In Search For
In Search For
He is the most wanted guy in the campus. He have the look, the money, and of course to complete the package the man. Then why is he here at a railway station wearing the shabbiest clothing he has in his ever- growing large wardrobe in his bedroom carrying a grey, worn out rucksack? In the inkiness of the night with cool air moving like a silent ballet, he is sitting on the wood bench with a slightly big grey hooded sweater shielding him from being viewed by the world. His deep hazel eyes glances at the dimly lighted railway track anticipating the wide eyes of the midnight train falling on him. His small, long fingers fiddling nervously crumpling and ironing his ticket out of pure anxiety. He removed his stare from the railway track eyeing his ticket.Busan:12.00a.m.The ticket exclaimed, he didn’t know from where he had the courage to step away from his shared apartment with his long-time boyfriend after the compulsory fight they had. How much time is it in this week alone? Ten? He lost count. They fought but not one of them could remember why they were fighting at the first place? His dam of tears already dried out long time ago. It wasn’t love anymore between them; it felt more like a torture with each passing day and by disappearing his doing a favour for both of them.
A shadow cast upon him. He turned to stare. The shadow was a young man around his age with large brown eyes, unruly black locks that flows endlessly; his skin was like roasted coffee must be due to outdoor activities and to support his hypothesis, the impressive bulk on his arm. The stranger is clad in a black sweater and a pair of faded jeans. It was something he emits that made Taemin felt secure, a feeling that he didn’t experience much these days and the least expected from a stranger, that he is so convinced he won’t die on the strong arms grasp. The stranger smiled genuinely and he returns it with a nervous smile. Judging from the lump on the stranger’s bag, they have something in common.
He was not the friendliest person in the world. And it took a lot for him to form a sentence that could lead to a conversation.
“Hey, where are you going?”He asked and came to realised it was the stupidest question he ever thought of.
“The same place that you are heading too.” The stranger smiled. It wasn’t the sarcastic smile that was usually plastered on by his so-called friends; it was the genuine smile that he rarely catches in people surrounding him. Why can’t be people be more like him? He thought solemnly.
“What’s your name?” He asked back curiously. The guy might be a stranger but it wouldn’t hurt to sound friendlier. After all, the stranger might be some random person that he won’t meet again after the train ride.
“Choi Minho.” The other said.
He was about to introduce himself to the stranger but he was stopped with a sudden hand gesture halting his next words.”Lee Taemin, right?”The stranger asked.
He blinked in a mixture of proud and paranoid. Proud that he was that popular and paranoid and enquiring whether the stranger is one his creepy fan-boys.
Understanding the curiosity of the younger one, the stranger quickly clear out the situation.”Don’t worry, I’m not a stalker.”The stranger said as if he’s a psychic with some wicked mind-reading power that just read his innermost thoughts. As if the stranger could read all the confusion written on his face, the stranger thus added.”We’re on the same campus, plus who’ wouldn’t know the infamous JongTae couple.”The stranger chuckled as confusion on his face erases in pure relief.”I ship JongTae couple.”The stranger added jokingly enlightening the cold night with roar of laughter.
“Well, for your information JongTae couple just broke up.”He said feeling a sudden freedom after being encaged so long with the title ‘Jonghyun’s boyfriend ‘on him.
The stranger named Minho realising the heaviness on his heart stood up and offered to warm them with hot chocolates. He nodded appreciatively as he rubbed his palm for temporal warmth.
11.30 p.m Still a long way to go, he silently prayed that Jonghyun wouldn’t realise the missing silhouette next to him leaving behind crumpled sheets until sunrise or assigning his father’s army to tear the town apart once he realised half of the wardrobe content is missing. The breeze was stirring harder that it had done earlier making him tremble; he pulled his coat closer to his body clutching it with a strong grip wishing the hot chocolates will come soon.
Soon, the stranger named Minho arrived with two polystyrene cup steaming with ghostly haze making him wonder whether it’s a cup of hot chocolate or a cup of wizard mysterious potion.
