I'm annoyed.
So. This morning I got up super early so that I could get into the city and be at the AIF at 8am for my first aid practical. I get there and am cheerfully greeted by Kassie, Kobie, Rory and April saying "The St. John's people bailed on us. Go home."
Of course this was after they figured out who I was. They didn't recognise me from far away with my glasses on.
I already felt like crap. I did a movie afternoon with Casey and Caitlin yesterday (and I now have a new fandom as well! Anybody who has a chance to watch the series "Dead Like Me"? Watch it. It's seriously awesome) and I ate chocolate and drank Sprite. Which basically meant that my body went MOTHERFUCKERDIE! this morning and was trying to flush all the Sucrose and Lactose out of my system. Needless to say I felt pretty shocking. So I head off to the train station, Pop says he'll pick me up from the Thornlie train station when I ring him. I spend ten minutes walking around the bloody city looking for a toilet because my gut is growling worse than my dog does when the mailman comes by every day and I'm feeling all horrible and crampy and bloated. Then I get a msg from Tim "r u still in the city do you need a ride home". I msg back saying "no I'm fine, thanks though" as I FINALLY manage to find myself a bloody toilet. Seriously, it's the city - WHY COULDN'T I FIND ANY TOILETS? Dammit.
Anyways. Get on the train, ride back to Thornlie train station. When I got to Cannington I try ringing Nan and Pop. Evil preppy voice of doom says something about message bank. I figure I'll try again in a minute. I ring them about fifty time in the space of 45 minutes, 40 of which was spent loitering outside Thornlie station hopnig to God that a gang of bogans and/or Aborigine's (seriously, Thornlie baaaaad place, especially at night) didn't rock up and kick the fuck out of me for my spare change or something. I leave a message at Nan and Pops. FINALLY I give up and catch the bloody 883 bus down to the Langford shops. I'm about to get off the bus when mobile rings. It's Nan, freaking out because their phone wasn't ringing or something and they'd only just got my msg. I tell her I'm fine and walk home. Talk to Blair on phone, watch some Lost, do some screencaps and icons and stuff. Mum has a headache. So we go down to the local Zest Health and Fitness dooby so I can sign up for a gym membership (FINALLY). Lots of talking with lady called Jess - she's cool, much like other Jess's I know. Why are Jess's always cool? Wtf? Anyways. Go home, go on internet to talk to Blair. Mum takes me to craft night. I do some crafty stuff and mum and I make Nan's bed cause duh she just had a knee reconstruction and Pop's hands are too bent and gnarled from Athritis to tuck the sheets in properly. His hands are getting so much worse.
Anyways. Got home just now, came back on internet. Am downloading music and will post fanfic in a moment. Love the Lost fanfiction.
Title: Moment of Change
Rating: PG
Genre: flangst
Summary: Missing scene from The Greater Good. Claire’s reaction to Boone’s death. Charlie POV.
Disclaimer: Lost isn’t mine but it will be one day! ...Okay so I’m lying, I will never own Lost or anything relating to it but hey a girl can dream right?
Spoilers: Up to and including 1x20 Do No Harm and 1x21 The Greater Good
~*~
Once Claire was able to sit up properly he’d come over tentatively, grinning shyly, Jin trailing behind him. He wasn’t sure what to do or say, his hands were clenched around the fabric inside his pockets to hide his nervousness but his eyes were solely on her and her son. So he said the first thing that came to mind.
‘How you feeling love?’
Claire looked up, her eyes bright with tears and beamed at him, completely radiant in her own small moment of glory. Charlie felt his own face rearrange instantly into a returned smile. Some moments, some feelings just didn’t need words to describe them he thought blissfully as he knelt down beside her to have a look at the tiny yowling form in her arms.
Jin peered over Charlie’s shoulder, a proud smile on his face. He patted Charlie on the shoulder and then said something to Claire, which sounded encouraging before reaching out a tentative hand to gently brush the baby’s head with just the tips of his fingers before moving away swiftly, not wanting to intrude.
‘He must be hungry,’ Kate was practically weeping with relief. ‘Maybe you should try nursing him?’
And Charlie took this as his cue to leave.
When Kate, Charlie, Claire and her newborn finally emerged from the jungle the next morning, they were all completely exhausted but none of them could stop smiling. Jin had headed back to the caves to spread the word, but everyone seemed to know anyway, the beach was packed with people waiting for them, standing in shy clusters.
