We Were Happy, Weren't We?
Title: We Were Happy, Weren’t We?
Part: 6
Pairing: YeWon, minor!HanChul, tinybit!KyuMin
Rated: PG
Genre: angst, romance
Disclaimer: I own no one
Summery: a trip to jeju together.....changes things.
A/N: My apologies.....i have just taken on a second job and it's been keeping me busy during the day and extremly tired during the night.
Night falls and Yesung packs it in, smiling to himself about the great shots he had taken. It was certainly going to be added to his collection of photos on his bedroom wall. He got up after zipping his camera bag shut, brushing the sand on his pants off. When he bent down for his camera bag a larger hand had already grabbed the bag. Siwon swung the bag over his shoulders, stuck his hands in his pocket and walked towards the taxi he had hauled. Yesung looked dumbfounded before Siwon turned around calling out to him.
Somewhere along the short ride back to their hotel Yesung fell asleep. His head lolling about the back seat till it finally met with cold glass. Siwon, had been watching him from the corner of his eyes, wanting to know what could be hidden in the sleeping man’s mind. So many question ran through his mind like wind rushing by his face on a cold morning’s jog. But he didn’t dare ask them now, not in front of the taxi man, or the door man at the front of their hotel as he and Yesung slowly made their way into the hotel.
The older man is knocked out once his face hit’s the covers and he doesn’t bother to take his shoes off as he curls up on his bed. Siwon sets the camera bag down by Yesung’s suitcase. He debates if he should go and take the older man’s shoes off and tuck him in while his mind plays out what to do and how to do it. A couple of steps and he would have reached the other if not for the ringing and vibrating of said sleeping man’s phone in his pocket that woke him up.
Siwon ops for a cold shower to clear his mind while Yesung answers his phone.
‘oh Kyuhyun ah,’ said Yesung sleepily.
It wasn’t so much as Yesung saying Kyuhyun’s name that got Siwon to turn back around and stare at the man but rather the sleepiness of his voice. He must be exhausted, Siwon thought to himself before grabbing his towel and heads into the restroom.
****************************
‘I’m fine Kyu, I’m just tired…well I was getting some before you called…..I know, I got you some of those already…..my flight? Umm….at two so we should be arriving at three, why? You going to pick me up?’
Yesung giggled when Kyuhyun told him he didn’t want to waste time into picking Yesung up but he wanted his gift and that was the only reason why he was going to be at the airport at three to pick Yesung up.
‘he’s in the restroom why?…..Kyu ah, it’ll be rude not to give him a ride….’ arguing with Cho Kyuhyun was pointless and Yesung knows better not to, so instead he changes the subject, talking about how great of shots he got of the beach. Another minute of chit chat before Yesung hears Sungmin calling for Kyuhyun. ‘see ya tomorrow, my babe’s calling for me.’ Yesung chuckled, ‘bye kyu.’
After tapping the end button Yesung tosses his phone to the end of the bed, slips his shoes off and stretches. As he sat back down he listened to the running water of the showers, thinking about the past week spent with Siwon and how close they had become -or at least how close he had thought they would be from now on- ‘I guess your right, Kyuhyun ah. It’s time to let go.’ smiling sadly to himself, he got up to get ready for his shower.
*************************
Sleep had always been something that came easily to him, but that night, sleep had not come at all. He tossed and turned till he finally landed on his left side, eyes staring straight at Yesung’s small figure on the other bed, not too far from his. Siwon listened to the air rushing in and out of Yesung’s nose, watched as his stomach raised and fell in sync with the breaths he took.
It wasn’t until the first ray of sunlight hitting Yesung’s eyes and making him frown that Siwon realized he had been watching the other sleep all night long. But the surprising part of it all was that, he didn’t seem to mind. So, when Yesung finally opens his eyes and was a little surprised to see Siwon starring at him, all they did was smile at each other.
**************************
It had been a week since their return from their short mini vacation. Siwon was still trying to remember anything he could before he opened his eyes and Hangeng and Heechul where the first thing he saw. But it was all a blur and the more he thought about it the more it hurt. But he wanted answers. Answers as to why Yesung had a photo of the two them tuck safely inside his wallet.
“Siwon ah, Yesung got a promotion at work so we’re all going out to celebrate tonight.” Heechul informed Siwon who quickly hid the photo in his hands under his pillow. “are you taking a nap? Again?” Heechul asks, entering Siwon’s bedroom and watched as the other sat up in bed. “just a bit tired today, I guess.”