I’m back. Sorry, it took a long time.”The stranger named Minho sounded cheery for someone in cold night alone waiting for a train in Busan. He held a polystyrene cup in front of him and being excited for some borrowed heat; he grabbed it a little too eager and accidently grazing the stranger’s skin. The latter flinches and lament in pain.”I’m so sorry.”He said regretting for being a little excited child every time anything concern with chocolate is presented in front of him, it’s a reflex action for him. He tugged back the stranger’s sweater’s sleeve wanting to examine the injury his nails made, only to be exposed with fresh angry red mark along Minho’s hand. Taemin was in split whether to empathise for the pain Minho’s feeling or to shout at whoever did this.
Realising his hand were being the centre of his attention, the stranger quickly pulled back the sweater’s sleeve covering it.It was a little too late because he was bubbling with questions.
“Who did that to you?” The little one was turning boiling red with anger.
“Hey, it’s OK. Nothing serious.”The stranger attempted to pour some water by presenting a small smile to the current flaming state he is. Anyone who knows Lee Taemin will surrender on his grasp if his was curious and furious. Two state where Lee Taemin wouldn’t let go until he reached the bottom of it, especially if the two state fuses.
“No it's not OK at all, let me see if I can get my first-aid kit.”He muttered as he began rummaging his rucksack trying to act calmly as possible.
The stranger winces in pain as he wiped of the wound with disinfectant being as careful he can. The stranger smiled as he remembered how his late mother would do the same every time his father hit him.
“You know, you don’t need to worry because I’m running away from getting these wounds anyway.”The stranger winced again in pain as he put a sudden pressure on the wound.
“That’s great to hear. That makes the two of us.”He sarcastically said fingers skilfully covering the wound from further damage.
“Are you hurt anywhere? Did Jonghyun abuse you?”The stranger asked eyeing him from head to toe.
“You can say that. He abused my feelings. All done. ”He eyes the stranger waiting any response from him.
“Oh. Is he cheating on you or not enough love on the relationship or something? I’m sorry but I’m not really the one to give relationship advices.”The stranger truthfully said. Yes, he wasn’t the one that chase after girls, ever since his mother died; his life was dedicated to serving his father, trailing behind his older brother’s well-planned track.
He chuckled at Minho’s honesty.”Nope, too much love in the relationship.”He sarcastically added.
“Care to elaborate?”
“His friends are my friends. That means I can’t have my own friends. Dates are all at some lavish restaurant never once going to cinema like a typical couple. It was all about him, he never asked my opinion not once. In a word, he was the only one who was having fun.”He said nonchalantly because for him it felt like ancient history.
“Kinda like me and my dad. All the things my brother did I need to follow, even though I don’t want to. If I hesitate, well I got beat up. My home was a wreck since my mother died few years ago.”
“I’m sorry for your mother’s death.That’s why you’re running away from your house?”He shared his condolence,having a pair of healthy parents he never felt thinks or imagine one of his parents lying on the hospital bed.
“Yep, pretty much.Well,why are you running away,is it just because of Jonghyun?”The stranger asked him back.
“He is not the only reason I’m living.You see, I want to dance all my life freely,just like your case I have control-freaks for a parent and boyfriend.Well,what are going to do when the train arrived in Busan?”
“I don’t know. Live a little, work a little or maybe travel around. My mom once said; In order to know what you really want you have to try it all so I’ll experience whatever is out there. What about you?”
“I don’t know.”
“Hey, maybe we can stick together and find out what we want actually.”The stranger suggested smiling brightly for the sudden idea.
He nodded in agreement. Maybe it wouldn’t be a bad idea to travel with someone.
As soon their deal is sealed with approving smiles, the train pulled over blinking its large eyes on them. Both of them enters the train tossing for what the future holds once the train arrives in Busan.
Maybe just maybe he will be the one who waits until the wound on his body heals and the one who he builds his perfect home with.
Maybe just maybe the stranger would no longer be a stranger and will be the one holding his heart firmly.