There were several minutes of happy smiles and of Claire simply standing there just beaming at everyone as they all exclaimed over the new arrival whilst Charlie stood awkwardly at her side, occasionally stealing a coveted glance at her and the tiny life she held so protectively in her arms.
It wasn’t until he glanced down the beach and saw Shannon disappearing into the jungle, Jack putting a hand on Sayid’s shoulder to hold him back, that he remembered Boone.
‘Hey do you know what happened to Boone?’ he whispered, grabbing Michaels elbow.
Michael looked up, his smile and laughter fading. ‘You mean you haven’t heard?’
Charlie stared at him. Did that mean...?
‘He died man,’ Michael dropped his voice. ‘Just this morning. Jack did everything he could but it just wasn’t enough. He was even gonna amputate his leg but Boone wouldn’t let him.’
‘He’s dead?’ Charlie echoed hollowly. He felt several different emotions flutter through him. Sadness. Guilt. Vaguely he realised that Kate had disappeared. ‘Why wouldn’t he let Jack take his leg? He might’ve been able to save him!’
‘Didn’t want him using up the antibiotics,’ Michael explained flatly. ‘And he was bleeding internally and stuff so…’ he paused for a moment, staring into space as he remembered and then shook himself a little. ‘Sorry man. It was pretty bad.’
‘What was pretty bad?’ Claire chipped into the conversation brightly. Charlie felt his stomach cinch. He didn’t want her to hear this - not now when she should be the happiest person alive. After all the horrible things that had happened to her, she should be able to just bask in her own little ray of happiness for a moment longer…
‘Nothing,’ he said quickly.
‘I heard something about Boone...’ Claire looked puzzled and then slightly perplexed. ‘Is he okay?’
‘Not really,’ Michael said grimly. ‘He’s dead.’
To Charlie’s utter dismay, Claire’s face fell and in an instant, her eyes had filled with tears. His hand moved automatically to support her as she rocked backwards slightly. ‘Oh my God!’
And to the horror of everybody present, both she and her baby began to cry.
~*~
‘Claire?’
Charlie hovered carefully at the entrance to the shelter lest she lash out at him but she was just sitting there cross-legged, still in the clothes she had been wearing throughout the labour, her baby bundled in her arms, with tears pouring uncontrollably down her face.
‘Hey,’ he came in a little further and touched her on the back but all this made her do was give a series of loud, gasping sobs. ‘Hey, it’s okay…’ Charlie was becoming increasingly panicky although he was working hard to conceal it. He hadn’t the faintest idea how to deal with a woman who was this bloody hormonal, but he tried to make his voice soothing and rubbed her back gently. ‘What’s wrong Claire?’
‘All I wanted was for Jack to be there to deliver the baby,’ she sobbed immediately and Charlie’s hand stilled on her back. ‘How could I even think such a selfish thing when he was trying to save a man from dying?’
‘You didn’t know that,’ Charlie said, at a loss at what he could say to comfort her. ‘You were in labour love, you were scared and you wanted a doctor there with you, helping you - and I can’t say I really blame you. I mean, Kate did a crack up job but it probably would have been a bit easier - you know, a bit less stressful for everyone if Jack had been there.’ After a moment Claire looked up at him, tears were still pooling, falling and Charlie couldn’t help noticing that even exhausted, postnatal and crying she still had a glow.
‘How am I ever meant to make it up to him?’
‘To who?’ Charlie’s brow furrowed. ‘Jack?’
‘No!’ Claire looked angry all of a sudden. Charlie drew back a little. ‘Boone!’
‘Erm…go to his funeral?’ Charlie suggested blankly and was surprised when Claire calmed down a little and gave him a watery smile.
‘You’re right,’ she laughed a little and pushed tears from her face with the heel of her palm. ‘I’m being silly. Of course I’ll go to the funeral…’ she glanced down at herself and frowned. ‘I’ll have to clean myself up a bit first though...’
‘Well how about I take him…’ Charlie gestured at her son. ‘And you can…’
‘Oh no,’ Claire stood up, still smiling waveringly. ‘No that’s not necessary Charlie. I mean, thank you for offering but I’ll be okay. I’ll just get into some clean clothes and I’ll meet you out on the beach in a few minutes okay?’