Heechil smiled, patting the younger’s head like a child. “don’t sleep too much. Don’t want you to get a headache alright?” said Heechul like a loving mother to her child. Siwon nods, he watched as Heechul closes his door shut. His gaze to brought to the view outside.
‘what is going on in my life, god. Answer me, give me a sign. Please.’
After few moments of hard thinking Siwon suddenly gets up, grabs his jacket and keys and heads out.
**************************
“uh, Yesung sshi?”
Said man hummed at his secretary, eyes still on the photos he had just taken the day before.
“there’s a man here to see you. He says he’s Mr. Kim?”
Yesung looks up, a little confused because really, Korea was filled with many Mr. Kim’s.
“he also said if you cant remember then to tell you about Jeju Island?”
“ah!” his eyes light up. “please let him in.”
As his secretary hurry on back to the front desk Yesung stand ups to fix his outfit. He took a deep breath, not sure why he was a little nervous.
“you’ve gotten so much cuter then when I saw you last.”
Yesung chuckled, “hello Kangin sshi, how was you flight here?”
Kangin smiled, biting his bottom lip before walked towards Yesung. “how about a hug first?”
Yesung giggled before leaning forward into big open arms.
“lunch?” Yesung asked when they pulled apart.
“certainly” Kangin answers with a bigger smile then the last one.
“sir,” Yesung’s secretary said as he Yesung and Kangin walks out of his office. “there was a man here looking for you.”
Yesung tilts his head, wondering who it could be. “why didn’t you send him in?”
“I told him that you were with a guest, he didn’t seem to mind and walked over to you office. I watched him stand in front of your open door for a few seconds before he stormed off.”
Yesung looked confused, he look at Kangin as if the answer was written on the other man’s forehead.
“um, should we cancel? I mean maybe it was a business meeting or something?”
The other shakes his head, “no, it’s fine. Come on, I know a really great place.”
***************************
‘what the hell is he doing here’ Siwon shouts in his head, driving pass speed limit. ‘and why the hell do I care who’s arms Yesnung sshi ends up in or not!’ thought Siwon. “dam it!” he screams, hitting the steering wheel.
Reaching for his phone when he stopped at a red light, Siwon called the only person who could possibly be the only one who could give him an explanation.
“Hangeng hyung, I need to talk to you.”
***************************
“where did you get this?” the Chinese man asked, examining the photo of a younger Siwon and Yesung.
“from Yesung sshi’s wallet. But the thing is, hyung. Why does he have this photo? And what is it that your keeping from me?”
Hangeng laughed, laying the photo back down on their coffee table. “what makes you think I’m keeping something from you ?”
Siwon arched a brow, not believing Hangeng. “you start your uncontrollable laughter.”
The Chinese man laughed again, “no I don’t.”
“you do it when your hiding something from Heechul hyung.”
The laughter has died down and Hangeng pouts, “I do not.”
“would you stop acting like a baby and tell me what the hell is going on here!?” Siwon demands, snatching the photo of him and Yesung from the coffee table and waving it in front of Hangeng. “I need answers! Not laughter or pouts!”
Hangeng huffed, “don’t blame me when you remember!” Hangeng shouts, pouting like a puppy that had just been kicked. He got up and walked into his and Heechul’s bedroom before coming back out with a laptop. “here, everything you knew before your surgery is in here….but, are you sure your ready for this?”
Siwon arching his brow once again, takes the laptop from Hangeng’s hands quickly, he starts the thing up.
‘yah! Are you sure you want to do that?!’
Siwon stares at the screen disbelieving. A pop-up flashing at him.
“don’t look at me like that! It wasn’t me who wrote that.” Hangeng defends himself, before turning his his head the left, offended at the ugly frown Siwon was sending his way.
Before he could click the only icon on the screen labeled ‘My Life Before’ the front door opens and in comes Heechul with a Sungmin tagging along behind him.
Heechul stops walking, raising an eyebrow in question. “what….are you two up to?” asked Heechul in a suspicious tone to which Hangeng looked away shaking his head and saying nothing as if he was the greatest liar ever. “you don’t want me to beat it out of you in front my guest now do you Mr. Geng sshi?”
The Chinese man pouts, “Hyung,” Siwon spoke up before Hangeng could answer.
“what?” Heechul asked, crossing his arms.
“not you Heechul hyung, I meant Sungmin hyung.”
The quiet man standing still behind Heechul widen his eyes, pointing to himself. “m-me?”
