another sick day...
So this is the second sick day I've had between Thursday and today. That's a lot especially considering 1. I am never sick, unless I'm faking, and 2. my parents NEVER let me miss this much school. In a way I'm not complaining, but last night did suck. It consisted of my throwing up, going back to bed, waking up at 2:50 and being up till at least 4 throwing up. I finally threw up for the last time, got in the shower and ended up falling asleep in the shower. When I woke back up I felt good enough to go back to bed. I called Matt because I just needed to talk to him, I felt awful. And he stayed on the phone with me until I fell asleep, then woke me up so we could hang up and he could go to sleep. I don't know if he realizes how much that meant to me. It kind of made me love him even more, and then I spent part of last night crying because now I don't know if leaving for school is the right thing to do. I don't want to leave him, and I don't want to leave my friends. And if something like that does happen last night, I will be all alone. I don't know if I want that. And it will be hard because right now to make it easier for myself I'm just not thinking about it. And when Matt asked how I could do it, it's just that it's too difficult it I do think about it. But I know that because I don't think about it, it will make it REALLY hard for me when I leave. Even harder I bet than for him. He thinks it will be harder for him, but I don't think so. I really want him to come out with me when I go out there for orientation and stuff, but I don't want to make him go back with my parents (haha) plus he'll have his own stuff to do. Ok enough thinking about it. See, I just can't do it. But on a positive note, I feel OK enough to finally for real clean my room, get all my trash out, and do my laundry. Plus some HW which is good.