woo
so, i worked out today.
i wish i could say the reasons were completely my own. i wish i really could.
sad thing is, last time i was home i could feel my mother's eyes upon me. sometimes she is so damn judgmental. she does such little things that really piss me off sometimes. over winter break, i went home a little slimmer than normal (perhaps maybe just more confident?). we were just hanging out like normal, i think i was watching a packers game, when out of no where she says "you look really good. i didnt want to say it at the time, but you were a little pudgy earlier." in this moment i could see why some girls have eating disorders. i was so enfuriated. i may not be perfect, but i know i am not overweight. i felt that same judgmental glare from her last week.
on the other hand, i really need to be more fit for rescue. i was so sore the day after doing a million chest compressions that i realized that i really really really needed to work out, because the amount of pain i was in was just unacceptable.
anyways, working out felt good. i really hope i can keep it up this time. for me.
i wish i could say the reasons were completely my own. i wish i really could.
sad thing is, last time i was home i could feel my mother's eyes upon me. sometimes she is so damn judgmental. she does such little things that really piss me off sometimes. over winter break, i went home a little slimmer than normal (perhaps maybe just more confident?). we were just hanging out like normal, i think i was watching a packers game, when out of no where she says "you look really good. i didnt want to say it at the time, but you were a little pudgy earlier." in this moment i could see why some girls have eating disorders. i was so enfuriated. i may not be perfect, but i know i am not overweight. i felt that same judgmental glare from her last week.
on the other hand, i really need to be more fit for rescue. i was so sore the day after doing a million chest compressions that i realized that i really really really needed to work out, because the amount of pain i was in was just unacceptable.
anyways, working out felt good. i really hope i can keep it up this time. for me.