Okay, so yeah.
Sometimes I felt as if the world were some sort of horrible television show, centered around other people’s amusement towards my pathetic existance. As if everything were out to get me. Lately, everything that could go wrong, has gone wrong and honestly it’s more than one girl can take.
Dramatic, you say? Well I suppose, but let us take a look at what has been happening in the past two weeks alone.
For one, I moved out of my house to go live with my father due to my mother’s emotional abuse towards me.
Second, the only real person I know worth having feelings for likes someone else.
Third, somehow my favorite HIM sweatshirt was stolen despite the holes, rips on the sleeves from that time I hopped the fence at Wilson, and no real warmpth to it. Honestly, the thing is paper thin and the only purpose it serves me is being a comfort object. It’s sad, really, but when I’m in an awkward situation or I’m not comfortable in a room, I wear that sweatshirt and for some reason I feel better having that thin layer of fabric wrapped around me.
Forth, I am doubting my own ability to make decisions.
Fifth, I’m getting either annoyed or tired of every last one of my friends, for an abundance of reasons. I don’t feel like I can trust any of them and although I would still take a bullet for every one of them, I don’t think they would return the gesture. There are a few that have been annoying as shit since day one but I still hung out with them. Now, they're too annoying and immature to be around and I don’t really want to be friends with them anymore. Well, that’s probably not true. Maybe I just want to hang out with them less... in small doses I can deal with them I guess.
Did I mention my father’s house has no hot water and no computer? Yup. The computer I can live without, seeing as how the library is around the corner, but the hot water is really something people take for granted. I would literally kill for a nice hot shower these days...
Maybe I am being over-dramatic, but hey, you wouldn't be happy in my shoes either.
On top of it all, I think I'm doing poorly in school. I really want to do well in school this year, but I just have so many issues distracting me right now.
Eh, fuck em.
Oh, and trust me. There is way more going on than that. I just don't have a year out of my life to post it all here.
Dramatic, you say? Well I suppose, but let us take a look at what has been happening in the past two weeks alone.
For one, I moved out of my house to go live with my father due to my mother’s emotional abuse towards me.
Second, the only real person I know worth having feelings for likes someone else.
Third, somehow my favorite HIM sweatshirt was stolen despite the holes, rips on the sleeves from that time I hopped the fence at Wilson, and no real warmpth to it. Honestly, the thing is paper thin and the only purpose it serves me is being a comfort object. It’s sad, really, but when I’m in an awkward situation or I’m not comfortable in a room, I wear that sweatshirt and for some reason I feel better having that thin layer of fabric wrapped around me.
Forth, I am doubting my own ability to make decisions.
Fifth, I’m getting either annoyed or tired of every last one of my friends, for an abundance of reasons. I don’t feel like I can trust any of them and although I would still take a bullet for every one of them, I don’t think they would return the gesture. There are a few that have been annoying as shit since day one but I still hung out with them. Now, they're too annoying and immature to be around and I don’t really want to be friends with them anymore. Well, that’s probably not true. Maybe I just want to hang out with them less... in small doses I can deal with them I guess.
Did I mention my father’s house has no hot water and no computer? Yup. The computer I can live without, seeing as how the library is around the corner, but the hot water is really something people take for granted. I would literally kill for a nice hot shower these days...
Maybe I am being over-dramatic, but hey, you wouldn't be happy in my shoes either.
On top of it all, I think I'm doing poorly in school. I really want to do well in school this year, but I just have so many issues distracting me right now.
Eh, fuck em.
Oh, and trust me. There is way more going on than that. I just don't have a year out of my life to post it all here.