Probably the most hilarious thing I've read all week
This is what happens when you look at random blogs while avoiding biochemistry and organic chemistry...
There are no midgets in prison
By Shawn
Maybe there are no midgets in prison because they only commit little crimes.
I know what your thinking, "Of course there are midgets in prison.". All I can say in response to that is: prove it.
But if there are midgets in prison, do they have their own cell block? Do they walk through miniature steel corridors? Are the toilets and sinks set low to the ground? If not, then what? Do they just set the poor little guys loose into general population? It would be like some perverse and demented porno flick. I can almost hear the gentle sobs like a wounded Umpa Lumpa.
Umpa, Lumpa, Dumpity, Doo
Mad Dog likes rough sex and calls me Tattoo Etc... Etc...
Can you imagine those sad, miniature men in their tiny orange, child sized, jump suits? Defenseless, passed around for the gratification of the large, well muscled and very tattooed inmates. I mean really, their little heads are at waist level, that's just wrong.
How would a midget end up in prison? Are there midget wife beaters?
The guy comes home gets on his tip toes to look over the brim of the table. His face turns beat red with anger. That bitch wife of his made turkey when he was specifically thinking about steak. He climbs up onto the kitchen chair and sweeps his stubby little arms across the dinner table. "I hate this garbage you whore!" He screams in a squeaky munch ken like voice. The food she has prepared for the day tumbles to the floor in spray of creamed corn and sorrow. He stands before her on the kitchen chair and still they are not eye level. Later that night she is rushed to the emergency room. Her calves and thighs are bruised and swollen. "Who did this to you?" The Dr. asks. "I ran into a door." She replies with tears in her eyes.
What about midget bank robbers? The bank teller looks up only to see a stick up note and a gun being waved just above the counter. Maybe even the top of a little head.
I know this topic is a tiny bit taboo but I think we all need to think about it. I believe that there are no midgets in prison. But if there are, I beg you to get up right now and write your local congressman because these little guys need your help.
There are no midgets in prison
By Shawn
Maybe there are no midgets in prison because they only commit little crimes.
I know what your thinking, "Of course there are midgets in prison.". All I can say in response to that is: prove it.
But if there are midgets in prison, do they have their own cell block? Do they walk through miniature steel corridors? Are the toilets and sinks set low to the ground? If not, then what? Do they just set the poor little guys loose into general population? It would be like some perverse and demented porno flick. I can almost hear the gentle sobs like a wounded Umpa Lumpa.
Umpa, Lumpa, Dumpity, Doo
Mad Dog likes rough sex and calls me Tattoo Etc... Etc...
Can you imagine those sad, miniature men in their tiny orange, child sized, jump suits? Defenseless, passed around for the gratification of the large, well muscled and very tattooed inmates. I mean really, their little heads are at waist level, that's just wrong.
How would a midget end up in prison? Are there midget wife beaters?
The guy comes home gets on his tip toes to look over the brim of the table. His face turns beat red with anger. That bitch wife of his made turkey when he was specifically thinking about steak. He climbs up onto the kitchen chair and sweeps his stubby little arms across the dinner table. "I hate this garbage you whore!" He screams in a squeaky munch ken like voice. The food she has prepared for the day tumbles to the floor in spray of creamed corn and sorrow. He stands before her on the kitchen chair and still they are not eye level. Later that night she is rushed to the emergency room. Her calves and thighs are bruised and swollen. "Who did this to you?" The Dr. asks. "I ran into a door." She replies with tears in her eyes.
What about midget bank robbers? The bank teller looks up only to see a stick up note and a gun being waved just above the counter. Maybe even the top of a little head.
I know this topic is a tiny bit taboo but I think we all need to think about it. I believe that there are no midgets in prison. But if there are, I beg you to get up right now and write your local congressman because these little guys need your help.