i give up
doubting about my friends....how worse can things get? Life is going in a downward spiral tighter and tighter closer to the bottom. I am realising things that i should have realised, feeling things i shouldnt be feeling....i doubt anyone reads these....o welll....i am giving up....i agreed to move out of cali with my granny in the next year. I am going to lose what i had here and try to get something new....i dont want to be Cessilee Ann Cadwallader the freak....not anymore.....I want to be Cessilee Ann Cadwallader the girl....I want to wear skirts and be a girl....i want to be able to cry without feeling stupid....I want to be what I really am....a 20 year old child at heart girl....o well....no one reads these so who cares....