‘Okay...’ Charlie found himself being bustled outside the shelter a moment later feeling utterly bewildered and shaking his head to himself.
Sometimes he really did not understand women at all.
Of course this was after they figured out who I was. They didn't recognise me from far away with my glasses on.
I already felt like crap. I did a movie afternoon with Casey and Caitlin yesterday (and I now have a new fandom as well! Anybody who has a chance to watch the series "Dead Like Me"? Watch it. It's seriously awesome) and I ate chocolate and drank Sprite. Which basically meant that my body went MOTHERFUCKERDIE! this morning and was trying to flush all the Sucrose and Lactose out of my system. Needless to say I felt pretty shocking. So I head off to the train station, Pop says he'll pick me up from the Thornlie train station when I ring him. I spend ten minutes walking around the bloody city looking for a toilet because my gut is growling worse than my dog does when the mailman comes by every day and I'm feeling all horrible and crampy and bloated. Then I get a msg from Tim "r u still in the city do you need a ride home". I msg back saying "no I'm fine, thanks though" as I FINALLY manage to find myself a bloody toilet. Seriously, it's the city - WHY COULDN'T I FIND ANY TOILETS? Dammit.
Anyways. Get on the train, ride back to Thornlie train station. When I got to Cannington I try ringing Nan and Pop. Evil preppy voice of doom says something about message bank. I figure I'll try again in a minute. I ring them about fifty time in the space of 45 minutes, 40 of which was spent loitering outside Thornlie station hopnig to God that a gang of bogans and/or Aborigine's (seriously, Thornlie baaaaad place, especially at night) didn't rock up and kick the fuck out of me for my spare change or something. I leave a message at Nan and Pops. FINALLY I give up and catch the bloody 883 bus down to the Langford shops. I'm about to get off the bus when mobile rings. It's Nan, freaking out because their phone wasn't ringing or something and they'd only just got my msg. I tell her I'm fine and walk home. Talk to Blair on phone, watch some Lost, do some screencaps and icons and stuff. Mum has a headache. So we go down to the local Zest Health and Fitness dooby so I can sign up for a gym membership (FINALLY). Lots of talking with lady called Jess - she's cool, much like other Jess's I know. Why are Jess's always cool? Wtf? Anyways. Go home, go on internet to talk to Blair. Mum takes me to craft night. I do some crafty stuff and mum and I make Nan's bed cause duh she just had a knee reconstruction and Pop's hands are too bent and gnarled from Athritis to tuck the sheets in properly. His hands are getting so much worse.
Anyways. Got home just now, came back on internet. Am downloading music and will post fanfic in a moment. Love the Lost fanfiction.
Title: Moment of Change
Rating: PG
Genre: flangst
Summary: Missing scene from The Greater Good. Claire’s reaction to Boone’s death. Charlie POV.
Disclaimer: Lost isn’t mine but it will be one day! ...Okay so I’m lying, I will never own Lost or anything relating to it but hey a girl can dream right?
Spoilers: Up to and including 1x20 Do No Harm and 1x21 The Greater Good
~*~
Once Claire was able to sit up properly he’d come over tentatively, grinning shyly, Jin trailing behind him. He wasn’t sure what to do or say, his hands were clenched around the fabric inside his pockets to hide his nervousness but his eyes were solely on her and her son. So he said the first thing that came to mind.
‘How you feeling love?’
Claire looked up, her eyes bright with tears and beamed at him, completely radiant in her own small moment of glory. Charlie felt his own face rearrange instantly into a returned smile. Some moments, some feelings just didn’t need words to describe them he thought blissfully as he knelt down beside her to have a look at the tiny yowling form in her arms.
Jin peered over Charlie’s shoulder, a proud smile on his face. He patted Charlie on the shoulder and then said something to Claire, which sounded encouraging before reaching out a tentative hand to gently brush the baby’s head with just the tips of his fingers before moving away swiftly, not wanting to intrude.
‘He must be hungry,’ Kate was practically weeping with relief. ‘Maybe you should try nursing him?’
And Charlie took this as his cue to leave.
When Kate, Charlie, Claire and her newborn finally emerged from the jungle the next morning, they were all completely exhausted but none of them could stop smiling. Jin had headed back to the caves to spread the word, but everyone seemed to know anyway, the beach was packed with people waiting for them, standing in shy clusters.
