I am just too tired, to take this on my own any longer. I need someone who’ll be there.’

”Why should you be allowed to look at him?”

While time is passing, the two men are silently drinking their coffee.
Both drown in thoughts about each other, though not in a way they would expect from each other.
Aoi looks at Uruha over the edge of his cup, and sees how the other man is staring out of the window, his cup of coffee in his hand. He didn’t drink much from it yet, it probably is cold now, since he is sitting here for a while already, waiting for Reita, who’ll never come.
Aoi has of course noticed the sad expression on Uruha’s face; of course Aoi can guess who is in Uruha’s mind…
But he’ll make sure to make him disappear from Uruha’s mind, to make Uruha focus on pure and only him.
And he knows how to…He is a porn-star after all, he is the best flirter in the country probably. Or at least one of.
’You’ll be mine at the end of the evening.’ Aoi thinks, and a grin appears on his face.

”Why should you be allowed to talk to him?”

”What are you thinking of?” Aoi asks friendly.
Uruha looks up surprised. “Eh, - nothing.” He doesn’t sound very convincing.
Aoi laughs a bit. “I don’t believe you.”
”Oh…” Uruha adds a small smile. “Guess you caught me then.”
”I did,” Aoi grins. “So, tell me, who is on your mind?” A small spark in Aoi’s dark eyes tells Uruha what he is hoping for to hear.
Shall he say it? Just say it is Aoi he is thinking of?
It will have consequences, but it isn’t a lie. He is thinking of Aoi, but not in the way Aoi hopes.
”Hm, well…About several people actually.” Uruha says carefully. Saying something different will bring too much trouble, and Uruha isn’t in the need for trouble.
”Ah! I see.” Aoi grins. “And tell me, am I on the list?”
Uruha laughs. “Yes, you can say you are, yes.”
”Good.” Aoi smiles. His eyes are shining brighter than the sun, even if that one isn’t shining at all at the moment.
Uruha feels slightly intimidated, what does he have to do? Answer the flirting?
Well, he can at least try to get to know Aoi better.
”Well,” Uruha smiles then. “Tell me something about yourself?”

”Why should you be allowed to love him,
while I can’t and never will be able to?”

”Why should you be able to love him, while I can’t, and never will be able to?
Why? TELL ME WHY?” Ruki shouts.
Reita lies on the floor, he tastes blood, his body hurts more than it ever did, and the only thing he can feel is his heart beating from fear.
He has gone mad!
He always was mad but now he completely lost all control!
Reita is scared, scared as hell.
This is not like those times before when Ruki molested him; this is worse.
’He is going to kill me…’ Reita thinks terrified, while crawling to the door.
But Ruki places his foot on Reita’s back.
”No escaping, Reita. Not this time. You can’t flee. You can’t escape your punishment.”
Reita moans from pain, his hand is still reaching for the door, as Ruki punches the back of his head.
For a moment Reita can’t see anything, and a black hole swallows his sight, but then the showers are there again on his retina, and so is reality back in his mind.
He needs to get out of here…
He needs to find help…
He needs to fight back!
But he doesn’t have the strength.
”Uruha…” Reita softly groans, as he reaches for the phone in his pocket, but Ruki slaps it out of his hand.
”I DON’T THINK SO!” He shouts.
”Uruha…Help me…” And then Reita loses consciousness by another punch of Ruki…

As he opens his eyes again, Reita feels how Ruki grabs his head by his hair and lifts it up;
”Have a last wish?” He softly grins as he places the knife on Reita’s troth.

“You won’t even be able to think of him anymore!”

”I have to go to the bathroom.” Uruha smiles, after he and Aoi talked for a while.
”Go ahead!” Aoi smiles.
Uruha stands up and walks away, Aoi watches him.
He grins and stares out of the window, the feeling of victory is growing stronger with every second he spends in his presence.
They are talking, about their interests, their hobby’s their lives outside of their careers. The things they have in common, their friends.
Before the end of the evening, Uruha will fall for Aoi, if nothing goes wrong. And nothing will go wrong.
Cause what can?

”I’ll make you feel my pain!”

