Olly, olly oxen-free
Days of schoolbooks, nights of check-ins. Life right now is a bitch to schedule, but otherwise things are great.
Except I have little to no time for my firends these days. Except last night, which was fun-- tandoori chicken and Altered States.. chased down with Why We Fight and served with a splash of fine company. Delicious both in its perfection and its rarity: I find I appreciate my friends more if I see them less. But I am unhappy if I see them too little. A balance must be struck.
Sometimes I feel like these past few years have been nothing but a series of mad attempts to find balance. Perhaps that's just what people do their whole lives. Well, I, for one, feel suddenly peaceful--I feel as though I may just have finally found that balance. (Knock on every tree within a forty-five mile radius.) I worry a little about Austin, a little about scheduling things, a little about finances. But mostly I've moved into a positive paradigm that I am as yet unfamiliar with and therefore almost uncomfortable with. As though that makes any sense at all, right? Happiness, contentment, peace--I think perhaps these may be harder for we humans to cope with than trauma and tragedy. Letting yourself settle down into living instead of tackling one crisis after another...instead of creating crises where there simply are none--that is truly difficult. It's what we all want, but it's also fully insupportable. We live for the human drama.
But perhaps I'm learning something through all these stupid choices I've been making, because more and more I am content to be content.
That's what passes for an update, around here.
Kisses,
KT'
Except I have little to no time for my firends these days. Except last night, which was fun-- tandoori chicken and Altered States.. chased down with Why We Fight and served with a splash of fine company. Delicious both in its perfection and its rarity: I find I appreciate my friends more if I see them less. But I am unhappy if I see them too little. A balance must be struck.
Sometimes I feel like these past few years have been nothing but a series of mad attempts to find balance. Perhaps that's just what people do their whole lives. Well, I, for one, feel suddenly peaceful--I feel as though I may just have finally found that balance. (Knock on every tree within a forty-five mile radius.) I worry a little about Austin, a little about scheduling things, a little about finances. But mostly I've moved into a positive paradigm that I am as yet unfamiliar with and therefore almost uncomfortable with. As though that makes any sense at all, right? Happiness, contentment, peace--I think perhaps these may be harder for we humans to cope with than trauma and tragedy. Letting yourself settle down into living instead of tackling one crisis after another...instead of creating crises where there simply are none--that is truly difficult. It's what we all want, but it's also fully insupportable. We live for the human drama.
But perhaps I'm learning something through all these stupid choices I've been making, because more and more I am content to be content.
That's what passes for an update, around here.
Kisses,
KT'