There were several minutes of happy smiles and of Claire simply standing there just beaming at everyone as they all exclaimed over the new arrival whilst Charlie stood awkwardly at her side, occasionally stealing a coveted glance at her and the tiny life she held so protectively in her arms.
It wasn’t until he glanced down the beach and saw Shannon disappearing into the jungle, Jack putting a hand on Sayid’s shoulder to hold him back, that he remembered Boone.
‘Hey do you know what happened to Boone?’ he whispered, grabbing Michaels elbow.
Michael looked up, his smile and laughter fading. ‘You mean you haven’t heard?’
Charlie stared at him. Did that mean...?
‘He died man,’ Michael dropped his voice. ‘Just this morning. Jack did everything he could but it just wasn’t enough. He was even gonna amputate his leg but Boone wouldn’t let him.’
‘He’s dead?’ Charlie echoed hollowly. He felt several different emotions flutter through him. Sadness. Guilt. Vaguely he realised that Kate had disappeared. ‘Why wouldn’t he let Jack take his leg? He might’ve been able to save him!’
‘Didn’t want him using up the antibiotics,’ Michael explained flatly. ‘And he was bleeding internally and stuff so…’ he paused for a moment, staring into space as he remembered and then shook himself a little. ‘Sorry man. It was pretty bad.’
‘What was pretty bad?’ Claire chipped into the conversation brightly. Charlie felt his stomach cinch. He didn’t want her to hear this - not now when she should be the happiest person alive. After all the horrible things that had happened to her, she should be able to just bask in her own little ray of happiness for a moment longer…
‘Nothing,’ he said quickly.
‘I heard something about Boone...’ Claire looked puzzled and then slightly perplexed. ‘Is he okay?’
‘Not really,’ Michael said grimly. ‘He’s dead.’
To Charlie’s utter dismay, Claire’s face fell and in an instant, her eyes had filled with tears. His hand moved automatically to support her as she rocked backwards slightly. ‘Oh my God!’
And to the horror of everybody present, both she and her baby began to cry.
~*~
‘Claire?’
Charlie hovered carefully at the entrance to the shelter lest she lash out at him but she was just sitting there cross-legged, still in the clothes she had been wearing throughout the labour, her baby bundled in her arms, with tears pouring uncontrollably down her face.
‘Hey,’ he came in a little further and touched her on the back but all this made her do was give a series of loud, gasping sobs. ‘Hey, it’s okay…’ Charlie was becoming increasingly panicky although he was working hard to conceal it. He hadn’t the faintest idea how to deal with a woman who was this bloody hormonal, but he tried to make his voice soothing and rubbed her back gently. ‘What’s wrong Claire?’
‘All I wanted was for Jack to be there to deliver the baby,’ she sobbed immediately and Charlie’s hand stilled on her back. ‘How could I even think such a selfish thing when he was trying to save a man from dying?’
‘You didn’t know that,’ Charlie said, at a loss at what he could say to comfort her. ‘You were in labour love, you were scared and you wanted a doctor there with you, helping you - and I can’t say I really blame you. I mean, Kate did a crack up job but it probably would have been a bit easier - you know, a bit less stressful for everyone if Jack had been there.’ After a moment Claire looked up at him, tears were still pooling, falling and Charlie couldn’t help noticing that even exhausted, postnatal and crying she still had a glow.
‘How am I ever meant to make it up to him?’
‘To who?’ Charlie’s brow furrowed. ‘Jack?’
‘No!’ Claire looked angry all of a sudden. Charlie drew back a little. ‘Boone!’
‘Erm…go to his funeral?’ Charlie suggested blankly and was surprised when Claire calmed down a little and gave him a watery smile.
‘You’re right,’ she laughed a little and pushed tears from her face with the heel of her palm. ‘I’m being silly. Of course I’ll go to the funeral…’ she glanced down at herself and frowned. ‘I’ll have to clean myself up a bit first though...’
‘Well how about I take him…’ Charlie gestured at her son. ‘And you can…’
‘Oh no,’ Claire stood up, still smiling waveringly. ‘No that’s not necessary Charlie. I mean, thank you for offering but I’ll be okay. I’ll just get into some clean clothes and I’ll meet you out on the beach in a few minutes okay?’
‘Okay...’ Charlie found himself being bustled outside the shelter a moment later feeling utterly bewildered and shaking his head to himself.
Sometimes he really did not understand women at all.