how is your bleeding heart?
so...ive been thinking alot lately and i feel like right now in most of our lives, love seems to be one of the most important topics of conversation and importance. this is very understandable, but it also upsets me in a small way because why do have to define our worth and amount of attractiveness by what the opposite sex thinks of us. no matter what anyone says your friends can tell you how amazing and beautiful you are, but if a guy says something like that it takes on a whole new meaning. sometimes i think people take break ups harder then they take losing a friend. why is this? what happened to bros over hoes? arent your friends the ones who matter most, and when they tell you that you are fabulous, why is it hard to believe them. i know there are some people who give fake compliments but if the person saying it is a true friend then the compliment is most likely from the heart. and to be honest i think most of the compliments guys give are from their pants. i know how amazing is it to have someone, and how difficult it is to be alone, because i now feel its ten times harder being alone after having someone so special. but its like finding someone to be with is crucial. we are young! most of us are barely 20 and there are people worried about being alone. i want to shake them and say relationships are so much work. ITS LIKE HAVING A JOB. and granted you get sexual favors from this job once in a while. but why do we have to tie ourselves down and worry our butts off about getting with someone, finding a guy/girl to fulfill our us. i believe that most of my friends have the capability to be fulfilled without someone. personally i know that being with a guy only adds extra things to worry about. and yes i would like someone but why care. why put energy into caring about something that i know will change sooner or later. the only way id get someone right now is if i turned into a slut/started working the corners. and i think if anyone actually reads this and knows me thats not going to happen. things always work out, and more importantly they are always changing. who knows who you will meet tommorow. last night at the party the cute emo boy was there, and i told vanessa (reginas suitemate) and she said to me "so are you going to do anything about it?". i was impressed. its a good lesson too. take chances when you want to and dont worry about yesterday or tommorow. have fun with the people who love you. and one day there will be someone to go home to. but for now, play twister at 4 in the moring and drink cheap beer with your favorite people.