phantom limb syndrome or...
is there such a thing as phantom heart syndrome? i still feel like you're there...but you're not. trying not to confuse the line between new and old. i didn't know it could be this difficult. but, i have found myself in a position i have never been...so i suppose i can't know what to expect. getting way too anxious and crazy. sometimes i wish i had a recorder in my head...because then i would write a book. trying to think of pretty words to say, but i'm running out... this is all turning out so ugly. i'd like to think i strive to surround myself with beautiful people, and i say beautiful because they have beautiful souls... yet i realized i led the ugliest i have ever met right to my door. i allowed this to happen... i just pray to God that i don't let it happen again. otherwise i've got some serious shit to work out. ha. had a weird thought that i should maybe write down so i can laugh later... your relationships only lasted as long as your cars. how fucking brilliant is that? too bad i got stuck with the unreliable. such is life...