Siwon put the laptop to the side, standing up and walking towards Sungmin.
“why did Yesung sshi have this photo in his wallet?”
The photo was placed in front the shorter man who in return only sighed. “I told him to burn that.”
************************
“I hope you had fun Yesung sshi.” the nervous Kangin spoke as he waited for Yesung to unlock his apartment door. “is it okay I see you tomorrow?”
Yesung smiled, eyes disappearing as he did so. “I don’t see why not. And I had a great night Kangin sshi, thank you.”
The tall well built man smiled victoriously before Yesung watched Kangin walk into the elevator. He closed his front door, taking his shoes off and slumping down on the couch. Lunch was awkward, so awkward that Kangin had wanted to drag the date on longer then it should have. Yesung chuckled though when Kangin’s big goofy laughed popped up in his head. He could get use to those upside down half moon eyes of that big silly man. “it’s not like Siwon’s just going to show up on my door step and demand our relationship back.” Yesung spoke out loud.
It was like god had hard him.
A frantic knock on his front door brought him out of his Kangin daze. “who is it?” Yesung asked, not wanting to open it if it should be a stranger. “Hyung! It’s me! Sungminnie!”
Yesung wondered why Sungmin was shouting why the frantic knocking hadn’t stop. Slipping his slippers on he unlocks the door.
“Siwon sshi?” Yesung called, surprised at the tall man who was huffing at the moment from running up the flight of stairs, too impatient to wait for the dam elevator. ‘thank god, it looks like he ran up the stairs,’ thought Yesung, not wanting Siwon to see Kangin.
“is…is it true?” Siwon pants. Yesung looked confused, turning to Sungmin for an answer only to notice Heechul and Hangeng standing behind him. “um, why don’t you guys come inside.” Siwon rolled his eyes, impatient for an answer. Everyone is gather in his living room, he offered drinks but it seem no one was in the mood.
“tell me the truth, because I’m a little confused. If you knew of my surgery why didn’t you say anything?” Yesung sighed. “how much do you remember?”
“nothing, I just saw this photo and I’m a bit curious as to why you have a photo of me tucked away in your wallet.”
Another sighed escapes Yesung’s lips. He was so frustrated, so angry, so annoyed that he just wanted to take a knife and drive it straight into his chest so the pain would stop.
“I guess you never really even loved me enough to try and help me gain my memory back.”
“YAH CHOI SIWON!” Heechul shouts, angry at the younger’s lack of disrespect.
Yesung is breathing franticly, his heartbeat has picked up, the frustration building up in his chest was going to explode, one more blow from Siwon and Yesung’s heart would definitely explode.
“you were never even going to try and help me gain my memory back, were you?”
And that was all it took. Siwon’s words, like knives flying straight towards Yesung, the fragile Yesung that he once was came rushing back.
“you left me.” he finally spoke. Siwon raised a brow.
“you just…..up and left. No note, no phone calls……just….an empty hospital bed.”
“but you knew about my surgery when we met again at the bar.”
Tears streamed down Yesung’s face, because the fragile Yesung was back, because Siwon was the one accusing him of giving up on Siwon, and because his heart ached so much, the world had gone pitch black.
******************************
“did something upsetting happen?” the doctor asked Sungmin as he measured Yesung’s heart beat with his fingers and a watch. “a little.” Sungmin mumbled, feeling guilty that he spilled the the whole thing, well , parts of it out to Siwon.
“well it must have been upsetting, the blood in his body rushed up to his head all at once, which caused him to black out. Kind of like a person would after consuming a lot of alcohol. He should be fine in a few hours.” Sungming stood up, thanking the doctor before pouting at his pale face hyung.
“Sungmin ah,” Kyuhyun called from the door, sliding it shut once he was inside. “what happened?”
As Sungmin explained to Kyuhyun the situation the younger man grunted, feeling angry and wanting nothing more than to beat the living day lights out of Choi Siwon.
“don’t Kyuhyun ah, your just making this even harder on Hyung.” Sungmin pleaded, but Kyuhyun was too angry to even listen. He was out the door and ready to hunt down the man name Choi Siwon.
****************************
“you were out of line! You have no right to accuse him of giving up on you!” HEechul shouted, defending the man laying in the hospital.
“he knew! He knew I had surgery and he still didn’t try to help me remember!” Siwon argued back.
“that doesn’t give you the right to accuse him! Of anything! I don’t know why your so angry Choi when you were the one who wouldn’t tell Yesung ssho of your illness before you had your surgery!” screamed Heechul at the top of his lunges.
