Exit Interview
Dear Steve:
You said something about an exit interview. I just thought it would be easier to write you a letter, since you only want to have the exit interview when you get back from Ocean City (even though you pretend to everybody that you are never away), and I figured you would benefit from my fresh ideas.
I just wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed working for you. It's not every day one gets to interact with a business owner who wants you to get as much experience and exposure to the business world. It's much appreciated. Of course, I don't think all business owners refuse to hire black people, want to hire 'cute' women, or illegally dispose of asbestos after letting high-school age kids be exposed to it without their knowledge. I doubt all business owners lie to their insurance companies so that their crazy pyscho ex-employees get the exact same amount of money as they did before they went on unemployment. I doubt they adjust themselves in front of employees, or underpay their top managers and try to take away their bonuses once they have acheived their sales goals. I forgot something, haven't I? Oh wait, maybe it was the coke-filled (the white powdery kind, if there's any confusion) straw we found in the attache?
Yes, as you informed me the other day, our marketing sucks. Now why is that? Could it be that it ISN'T because I'm bad at what I do? Could it be that you would express a vague idea of what you wanted, I'd work really hard at something for a week, and then it would be the completely wrong thing from what you had in your mind but never expressed? Or could it be that you were too busy at the beach to answer faxes and emails? And when you did answer emails from your fancy schmancy blackberry, you left out vowels and consonants (sometimes in the same word) so we didn't understand what you were saying anyway. So thanks for always getting back to us so late that we miss deadlines and never get anything done. Or perhaps it's because I was a troublemaker and spent too much time arguing with you when you told me to do thing such as take copyrighted pictures for our commercial mailers, without paying, or using mailing list names for our own purposes after only obtaining the list on the condition we would not be sending out our own marketing stuff.
Thank you for setting such a high ethical and moral standard with your business that I am so completely disgusted with you and your company. This is the shadiest place I've ever worked. Some of the things that have gone on here are wrong, whether it's legally, morally or ethically.
Thank you for making me work with a guy who has no marketing experience, can't figure out anything on his own, and whose work I end up doing and re-doing. If you need any specific details on his incompetence, feel free to read my livejournal. Although, he has the same attitude towards women as you, so I can see why you two get along. Too bad he got the job cuz he's sleeping with your niece. or was.
Most of all, thank you for the pay, because besides your office manager, whom you underpay atrociously even though the other managers at your other stores make less profit for you, it is the only redeeming thing about this job.
I'm sure I have forgotten something. But that's where the term "etc and so forth" comes in.
Sincerely,
Sophia P. Harrison
You said something about an exit interview. I just thought it would be easier to write you a letter, since you only want to have the exit interview when you get back from Ocean City (even though you pretend to everybody that you are never away), and I figured you would benefit from my fresh ideas.
I just wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed working for you. It's not every day one gets to interact with a business owner who wants you to get as much experience and exposure to the business world. It's much appreciated. Of course, I don't think all business owners refuse to hire black people, want to hire 'cute' women, or illegally dispose of asbestos after letting high-school age kids be exposed to it without their knowledge. I doubt all business owners lie to their insurance companies so that their crazy pyscho ex-employees get the exact same amount of money as they did before they went on unemployment. I doubt they adjust themselves in front of employees, or underpay their top managers and try to take away their bonuses once they have acheived their sales goals. I forgot something, haven't I? Oh wait, maybe it was the coke-filled (the white powdery kind, if there's any confusion) straw we found in the attache?
Yes, as you informed me the other day, our marketing sucks. Now why is that? Could it be that it ISN'T because I'm bad at what I do? Could it be that you would express a vague idea of what you wanted, I'd work really hard at something for a week, and then it would be the completely wrong thing from what you had in your mind but never expressed? Or could it be that you were too busy at the beach to answer faxes and emails? And when you did answer emails from your fancy schmancy blackberry, you left out vowels and consonants (sometimes in the same word) so we didn't understand what you were saying anyway. So thanks for always getting back to us so late that we miss deadlines and never get anything done. Or perhaps it's because I was a troublemaker and spent too much time arguing with you when you told me to do thing such as take copyrighted pictures for our commercial mailers, without paying, or using mailing list names for our own purposes after only obtaining the list on the condition we would not be sending out our own marketing stuff.
Thank you for setting such a high ethical and moral standard with your business that I am so completely disgusted with you and your company. This is the shadiest place I've ever worked. Some of the things that have gone on here are wrong, whether it's legally, morally or ethically.
Thank you for making me work with a guy who has no marketing experience, can't figure out anything on his own, and whose work I end up doing and re-doing. If you need any specific details on his incompetence, feel free to read my livejournal. Although, he has the same attitude towards women as you, so I can see why you two get along. Too bad he got the job cuz he's sleeping with your niece. or was.
Most of all, thank you for the pay, because besides your office manager, whom you underpay atrociously even though the other managers at your other stores make less profit for you, it is the only redeeming thing about this job.
I'm sure I have forgotten something. But that's where the term "etc and so forth" comes in.
Sincerely,
Sophia P. Harrison