nobody uses lj anymore
so i've decided that i'm going to write more in this thing, for my personal enjoyment only. I'm starting to miss home again, I have a lot of good things here, great job, good people, good bf, but my entire family is there and all of my friends, i'm a cancer so i hold on to the past and have a hard time being away from people who are important to me. I thought it was hard enough being at cp for 6 months and i was only an hour an a half away. now i'm 5 hours away with no car, so its not like i can just get up and go home for the weekend, i have to make sure i have money for the bus and spend 8 hours on a sat just to go home and have to get right back on the bus on sunday at 7 in the morning, its like $80 just to spend a few hours at home. it sucks. nobody ever comes to visit me here, amanda has been the only one and shes not even from my home town shes from cp, my brother came once for a short overnight stay, we got drunk and it was fun, but it was so short :( i didnt want him to leave. so i've lived in MI since Nov, thats quite a few months and i have been home maybe 8 or 10 times, lets see about $80 for a round trip bus ticket lets mutiply $80 by 10...so i've spent how much money on bus tickets just to see everyone because i love them and i miss them, but nobody has come to see me and they give me a guilt trip when i cant make it home...that doesnt seem right...i'm sorry i'm not rich, i dont even have a working car anymore, mine has been dead for 2 months, dont have the money to fix it, but i spend money to go home. (this turned out to be a pity party for myself entry, oh well, i'm allowed) so i guess what i'm saying is that i miss home and everyone tells me to come back, but i cant leave my job here, its really great, i could make it a career here, i just wish it was closer to home, but why cant anyone make an effort to come see me once in a while, if they really miss me that much they would...i understand money is tight and its a long drive, but come on...if i can do it with paying rent and a million bills, they can do it.