“stop it! Just stop it! Fighting isn’t going to solve anything!” Hangeng stood in the middle of his lover and his cousin. “we’re all grown men here so we’re all going to sit down and talk it out like grown men would.”
Heechul snarled at his lover’s words, turning around to leave. “I have nothing more to say to this fool.” A door is slammed and music could be heard coming from under the closed and possibly locked door.
“what the hell! We aren’t done here!” Siwon shouts, going for the closed door but was stopped by Hangeng. “chill, just chill Siwon ah. There’s no need for you to make the problem bigger then it already is.”
The younger glared at Hangeng. “open the files, maybe this would bring the understanding and gentle Siwon back.” mutter Hangeng before he walked over to the locked door, reaching up over the top of the door frame for a key and stepping inside the room to calm his lover down.
Siwon huffed, taking the laptop to the kitchen table. He clicked on the folder which opened up to him with video logs.
‘ahem….so, it’s I met someone today. His name is Kim Jongwoon, but he likes to be called Yesung. Heh, I think it suits him…..’ Siwon watched in awe at himself in the video. The Siwon in the video blushes and rubs the back of his neck as if too embarrassed to be making these video logs.
‘when he speaks….it’s…its magical…and when he sings, I can’t help but to fall in love with him…..am I being to forward? I mean I just met him today…it was like love at first site….no..it is love at first site. He’s wonderful and beautiful and….well, I have a date with him tonight. I better get ready, I don’t know what to wear and which cologne to use and oh god I’m so nervous. I haven’t been this nervous since…well, forever.’
The Siwon in the video inhale and exhale in excitement before smiling at the camera and shutting it off.
Siwon exit out of the first video log and clicked on the next.
‘I’m going to marry this guy.’ video Siwon spoke, sparks evidently in his eyes. That was all the video said before it ended.
It had been an hour now that Siwon had gone through the video logs and most of them, if not all, were about past Siwon’s life with Yesung. Their first kiss, first hug, first hand holding, first picture, first apartment, their one hundredth day together. It was all there. Then he finally got one that made him cringe at the saggy eyes on the video Siwon.
‘so uh..today we are going to go to the beach, Yesung’s wanted a picnic at the beach. It looks like rain out but…’ pass Siwon smiled biting his lips in happiness, ‘anything for my Yesung…..Yah! Choi Siwon!’
Siwon watched as video Siwon is tackled by an unbelievably young and handsome looking Yesung.
‘come on! You promised! No backing up!…hey what’s this? Haha Siwon ah what have you’ve been recording? Can I see?’
Present Siwon watched as past Siwon hugged Yesung from the back, tightening his hold and kissing his neck. ‘it’s nothing….are you sure you want to go to the beach today? Why don’t we just stay inside, I know something better we could do then the picnic..’
It was hard to watch himself be so in love with Yesung, how his smiled reached his ears and the spark in is eyes never died.
‘I can’t sleep…..the pain had gotten worse. Hangeng hyung’s boyfriend is going to perform an operation on me…..I…..don’t want him to go through this. I don’t want Yesung to have to go through taking care me in this situation……he doesn’t deserve to waste his time on me………heh..” video Siwon chuckles sadly. ‘they say there’s a fifty percent chance I’d make it out alive….but… what if the fifty percent chance that I don’t make it is bigger than the fifty percent chance that I will?’ video Siwon sighed, shaking his head and reaching up at the camera before everything went black.
Siwon sighed, suddenly remembering setting up a camera and on his a desk top in his and Yesung’s apartment. “our apartment?” Siwon spoke out. Shaking his head of any dizziness before clicking on the next video.
‘…….’ Siwon watched himself, sad and angry, sitting in a new chair, in a new background. ‘I want to be with him. Wonder if he stayed at the hospital long when he found out I had left…..why did it have to be this way…….ugh!’ pass Siwon growled in anger, he sighed after calming down. ‘today’s the last video log I guess….since it’s the day of my operation…..but if…if it’s me who just so happened to have made it out a live and is the person watching this video right now….I just….Choi Siwon, Kim Jongwoon….our Yesung means the world to us….he is the most loving and precious human being there could ever be. Find him, be with him even if we have to build up new memories and new courage to even build those memories again. I…we need him….and he needs us. I know Yesung, he’s so fragile and if I just happened to have come out of this operation victoriously then I don’t want to hurt him again. If I survived, let me be with him again….’ ‘Siwon ah,’ a voice called to video Siwon. ’it’s time.’