He is the most wanted guy in the campus. He have the look, the money, and of course to complete the package the man. Then why is he here at a railway station wearing the shabbiest clothing he has in his ever- growing large wardrobe in his bedroom carrying a grey, worn out rucksack? In the inkiness of the night with cool air moving like a silent ballet, he is sitting on the wood bench with a slightly big grey hooded sweater shielding him from being viewed by the world. His deep hazel eyes glances at the dimly lighted railway track anticipating the wide eyes of the midnight train falling on him. His small, long fingers fiddling nervously crumpling and ironing his ticket out of pure anxiety. He removed his stare from the railway track eyeing his ticket.Busan:12.00a.m.The ticket exclaimed, he didn’t know from where he had the courage to step away from his shared apartment with his long-time boyfriend after the compulsory fight they had. How much time is it in this week alone? Ten? He lost count. They fought but not one of them could remember why they were fighting at the first place? His dam of tears already dried out long time ago. It wasn’t love anymore between them; it felt more like a torture with each passing day and by disappearing his doing a favour for both of them.
A shadow cast upon him. He turned to stare. The shadow was a young man around his age with large brown eyes, unruly black locks that flows endlessly; his skin was like roasted coffee must be due to outdoor activities and to support his hypothesis, the impressive bulk on his arm. The stranger is clad in a black sweater and a pair of faded jeans. It was something he emits that made Taemin felt secure, a feeling that he didn’t experience much these days and the least expected from a stranger, that he is so convinced he won’t die on the strong arms grasp. The stranger smiled genuinely and he returns it with a nervous smile. Judging from the lump on the stranger’s bag, they have something in common.
He was not the friendliest person in the world. And it took a lot for him to form a sentence that could lead to a conversation.
“Hey, where are you going?”He asked and came to realised it was the stupidest question he ever thought of.
“The same place that you are heading too.” The stranger smiled. It wasn’t the sarcastic smile that was usually plastered on by his so-called friends; it was the genuine smile that he rarely catches in people surrounding him. Why can’t be people be more like him? He thought solemnly.
“What’s your name?” He asked back curiously. The guy might be a stranger but it wouldn’t hurt to sound friendlier. After all, the stranger might be some random person that he won’t meet again after the train ride.
“Choi Minho.” The other said.
He was about to introduce himself to the stranger but he was stopped with a sudden hand gesture halting his next words.”Lee Taemin, right?”The stranger asked.
He blinked in a mixture of proud and paranoid. Proud that he was that popular and paranoid and enquiring whether the stranger is one his creepy fan-boys.
Understanding the curiosity of the younger one, the stranger quickly clear out the situation.”Don’t worry, I’m not a stalker.”The stranger said as if he’s a psychic with some wicked mind-reading power that just read his innermost thoughts. As if the stranger could read all the confusion written on his face, the stranger thus added.”We’re on the same campus, plus who’ wouldn’t know the infamous JongTae couple.”The stranger chuckled as confusion on his face erases in pure relief.”I ship JongTae couple.”The stranger added jokingly enlightening the cold night with roar of laughter.
“Well, for your information JongTae couple just broke up.”He said feeling a sudden freedom after being encaged so long with the title ‘Jonghyun’s boyfriend ‘on him.
The stranger named Minho realising the heaviness on his heart stood up and offered to warm them with hot chocolates. He nodded appreciatively as he rubbed his palm for temporal warmth.
11.30 p.m Still a long way to go, he silently prayed that Jonghyun wouldn’t realise the missing silhouette next to him leaving behind crumpled sheets until sunrise or assigning his father’s army to tear the town apart once he realised half of the wardrobe content is missing. The breeze was stirring harder that it had done earlier making him tremble; he pulled his coat closer to his body clutching it with a strong grip wishing the hot chocolates will come soon.
Soon, the stranger named Minho arrived with two polystyrene cup steaming with ghostly haze making him wonder whether it’s a cup of hot chocolate or a cup of wizard mysterious potion.
