i dont even know
....ok, so im in this kinda good mood. but at the same time i feel like a huge part of myself is gone. like i feel ok, but just so empty at the same time. i just done even know what my deal is lol.
....i dont know how to make myself happy anymore. when im out with my friends im happy and have fun, like tn at mi hacienda lol~!* that was fun! and then leaf jumping lol,.... that was interesting lol. but then when i have some time to myself i dont know what to do. My mind starts going crazy, and i start thinking about all this crazy stuff, and then i just get upset and start to panic about everything. i dont even know why. school is going alright (grade wise), i love my friends, and even things at home arent as bad. dont get me wrong, its still shitty, but its improved slightly. and yet i still feel so......alone.
.....i know my journal has seemed real negative lately, and if you read it and dont know me then you prolly think im a really depressed person. lol but im not really. i have fun when im not home. but then when i come home, then yea......its pretty depressing. and also lately, i just feel like there is no point. so whatever.... life goes on.
....i dont know how to make myself happy anymore. when im out with my friends im happy and have fun, like tn at mi hacienda lol~!* that was fun! and then leaf jumping lol,.... that was interesting lol. but then when i have some time to myself i dont know what to do. My mind starts going crazy, and i start thinking about all this crazy stuff, and then i just get upset and start to panic about everything. i dont even know why. school is going alright (grade wise), i love my friends, and even things at home arent as bad. dont get me wrong, its still shitty, but its improved slightly. and yet i still feel so......alone.
.....i know my journal has seemed real negative lately, and if you read it and dont know me then you prolly think im a really depressed person. lol but im not really. i have fun when im not home. but then when i come home, then yea......its pretty depressing. and also lately, i just feel like there is no point. so whatever.... life goes on.