Blowing out air from his mouth video Siwon looked at the camera one last time. ‘Yesung ah, if it’s not me whose watching this and it’s you instead, know that I love you……so much…..’ past Siwon bit his quivering lips ‘I’m sorry I didn’t tell you….I didn’t want you to have to go through all this trauma….I love you Kim Jongwoon. I love you.’
Video Siwon reached up and the video came to a stop.
*******************************
A/N: idk when I’ll get to update again! Hopefully this weekend I can! I hope you all enjoyed it….I mean, it was crap but I still hope you liked it.
Part: 6
Pairing: YeWon, minor!HanChul, tinybit!KyuMin
Rated: PG
Genre: angst, romance
Disclaimer: I own no one
Summery: a trip to jeju together.....changes things.
A/N: My apologies.....i have just taken on a second job and it's been keeping me busy during the day and extremly tired during the night.
Night falls and Yesung packs it in, smiling to himself about the great shots he had taken. It was certainly going to be added to his collection of photos on his bedroom wall. He got up after zipping his camera bag shut, brushing the sand on his pants off. When he bent down for his camera bag a larger hand had already grabbed the bag. Siwon swung the bag over his shoulders, stuck his hands in his pocket and walked towards the taxi he had hauled. Yesung looked dumbfounded before Siwon turned around calling out to him.
Somewhere along the short ride back to their hotel Yesung fell asleep. His head lolling about the back seat till it finally met with cold glass. Siwon, had been watching him from the corner of his eyes, wanting to know what could be hidden in the sleeping man’s mind. So many question ran through his mind like wind rushing by his face on a cold morning’s jog. But he didn’t dare ask them now, not in front of the taxi man, or the door man at the front of their hotel as he and Yesung slowly made their way into the hotel.
The older man is knocked out once his face hit’s the covers and he doesn’t bother to take his shoes off as he curls up on his bed. Siwon sets the camera bag down by Yesung’s suitcase. He debates if he should go and take the older man’s shoes off and tuck him in while his mind plays out what to do and how to do it. A couple of steps and he would have reached the other if not for the ringing and vibrating of said sleeping man’s phone in his pocket that woke him up.
Siwon ops for a cold shower to clear his mind while Yesung answers his phone.
‘oh Kyuhyun ah,’ said Yesung sleepily.
It wasn’t so much as Yesung saying Kyuhyun’s name that got Siwon to turn back around and stare at the man but rather the sleepiness of his voice. He must be exhausted, Siwon thought to himself before grabbing his towel and heads into the restroom.
****************************
‘I’m fine Kyu, I’m just tired…well I was getting some before you called…..I know, I got you some of those already…..my flight? Umm….at two so we should be arriving at three, why? You going to pick me up?’
Yesung giggled when Kyuhyun told him he didn’t want to waste time into picking Yesung up but he wanted his gift and that was the only reason why he was going to be at the airport at three to pick Yesung up.
‘he’s in the restroom why?…..Kyu ah, it’ll be rude not to give him a ride….’ arguing with Cho Kyuhyun was pointless and Yesung knows better not to, so instead he changes the subject, talking about how great of shots he got of the beach. Another minute of chit chat before Yesung hears Sungmin calling for Kyuhyun. ‘see ya tomorrow, my babe’s calling for me.’ Yesung chuckled, ‘bye kyu.’
After tapping the end button Yesung tosses his phone to the end of the bed, slips his shoes off and stretches. As he sat back down he listened to the running water of the showers, thinking about the past week spent with Siwon and how close they had become -or at least how close he had thought they would be from now on- ‘I guess your right, Kyuhyun ah. It’s time to let go.’ smiling sadly to himself, he got up to get ready for his shower.
*************************
Sleep had always been something that came easily to him, but that night, sleep had not come at all. He tossed and turned till he finally landed on his left side, eyes staring straight at Yesung’s small figure on the other bed, not too far from his. Siwon listened to the air rushing in and out of Yesung’s nose, watched as his stomach raised and fell in sync with the breaths he took.
It wasn’t until the first ray of sunlight hitting Yesung’s eyes and making him frown that Siwon realized he had been watching the other sleep all night long. But the surprising part of it all was that, he didn’t seem to mind. So, when Yesung finally opens his eyes and was a little surprised to see Siwon starring at him, all they did was smile at each other.