I’m back. Sorry, it took a long time.”The stranger named Minho sounded cheery for someone in cold night alone waiting for a train in Busan. He held a polystyrene cup in front of him and being excited for some borrowed heat; he grabbed it a little too eager and accidently grazing the stranger’s skin. The latter flinches and lament in pain.”I’m so sorry.”He said regretting for being a little excited child every time anything concern with chocolate is presented in front of him, it’s a reflex action for him. He tugged back the stranger’s sweater’s sleeve wanting to examine the injury his nails made, only to be exposed with fresh angry red mark along Minho’s hand. Taemin was in split whether to empathise for the pain Minho’s feeling or to shout at whoever did this.
Realising his hand were being the centre of his attention, the stranger quickly pulled back the sweater’s sleeve covering it.It was a little too late because he was bubbling with questions.
“Who did that to you?” The little one was turning boiling red with anger.
“Hey, it’s OK. Nothing serious.”The stranger attempted to pour some water by presenting a small smile to the current flaming state he is. Anyone who knows Lee Taemin will surrender on his grasp if his was curious and furious. Two state where Lee Taemin wouldn’t let go until he reached the bottom of it, especially if the two state fuses.
“No it's not OK at all, let me see if I can get my first-aid kit.”He muttered as he began rummaging his rucksack trying to act calmly as possible.
The stranger winces in pain as he wiped of the wound with disinfectant being as careful he can. The stranger smiled as he remembered how his late mother would do the same every time his father hit him.
“You know, you don’t need to worry because I’m running away from getting these wounds anyway.”The stranger winced again in pain as he put a sudden pressure on the wound.
“That’s great to hear. That makes the two of us.”He sarcastically said fingers skilfully covering the wound from further damage.
“Are you hurt anywhere? Did Jonghyun abuse you?”The stranger asked eyeing him from head to toe.
“You can say that. He abused my feelings. All done. ”He eyes the stranger waiting any response from him.
“Oh. Is he cheating on you or not enough love on the relationship or something? I’m sorry but I’m not really the one to give relationship advices.”The stranger truthfully said. Yes, he wasn’t the one that chase after girls, ever since his mother died; his life was dedicated to serving his father, trailing behind his older brother’s well-planned track.
He chuckled at Minho’s honesty.”Nope, too much love in the relationship.”He sarcastically added.
“Care to elaborate?”
“His friends are my friends. That means I can’t have my own friends. Dates are all at some lavish restaurant never once going to cinema like a typical couple. It was all about him, he never asked my opinion not once. In a word, he was the only one who was having fun.”He said nonchalantly because for him it felt like ancient history.
“Kinda like me and my dad. All the things my brother did I need to follow, even though I don’t want to. If I hesitate, well I got beat up. My home was a wreck since my mother died few years ago.”
“I’m sorry for your mother’s death.That’s why you’re running away from your house?”He shared his condolence,having a pair of healthy parents he never felt thinks or imagine one of his parents lying on the hospital bed.
“Yep, pretty much.Well,why are you running away,is it just because of Jonghyun?”The stranger asked him back.
“He is not the only reason I’m living.You see, I want to dance all my life freely,just like your case I have control-freaks for a parent and boyfriend.Well,what are going to do when the train arrived in Busan?”
“I don’t know. Live a little, work a little or maybe travel around. My mom once said; In order to know what you really want you have to try it all so I’ll experience whatever is out there. What about you?”
“I don’t know.”
“Hey, maybe we can stick together and find out what we want actually.”The stranger suggested smiling brightly for the sudden idea.
He nodded in agreement. Maybe it wouldn’t be a bad idea to travel with someone.
As soon their deal is sealed with approving smiles, the train pulled over blinking its large eyes on them. Both of them enters the train tossing for what the future holds once the train arrives in Busan.
Maybe just maybe he will be the one who waits until the wound on his body heals and the one who he builds his perfect home with.
Maybe just maybe the stranger would no longer be a stranger and will be the one holding his heart firmly.