”L-Let me c-call U-Uruh-ha.”
”…NO WAY!”
”Y-You can’t declare my last w-wish.”
”You’ll be dead before he is here!” Ruki shouts, though his hand holding the knife is shaking.
”B-But I won’t t-tell h-him.”
“THEN WHAT WILL YOU TELL HIM?”
“I-I want t-to apo-poligise, f-for not coming.” Reita feels how tears burn, even crying hurts.
Ruki stares at him.
”I can’t declare your last wish…BUT AS SOON AS YOU EVEN DROP A WORD OF WHAT I AM DOING HERE, AS SOON AS YOU EVEN SHOW A SLIGHT AMOUNT OF FEAR…I’ll cut your troth.”
With his foot, Ruki shoves the mobile phone he slapped away earlier, into Reita’s direction.
”Make your voice sound normal.” Ruki says. “And hold it in a way I can hear it too.”

”The pain I endured for so many years, you will bear for a few hours. I don’t call that justice, but what is?”

The ring-tone was heard by Aoi, and he searched through Uruha’s pockets ‘till he found it.
He almost drops it as he sees the name on the display.
”Reita.”
’No…No that is impossible.’
But the phone keeps on vibrating and ringing the annoying melody of a pop-song.
Aoi stares at the display as if he saw water burn…
But then he pushes the red button; he cancelled the call.
”I don’t think so Reita…Uruha won’t save you. Nobody will.” Aoi grins evilly.
”…Why should he need to be saved?” A suspicious voice behind Aoi says.

”Why should you be able to love who you love, while I have to hate him?”

”Wait for me!” Saga laughs as Shou runs out of the building, looking over his shoulder and laughing.
”Hurry up!” He shouts. “Even if we have all night, I don’t have the patience!”
”I am coming, I am comi- Oh fuck.” Saga suddenly says.
Shou walks a bit closer, he still smiles. “What?”
”…I forgot my coat.”
“You don’t need a coat, I’ll keep you warm.” Shou grins and caresses Saga’s nose.
Saga smiles, but does shake his head.
”No, my…My keys and money are in it…And my cell-phone.”
 “Can’t we just drive to my place then?”
”…I meant my car-keys.” Saga says guilty.
Shou groans. “Okaay, go get it. I’ll be waiting here. But HURRY up!” He laughs.
”I’ll run faster than the wind.” Saga grins, while walking back into the building.
Shou smiles while watching him walk away, even if his penis is as hard as a rock, he’ll have patience.
Suddenly Shou jumps up from dismay, as he feels something shaking in his pocket.
’ Who’ll call me at this time..? Uruha is on his date…’ Shou thinks.
As he answers the call, he feels how the shock overwhelms him with every word sounding by the man at the other side of the line.
How…How could he be so stupid?
Why didn’t they ever think of him?

”I don’t think love is justified, I don’t think love is honest.”

Saga walks through the studio-building, into the direction of his dresser-room. He is sure his coat will be there.
He walks further as he suddenly hears a weird noise from a corridor on his left side.
Some angry voice shouting threatening and another voice moaning from pain…
That can’t be good!
Saga hurries to the corridor and sneaks against the door, putting his ear against it…
He feels how fear and shock take him over…
He needs to warn someone! And fast!

Shou hears how Uruha’s phone goes over and over, but he doesn’t answer…
”PICK UP!” Shou shouts desperate to his mobile.
Shou feels how panic takes him over…
What if…What if he followed Uruha? What if he hurt him?
And where is Saga?
While just wanting to call Uruha again, Shou’s own mobile phone starts ringing again.
”Hello?!” Shou says hasty.
”It’s me.” Saga softly whispers into it, but his whisper sounds just as panicked as Shou feels.
”Saga! Saga, we’re having a huge problem! I think Uruha is in danger!
Tsukasa just called me, the police-officer, he told me that he found out who his stalker is!
It’s Aoi Saga!
The evidence came from the lab and some anonymous guy tipped him-“
”I know Shou. That guy was me.” Saga says fast.
”WHA- WHY DIDN’T YOU-“
”No time for that now! Shou, Uruha isn’t the only one in danger!
Someone is being tortured in this building Shou! Someone’s LIFE is in danger! According to what I’ve heard, he has a knife on his troth Shou!”
”Wh-What?” Shou says shocked.
” They’re in the showers! I called the police… And Shou, Uruha is in danger for sure, since I believe he is with Aoi!”
”How do you-?”
”I found a note in Ruki’s dresser-room! It’s where I am now!”
”I don’t under-“
”THERE’S NO TIME SHOU! CALL THAT TSUKASA AND TELL HIM THE PLACE URUHA IS MOST LIKELY TO BE!” Saga shouts, even if he’s still whispering.
Shou knows why, Ruki’s dresser-room is very near to the showers…
”B-But what will you do-?”
”NO TIME SHOU! Don’t worry about me! NOW GO WARN THAT MAN!”
And Saga hung up.