**************************
It had been a week since their return from their short mini vacation. Siwon was still trying to remember anything he could before he opened his eyes and Hangeng and Heechul where the first thing he saw. But it was all a blur and the more he thought about it the more it hurt. But he wanted answers. Answers as to why Yesung had a photo of the two them tuck safely inside his wallet.
“Siwon ah, Yesung got a promotion at work so we’re all going out to celebrate tonight.” Heechul informed Siwon who quickly hid the photo in his hands under his pillow. “are you taking a nap? Again?” Heechul asks, entering Siwon’s bedroom and watched as the other sat up in bed. “just a bit tired today, I guess.”
Heechil smiled, patting the younger’s head like a child. “don’t sleep too much. Don’t want you to get a headache alright?” said Heechul like a loving mother to her child. Siwon nods, he watched as Heechul closes his door shut. His gaze to brought to the view outside.
‘what is going on in my life, god. Answer me, give me a sign. Please.’
After few moments of hard thinking Siwon suddenly gets up, grabs his jacket and keys and heads out.
**************************
“uh, Yesung sshi?”
Said man hummed at his secretary, eyes still on the photos he had just taken the day before.
“there’s a man here to see you. He says he’s Mr. Kim?”
Yesung looks up, a little confused because really, Korea was filled with many Mr. Kim’s.
“he also said if you cant remember then to tell you about Jeju Island?”
“ah!” his eyes light up. “please let him in.”
As his secretary hurry on back to the front desk Yesung stand ups to fix his outfit. He took a deep breath, not sure why he was a little nervous.
“you’ve gotten so much cuter then when I saw you last.”
Yesung chuckled, “hello Kangin sshi, how was you flight here?”
Kangin smiled, biting his bottom lip before walked towards Yesung. “how about a hug first?”
Yesung giggled before leaning forward into big open arms.
“lunch?” Yesung asked when they pulled apart.
“certainly” Kangin answers with a bigger smile then the last one.
“sir,” Yesung’s secretary said as he Yesung and Kangin walks out of his office. “there was a man here looking for you.”
Yesung tilts his head, wondering who it could be. “why didn’t you send him in?”
“I told him that you were with a guest, he didn’t seem to mind and walked over to you office. I watched him stand in front of your open door for a few seconds before he stormed off.”
Yesung looked confused, he look at Kangin as if the answer was written on the other man’s forehead.
“um, should we cancel? I mean maybe it was a business meeting or something?”
The other shakes his head, “no, it’s fine. Come on, I know a really great place.”
***************************
‘what the hell is he doing here’ Siwon shouts in his head, driving pass speed limit. ‘and why the hell do I care who’s arms Yesnung sshi ends up in or not!’ thought Siwon. “dam it!” he screams, hitting the steering wheel.
Reaching for his phone when he stopped at a red light, Siwon called the only person who could possibly be the only one who could give him an explanation.
“Hangeng hyung, I need to talk to you.”
***************************
“where did you get this?” the Chinese man asked, examining the photo of a younger Siwon and Yesung.
“from Yesung sshi’s wallet. But the thing is, hyung. Why does he have this photo? And what is it that your keeping from me?”
Hangeng laughed, laying the photo back down on their coffee table. “what makes you think I’m keeping something from you ?”
Siwon arched a brow, not believing Hangeng. “you start your uncontrollable laughter.”
The Chinese man laughed again, “no I don’t.”
“you do it when your hiding something from Heechul hyung.”
The laughter has died down and Hangeng pouts, “I do not.”
“would you stop acting like a baby and tell me what the hell is going on here!?” Siwon demands, snatching the photo of him and Yesung from the coffee table and waving it in front of Hangeng. “I need answers! Not laughter or pouts!”
Hangeng huffed, “don’t blame me when you remember!” Hangeng shouts, pouting like a puppy that had just been kicked. He got up and walked into his and Heechul’s bedroom before coming back out with a laptop. “here, everything you knew before your surgery is in here….but, are you sure your ready for this?”
Siwon arching his brow once again, takes the laptop from Hangeng’s hands quickly, he starts the thing up.
‘yah! Are you sure you want to do that?!’
Siwon stares at the screen disbelieving. A pop-up flashing at him.
“don’t look at me like that! It wasn’t me who wrote that.” Hangeng defends himself, before turning his his head the left, offended at the ugly frown Siwon was sending his way.
Before he could click the only icon on the screen labeled ‘My Life Before’ the front door opens and in comes Heechul with a Sungmin tagging along behind him.
