past tense
i think i might have talked about this once before, like less than a year ago, but i might not have, but even if i had, it's taken on a different form now. it's about this; when i lived in the apartment on 4th street, i used to remember walking home all the time, from work or wherever, during the summer, and wishing that as i got closer i'd be able to make out Kate's car in front of the apartment. she was living in indiana that summer, and i always wanted her to have driven down randomly and parked and waited in the house to surprise me. obviously, that never happened, because well, she didn't give that much of a shit. which is cool, looking back on it, because she's dating a guy now who plays literally the shittiest music i've ever heard. you all know me, i'm pretty much a music whore and have no tastes outside of really bad rap or country, and can tolerate, hell, enjoy most things. i'm the guy who can switch from listening to ryan cabrerra to at the drive-in to straylight run and finish it all up with a resounding john michael montgomery. so i think you understand that this music is really bad. but she loves him, as she loves every guy she dates, and she must be happy, for now, as she is, so i won't talk more about it.
i've digressed beyond belief. the point was, now that abigail and i are, done i guess would be the word, again, i find myself wishing to come home and see her car parked outside my house. it happened once with her, back when we first started hanging out. i had gone to see Shakespeare in the Park(a Midsummer's Night Dream to be exact) and then gone drinking with a friend of mine, and when i got home, her cute little white honda civic was sitting there, and i went up the stairs and she was at the door waiting for me. that was one of the best moments of my life. it's those little dreams or hopes you have, that when they come true, make life awesome. obviously this hasn't happened again, but i still wish for it; maybe one day.
like kate, she too has found a new guy, mere moments after ripping my heart from its cozy manor of content. this wouldn't be much of a problem for me, outside the fact that i'm terribly emo, and therefore am either torturing myself about losing some girl, or pining after another one, except for the fact that from what i've been able to ascertain, she's going through the exact same steps with him that she did with me, which really makes me worry more for him than for me. she has long claws, this beast of love, and they are razor sharp and barbed, and i kid you not, they stay in longer than you would think possible and hurt more than they did the last time they found their way into your soft and supple soul.
i think the important part to remember, is that i really miss abigail a lot. she was tons of fun, and we really liked each other. i'd do anything to convince her. convince her of what you say? then you haven't been reading my journal long.
ahh, P.S. someone commented on my last entry with simply "(((noah)))" i'm not sure who that is, or what that was supposed to convey, or really anything. any help would be marvelous. thanks
i've digressed beyond belief. the point was, now that abigail and i are, done i guess would be the word, again, i find myself wishing to come home and see her car parked outside my house. it happened once with her, back when we first started hanging out. i had gone to see Shakespeare in the Park(a Midsummer's Night Dream to be exact) and then gone drinking with a friend of mine, and when i got home, her cute little white honda civic was sitting there, and i went up the stairs and she was at the door waiting for me. that was one of the best moments of my life. it's those little dreams or hopes you have, that when they come true, make life awesome. obviously this hasn't happened again, but i still wish for it; maybe one day.
like kate, she too has found a new guy, mere moments after ripping my heart from its cozy manor of content. this wouldn't be much of a problem for me, outside the fact that i'm terribly emo, and therefore am either torturing myself about losing some girl, or pining after another one, except for the fact that from what i've been able to ascertain, she's going through the exact same steps with him that she did with me, which really makes me worry more for him than for me. she has long claws, this beast of love, and they are razor sharp and barbed, and i kid you not, they stay in longer than you would think possible and hurt more than they did the last time they found their way into your soft and supple soul.
i think the important part to remember, is that i really miss abigail a lot. she was tons of fun, and we really liked each other. i'd do anything to convince her. convince her of what you say? then you haven't been reading my journal long.
ahh, P.S. someone commented on my last entry with simply "(((noah)))" i'm not sure who that is, or what that was supposed to convey, or really anything. any help would be marvelous. thanks