"the tick tock of the clock is painful"
patience is what i need right now more than anything. i really can't wait to go to africa, yet i feel so unprepared. life is changing right before my eyes and i don't know which way to turn. every light is bright and shining straight in my eyes.
i feel more real than i ever have before at this point in my life. i think because i finally realized who i am in a lot of ways. even really bad parts of me, and i've realized that i truly don't care about what others think. truly, for the most part. i am who i am.
i'm so happy to be back in houston. my real dad is coming into town to visit tomorrow through sunday though so i will be pretty busy and then i am going out of town monday and tuesday. but...atleast i'm back, and i don't feel awkward and unwanted. i've decided that feeling unwanted is at the top of my "worst feelings in the world" list. either unwanted or just out of place. but not out of my comfort zone. that can be beneficial. this definitely was just out of place.
i'm going to go to bed.
i'm thinking of changing my entire layout again.
maybe sydney davis can help.
she seems amazing at that type of thing.
i feel more real than i ever have before at this point in my life. i think because i finally realized who i am in a lot of ways. even really bad parts of me, and i've realized that i truly don't care about what others think. truly, for the most part. i am who i am.
i'm so happy to be back in houston. my real dad is coming into town to visit tomorrow through sunday though so i will be pretty busy and then i am going out of town monday and tuesday. but...atleast i'm back, and i don't feel awkward and unwanted. i've decided that feeling unwanted is at the top of my "worst feelings in the world" list. either unwanted or just out of place. but not out of my comfort zone. that can be beneficial. this definitely was just out of place.
i'm going to go to bed.
i'm thinking of changing my entire layout again.
maybe sydney davis can help.
she seems amazing at that type of thing.