Heechul stops walking, raising an eyebrow in question. “what….are you two up to?” asked Heechul in a suspicious tone to which Hangeng looked away shaking his head and saying nothing as if he was the greatest liar ever. “you don’t want me to beat it out of you in front my guest now do you Mr. Geng sshi?”
The Chinese man pouts, “Hyung,” Siwon spoke up before Hangeng could answer.
“what?” Heechul asked, crossing his arms.
“not you Heechul hyung, I meant Sungmin hyung.”
The quiet man standing still behind Heechul widen his eyes, pointing to himself. “m-me?”
Siwon put the laptop to the side, standing up and walking towards Sungmin.
“why did Yesung sshi have this photo in his wallet?”
The photo was placed in front the shorter man who in return only sighed. “I told him to burn that.”
************************
“I hope you had fun Yesung sshi.” the nervous Kangin spoke as he waited for Yesung to unlock his apartment door. “is it okay I see you tomorrow?”
Yesung smiled, eyes disappearing as he did so. “I don’t see why not. And I had a great night Kangin sshi, thank you.”
The tall well built man smiled victoriously before Yesung watched Kangin walk into the elevator. He closed his front door, taking his shoes off and slumping down on the couch. Lunch was awkward, so awkward that Kangin had wanted to drag the date on longer then it should have. Yesung chuckled though when Kangin’s big goofy laughed popped up in his head. He could get use to those upside down half moon eyes of that big silly man. “it’s not like Siwon’s just going to show up on my door step and demand our relationship back.” Yesung spoke out loud.
It was like god had hard him.
A frantic knock on his front door brought him out of his Kangin daze. “who is it?” Yesung asked, not wanting to open it if it should be a stranger. “Hyung! It’s me! Sungminnie!”
Yesung wondered why Sungmin was shouting why the frantic knocking hadn’t stop. Slipping his slippers on he unlocks the door.
“Siwon sshi?” Yesung called, surprised at the tall man who was huffing at the moment from running up the flight of stairs, too impatient to wait for the dam elevator. ‘thank god, it looks like he ran up the stairs,’ thought Yesung, not wanting Siwon to see Kangin.
“is…is it true?” Siwon pants. Yesung looked confused, turning to Sungmin for an answer only to notice Heechul and Hangeng standing behind him. “um, why don’t you guys come inside.” Siwon rolled his eyes, impatient for an answer. Everyone is gather in his living room, he offered drinks but it seem no one was in the mood.
“tell me the truth, because I’m a little confused. If you knew of my surgery why didn’t you say anything?” Yesung sighed. “how much do you remember?”
“nothing, I just saw this photo and I’m a bit curious as to why you have a photo of me tucked away in your wallet.”
Another sighed escapes Yesung’s lips. He was so frustrated, so angry, so annoyed that he just wanted to take a knife and drive it straight into his chest so the pain would stop.
“I guess you never really even loved me enough to try and help me gain my memory back.”
“YAH CHOI SIWON!” Heechul shouts, angry at the younger’s lack of disrespect.
Yesung is breathing franticly, his heartbeat has picked up, the frustration building up in his chest was going to explode, one more blow from Siwon and Yesung’s heart would definitely explode.
“you were never even going to try and help me gain my memory back, were you?”
And that was all it took. Siwon’s words, like knives flying straight towards Yesung, the fragile Yesung that he once was came rushing back.
“you left me.” he finally spoke. Siwon raised a brow.
“you just…..up and left. No note, no phone calls……just….an empty hospital bed.”
“but you knew about my surgery when we met again at the bar.”
Tears streamed down Yesung’s face, because the fragile Yesung was back, because Siwon was the one accusing him of giving up on Siwon, and because his heart ached so much, the world had gone pitch black.
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“did something upsetting happen?” the doctor asked Sungmin as he measured Yesung’s heart beat with his fingers and a watch. “a little.” Sungmin mumbled, feeling guilty that he spilled the the whole thing, well , parts of it out to Siwon.
“well it must have been upsetting, the blood in his body rushed up to his head all at once, which caused him to black out. Kind of like a person would after consuming a lot of alcohol. He should be fine in a few hours.” Sungming stood up, thanking the doctor before pouting at his pale face hyung.
“Sungmin ah,” Kyuhyun called from the door, sliding it shut once he was inside. “what happened?”
As Sungmin explained to Kyuhyun the situation the younger man grunted, feeling angry and wanting nothing more than to beat the living day lights out of Choi Siwon.
