(no subject)
He always gets so mad at things you'd laugh at
"Don't get so worked up" you say
But on the back deck you admit that
you haven't felt much like laughing lately anyway.
hmm... in the mood to rant... so here i go.
first off... prom.
everyones making a huge deal out of it. I'll admit, I was too for a while.
but now I don't even know if i'm going to go.
and everytime i say that the reaction i get is =O! "YOU'RE NOT GOING TO YOUR SENIOR PROM!?!?!?!? YOU HAVE TO GO!!!"
the thing is, I've already been to TWO AMAZING proms. When I was a sophomore I went with will and had the time of my life. and when I was a junior I went with pat and had one of the most romantic and amazing nights of my life.
and this year, i have no idea who I'm going to go with.
I mean, yes, there are guys I could ask that are friends of mine
but theres no one that i'm like - wow, i definitely want to go with him.
And whats the point in spending all the money on the tickets and the limo and the dress and getting ready [granted, i already got a dress], if i'm going to have a mediocre time with mediocre person?
Idk, it really isnt that big of a deal to me if I don't go, I wish everyone else would stop making it seem like the end of the world if I don't go to my senior prom.
I've just been in kind of an unhappy mood lately in general, its hard to explain why.
Everythings been the same, everythings been boring.
I think I'm just ready for college and graduation already.
Only like 35 some-odd days left of high school =)
sometimes I get really sad about it, but most of the time I'm just ready to move on.
The truth is, I don't really feel very close to anyone at feehan anymore... so graduating and leaving them doesn't really affect me very much anymore. Maybe it would've like a year ago. But I spend all of my time with my friends at the salon or at tennessee's, or with lara and people outside of feehan.
And why are teachers still giving us work?
I haven't done anything in well over a month now.
I'm doing wicked bad in my classes and I couldn't care less about it.
Theres a lot of things missing from my life right now. And there are a lot of things I miss that used to be in my life.
And to be completely honest, there are things that are back in my life that are not good at all.
Maybe thats why I've been so unhappy.
i miss having -him- as a part of my life. (don't try to guess who the "him" is, you don't know)
anddddd thats the end of my rant for the moment. hopefully your life is going better than mine