”And you’re the one that stabbed my heart, with a knife in the form of your love for him.”

“…What are you doing with my phone?” Uruha asks suspiciously to Aoi.
”Eh…Well I heard it ring and I went looking for it, by the time I found it, it stopped, I guess I was too late answering the call…” Aoi shrugs, while adding a smile.
Uruha stares at him.
”I saw you cancelled the call, Aoi.”
”…That was by accident.” Aoi says quickly.
”Then why did you just say you were too late?”
”I- I didn’t want to- I don’t know, I didn’t want to make a fool out of myself in front of you…” Aoi shrugs.
”Why did you cancel Reita’s call Aoi?”
”Wh-What?”
”You heard me. And my earlier question. What do you know Aoi? WHERE is he? Why should he need to be saved?” Uruha starts shouting.
Aoi’s expression suddenly changes, from a small innocent smile, his expression changes into a cold one.
The lights in his eyes have disappeared, and suddenly, Uruha feels frightened. Who is that man?
”I always, ALWAYS, get what I want, Uruha.” Aoi slowly says.
And Uruha feels how a cold, iron fist, squeezes the air out of his lungs, and how his heart, mind and body freeze:
It is him.
Aoi, Aoi is his stalker.

”I’ll murder your body with the same knife you’ve murdered mine!”

”…Aoi, what will you do to me?” Uruha asks frightened as Aoi pushes him into the men’s bathroom.
”Nothing that will harm you Thunderthigh.” Aoi grins. “I won’t harm you, I won’t ever hurt you…But your little stand-in friend, that’s another story.”
”WHAT DID YOU DO TO HI-“Uruha shouts but Aoi puts his hand in front of Uruha’s mouth.
”Shush, Thrunderthigh. We don’t want anyone to interrupt, do we? Just relax, I’ll take good care of you…” Aoi whispers in Uruha’s ear.
Uruha feels how his body shivers as a reaction to Aoi coming that close; he doesn’t want this at all…
He hates Aoi, he really hates him. He is the one that caused him ALL this trouble!
”I didn’t do anything to the stand-in Uruha. I promise.” Aoi smiles. “But yes, I do know where he is.
And yes, I played a bit with you. But it was just so you wouldn’t defeat me Uruha! So you wouldn’t steal my position!
Though, you weren’t my biggest sorrow. You would have left anyway. You’re simply too good. Even I admit you are better than I am. And I never admit that.
You are just…Special.
And so thinks Ruki you know!” Aoi laughs.
A dangerous, hollow laugh, that makes Uruha shake even more.
Aoi slowly removes his hand from Uruha’s mouth and caresses his face with it.
”You didn’t know eh? You didn’t know our poor little dwarf is in love with you.” Aoi grins.
”But yes, he is. For such a long time already…Sad eh?
A jewel like you won’t ever fall for a gnome like him.”
Uruha is too frightened to scream. And they’re all alone in this small cold bathroom…
Uruha sees in the mirror across the wall, behind Aoi’s back, his own terrified face looking at him…
”And then…Then I decided to play a bit with you and him.
So I wrote that letter, yes. I didn’t mean it.
I wrote it, so you would think Ruki started intimidating you…And it worked.
You hated Ruki more and more, so he started acting worse and worse.
I didn’t mean to cause you the stress I did, I am sorry for that Thunderthigh, I really am…
But you weren’t acting the way I wanted.”
Aoi still whispers in Uruha’s ear.
”And then…Then I noticed the stand-in. I noticed how you looked at him, how Ruki hated him, how he acted and behaved.
He was an obstacle I did not foresee. I did not know how to catch your attention again, so I decided to find a way to get rid of him.
He is not worthy of you Uruha…”
Uruha feels anger spreading through his veins…
How does he dare…How does he dare to insult Reita like that!
How does he dare to claim Uruha like a prize!
But Uruha is still too scared…Way too scared.
This man is mad. Completely mad.
”Wh-What did you…Where is Reita?” Uruha softly asks.
Aoi grins. “Away. He won’t come back, don’t worry.”
”H-how?” Uruha asks, he can’t stop shuddering.
”I made Ruki deal with him.” Aoi grins.
”Wh-Why should Ruki-“
”Didn’t you know? I just told you he loves you. Well, it appears he couldn’t stand the “relation” between you and Reita.
It seemed he wanted to cause Reita more pain than anyone else in this world, I heard him shout something about making him endure the pain he endures his entire life…
I saw him rape him.” Aoi ends his sentence with a smirk on his face.
Uruha feels how his inside turns into ice.
”Reita…” he softly says.
”So, all I had to do was making Ruki more and more angry.” Aoi starts getting more excited, he is so proud of his plan and how it worked out. He can’t stop talking, and his eyes are shining again.
But this time, it’s a different shine. There is this glow of pure madness, which is even more terrifying than the cold expression he had on his face earlier.
”And now,” Aoi starts laughing maniacally. “I don’t think our little stand-in is still under us!”

