(Untitled)

[sanspoof]

Last night I dreamed that we somehow found (at a thrift store?) a game console called the Wendy. It was maybe two-thirds the size of a ps2, similarly tall, and more square. It was a strange light yellow, not terribly saturated, and it had a smallish square transparent darker yellow window near the bottom right corner (about 2"x2"). This was

Comments

[squaracter]

It occurs to me that it would be a rather brilliant way to launch a line of homebrew retro-styled games by claiming to have made an emulator of a so-obscure-nobody-has-ever-heard-of-it system, and set up a webpage for "Wendy Nostalgia", with photos from some indeterminate period during the early 80s, with people all talking about the awesome experiences they had playing games with their Wendy when they were kids. And an incomplete list of system specs and fictional games to make it look legit:

Escape from Castle Hesselgren!
Splatter Rats!
Milkman Delivery Simulator!
Squinky and Pynchon's Wacky Adventure!
Filth Patrol!
Zyraxx II!
Shatner Bubbles!
Super Jet Commando!
Chomsky's Revenge!
Snake Beater Plus!
Decapede (arcade port)

and so on.

[squaracter]

Sneaky Peekers
Quorn-Fu: the Legend Continues
Jesper Hightail in Carpet World
Boil the Bastard (banned on Isle of Man)
Stupid Game
Mr. Tinkle's Town
Hobocop
Flimbo and Friends
Bitchin' Camaro
Pro Bengali Cricket Manager (1982 Season)
Wonky Wobbler
Rock N' Roll Rabbi
Chuggy Bear Learns Letters
Chuggy Bear Learns Numbers
Chuggy Bear Learns Differential Calculus

I'll stop now.

[sanspoof]

Eel Pie 1903!
Mitten Advantage!
Mustelid Maniac!
Stinking Desert Murray!
Gothic Lolita Lacey Date!
Mysterious Stabbin' in the Outback!
Booji Boy's Thanksgiving!
Back to School with Mr. Insensitive!
Evil Buttonface and the MonstroMoonMen!

Changing the topic

[diaryarena]

I think my favourite controller for the system was the "goblet" which measured how full it was and at what angle it was tilted at, used in the fight sequences in Moisture Quest Deluxe.

Re: Changing the topic

[squaracter]

Well, it was a damn sight better than the Mug Rack peripheral that was bundled with the Wendy at its release. You know, the color-coordinated plastic thing that only worked with one game (the shallow if endearingly scored "Mr. Zap's Exciting Cocoa") and was designed to break after a single play session. That sucker didn't survive Christmas morning in our household.

The Swedish venture capital firm responsible for the system disappeared without a trace shortly thereafter, so good luck finding a working one. I've seen a few people on the internet fashioning homemade versions of the Mug Rack out of sturdy wood and plexiglass. If you're not afraid of a little soldering you can make a USB-compatible one for use with modern PCs.

Re: Changing the topic

[sanspoof]

I remember never being able to get past level four, because my mom wouldn't let me hang any more of the good china on the rack. I tried hanging other similarly-weighted things on there to try to fool it into letting me advance, but it never worked.

Re: Changing the topic

[squaracter]

That's just as well really, as the game had an unwinnable 5th level... apparently a popular game design expedient in those days.

But the cocoa was so EXCITING! The load screen music still gets stuck in my head from time to time.