Well 17 more days
Yesterday we made my flight official. I am going to VA soon. I'm excited, but apart of me isn't. The part that isn't is the part where Kadyn can't go with me. I hate it! It's not even that really, its being so far away from him. If something were to happen i don't know what id do. IM so worried about that. Id never forgive myself for that. I am scared, and im worried, and im excited and im nervous all at the same time. Its like idk. I never have flown before ever, im scared of that....kadyn, my son my baby i love him sooo damn much and im just scared that something is going to happen to him. He is my everything, my world. IM his mommy....i dont think im ready to be so far away from him for so long. Anyways,,,
Im excited to see my boyfriend.
Another issue that we are going to come across...
Like future wise. I think about it alot, alot more than ishould, but im scared of the future, especailly with a LDR and a child whose father is very much envolved in his life. The fact is, i know i could never move out of MI, i know i could never move Kadyn anywhere without his father comeing along, thats the thing that worries me, but i guess we will cross that bridge when and if it ever comes.
Yes im not a very positive person when it comes to relationships, i mean, ive never been in a good relationship ever,. They started out good but ended sour. I've been physically abused, mentally, emotionally, verbably, everything, so i have my issues. I just can't get over them. But I do trust my SO now, like I have never trusted someone to fast, and now im scared because the what ifs are always going through my head. Like i dont know. I know i shouldnt think negatively but i cant help it. The good part is i have never met someone so amazing, someone who could make me fall so fast, and just compliment me all the time. I cant leave him ever. I can barely hang the phone up on him. Its going to be hard leaving him when i go see him but at the same time it will be easy because i have someone else to come home too...my son. So i dont know. We will see. im excited though
Not much to update though
Im excited to see my boyfriend.
Another issue that we are going to come across...
Like future wise. I think about it alot, alot more than ishould, but im scared of the future, especailly with a LDR and a child whose father is very much envolved in his life. The fact is, i know i could never move out of MI, i know i could never move Kadyn anywhere without his father comeing along, thats the thing that worries me, but i guess we will cross that bridge when and if it ever comes.
Yes im not a very positive person when it comes to relationships, i mean, ive never been in a good relationship ever,. They started out good but ended sour. I've been physically abused, mentally, emotionally, verbably, everything, so i have my issues. I just can't get over them. But I do trust my SO now, like I have never trusted someone to fast, and now im scared because the what ifs are always going through my head. Like i dont know. I know i shouldnt think negatively but i cant help it. The good part is i have never met someone so amazing, someone who could make me fall so fast, and just compliment me all the time. I cant leave him ever. I can barely hang the phone up on him. Its going to be hard leaving him when i go see him but at the same time it will be easy because i have someone else to come home too...my son. So i dont know. We will see. im excited though
Not much to update though