Uruha needed a second to realize what Aoi just said…
What did he do…
”NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Uruha screams and then he pushes Aoi away with all the strength he has.
Aoi’s expression is surprised as he falls and slips on the wet, slippery floor of the bathroom.
His head falls against the edge of the sink, underneath the mirror…
Then, a loud but dull boom follows, as he hits the floor.

Uruha stands pushed against the wall, he is breathing heavily, and his heart is beating faster than it ever did before.
He stares in the eyes of his reflection, a terrified man looks back.
’What have I done...? “Uruha thinks, as he looks at Aoi’s body on the floor.
He didn’t move since he fell, his head is lying in a weird position, his mouth open and his eyes closed…
Is he…?
Can he be…?
Then the door of the bathroom opens, and Aoi’s arm, which fell against it, now falls on the floor of the café.
People are screaming, some men are shouting stuff…
But Uruha can’t hear it.
He does feel a hand on his shoulder.
He looks up, and sees how Shou looks at him with the most worried expression on his face…
Next to him, Tsukasa bows over Aoi’s body, feeling his wrist…But after a few seconds, he nods to Shou…
”He is not dead.”

”So, have any last words, Reita?”

Beep- beep- beep-
’What is this place? Where am I?’
Beep-beep-beep
’I feel pain…My chest hurts…And why can’t I move?’
Beep-beep-beep-
’Why am I having so much trouble with opening my eyes?’ he thinks. “Am I dreaming?”
”No.” A voice answers slowly, softly but though relieved. “You finally woke up.”
He opens his eyes, and sees the other.
”Your voice…” He softly groans.
Uruha nods and smiles.
”…I remember…” he says slowly. “…Ruki, he-“
Uruha puts a finger against his lips.
“Shhhht
It is okay. Everything is alright…
We were in time. Well, Saga was. And the police...
Ruki tried to stab you in your heart in panic, but he missed…You’re injury was very-
I thought you couldn’t-” His voice is shocking.
”I am so sorry…”He whispers then. “It was entirely my fault…”
But Reita, even if he almost can’t, shakes his head. “It is not. It is Zero…he turned Ruki crazy…It’s why I h-had so much…compassion with….him.” It takes a lot of effort for him to talk.
”Shhhht, don’t try to force yourself! Take rest!” Uruha whispers worried.
”Tell me what happened Uruha…” Reita softly asks.
Uruha takes a breath; he has to be strong now. Tell Reita the entire story…He needs to know.

Reita listened, he listened carefully, the look on his face is very painful, and not only because of the pain of his injury.
After Uruha stopped talking, a silence fell.
But now Reita speaks again:
”…What happened to-?”
”He is in jail. So are Aoi and Zero.” Uruha softly says, tears are almost falling from his eyes.
”Are they?” Reita softly asks.
”Yes, for molestation, blackmailing and trial to murder…”
He falls silent, and Uruha stays silent too. A few tears are falling from his cheeks.

”Uruha…” Reita slowly says then, and with all the strength he has he places his hand on Uruha’s hand, that lies on the white sheets of the hospital-bed...
“I am sorry I did not show up on our date…”

------
note: Thank you all for reading this! Really, thank you a lot! m(_ _)m the last chapter took me a while, but it is quite long ne?
I hope you all enjoyed reading my fic from begin till the end! ^--^v