sigh
i miss feeling free. i miss when i was younger: always flying on a swing, closer to the heavens...that moment of complete joy as you close your eyes and feel the wind pushing against your face. we spend our whole lives looking forward to being older and more "free", yet it is responsibility that inevitably binds us...the older we get, the more we become prisoners to everyday life. i will not be prisoner to the work, to the responsibility, to the pain anymore. in a world where it feels like everyone is against me, in a world where i hate myself, it is enough to realize that simple things make me happy and i love being alive.
it's been a hard week. from last friday when we all heard about the situation surrounding our dear frankie, to district choir without him, to rehearsal for the musical without him, choir without him, to the show itself... this void is immense, and deeply saddening. on top of this, i have had a never ending work load, and i have worked myself to torture. i dont sleep well, i'm always tired.
it has left me to find pleasure in the little things... sigh, just make it stop. i just want to be happy again.
forgive my rambling and self-loathing nature. it's been a hard week, and the next few weeks are not looking any better.
it's been a hard week. from last friday when we all heard about the situation surrounding our dear frankie, to district choir without him, to rehearsal for the musical without him, choir without him, to the show itself... this void is immense, and deeply saddening. on top of this, i have had a never ending work load, and i have worked myself to torture. i dont sleep well, i'm always tired.
it has left me to find pleasure in the little things... sigh, just make it stop. i just want to be happy again.
forgive my rambling and self-loathing nature. it's been a hard week, and the next few weeks are not looking any better.