Exempted
From your world.
- when I'm treated like an outsider everytime she says "family day"
- when I'm left out with your crazy plans with your endless MAs and I "can't be brought" or your BS of "bosses there, planning it"
- when you plan things with your family and friends and regardless of what we have (monthsary / me coming home / etc) you just prioritize plans with them. And no any effort to me. Worst part is, finding everything out last minute
- when you miss out details on me as though I live in a different country (i.e your sister and your new phone, your decisions on puppies which you can share to the dad's owner but to me only later, etc).
- when I'm supposed to attend your family thing and leave you off to "family meeting" on a Saturday night just because she said. And on Sundays it's clearly "family day", but what about Saturdays isn't that officially "our date night"?
- when you love talking so much in the crowd everyone is left mute. But worse part is, when you get so engaged talkative and all to them just how I missed you being with me, and me just being lost with that crowd given how you used to be.
I feel so extracted, exempted from your world. And I wish there's something to do about it except to leave because I feel like shit everyday talking to you, hoping today you'll be talkative to me, hoping today you'll not be a bore.. And everyday endless silence. Errands talk. Random hirits. Nothing of conversation.
And no matter what I attempt? You only react. You don't converse.
You belong to a crowd. Which is not where I want to be anymore. Not even with you. Because at the end of it, I'm only left out lost in that crowd. All the time.