“don’t Kyuhyun ah, your just making this even harder on Hyung.” Sungmin pleaded, but Kyuhyun was too angry to even listen. He was out the door and ready to hunt down the man name Choi Siwon.
****************************
“you were out of line! You have no right to accuse him of giving up on you!” HEechul shouted, defending the man laying in the hospital.
“he knew! He knew I had surgery and he still didn’t try to help me remember!” Siwon argued back.
“that doesn’t give you the right to accuse him! Of anything! I don’t know why your so angry Choi when you were the one who wouldn’t tell Yesung ssho of your illness before you had your surgery!” screamed Heechul at the top of his lunges.
“stop it! Just stop it! Fighting isn’t going to solve anything!” Hangeng stood in the middle of his lover and his cousin. “we’re all grown men here so we’re all going to sit down and talk it out like grown men would.”
Heechul snarled at his lover’s words, turning around to leave. “I have nothing more to say to this fool.” A door is slammed and music could be heard coming from under the closed and possibly locked door.
“what the hell! We aren’t done here!” Siwon shouts, going for the closed door but was stopped by Hangeng. “chill, just chill Siwon ah. There’s no need for you to make the problem bigger then it already is.”
The younger glared at Hangeng. “open the files, maybe this would bring the understanding and gentle Siwon back.” mutter Hangeng before he walked over to the locked door, reaching up over the top of the door frame for a key and stepping inside the room to calm his lover down.
Siwon huffed, taking the laptop to the kitchen table. He clicked on the folder which opened up to him with video logs.
‘ahem….so, it’s I met someone today. His name is Kim Jongwoon, but he likes to be called Yesung. Heh, I think it suits him…..’ Siwon watched in awe at himself in the video. The Siwon in the video blushes and rubs the back of his neck as if too embarrassed to be making these video logs.
‘when he speaks….it’s…its magical…and when he sings, I can’t help but to fall in love with him…..am I being to forward? I mean I just met him today…it was like love at first site….no..it is love at first site. He’s wonderful and beautiful and….well, I have a date with him tonight. I better get ready, I don’t know what to wear and which cologne to use and oh god I’m so nervous. I haven’t been this nervous since…well, forever.’
The Siwon in the video inhale and exhale in excitement before smiling at the camera and shutting it off.
Siwon exit out of the first video log and clicked on the next.
‘I’m going to marry this guy.’ video Siwon spoke, sparks evidently in his eyes. That was all the video said before it ended.
It had been an hour now that Siwon had gone through the video logs and most of them, if not all, were about past Siwon’s life with Yesung. Their first kiss, first hug, first hand holding, first picture, first apartment, their one hundredth day together. It was all there. Then he finally got one that made him cringe at the saggy eyes on the video Siwon.
‘so uh..today we are going to go to the beach, Yesung’s wanted a picnic at the beach. It looks like rain out but…’ pass Siwon smiled biting his lips in happiness, ‘anything for my Yesung…..Yah! Choi Siwon!’
Siwon watched as video Siwon is tackled by an unbelievably young and handsome looking Yesung.
‘come on! You promised! No backing up!…hey what’s this? Haha Siwon ah what have you’ve been recording? Can I see?’
Present Siwon watched as past Siwon hugged Yesung from the back, tightening his hold and kissing his neck. ‘it’s nothing….are you sure you want to go to the beach today? Why don’t we just stay inside, I know something better we could do then the picnic..’
It was hard to watch himself be so in love with Yesung, how his smiled reached his ears and the spark in is eyes never died.
‘I can’t sleep…..the pain had gotten worse. Hangeng hyung’s boyfriend is going to perform an operation on me…..I…..don’t want him to go through this. I don’t want Yesung to have to go through taking care me in this situation……he doesn’t deserve to waste his time on me………heh..” video Siwon chuckles sadly. ‘they say there’s a fifty percent chance I’d make it out alive….but… what if the fifty percent chance that I don’t make it is bigger than the fifty percent chance that I will?’ video Siwon sighed, shaking his head and reaching up at the camera before everything went black.
Siwon sighed, suddenly remembering setting up a camera and on his a desk top in his and Yesung’s apartment. “our apartment?” Siwon spoke out. Shaking his head of any dizziness before clicking on the next video.
‘…….’ Siwon watched himself, sad and angry, sitting in a new chair, in a new background. ‘I want to be with him. Wonder if he stayed at the hospital long when he found out I had left…..why did it have to be this way…….ugh!’ pass Siwon growled in anger, he sighed after calming down. ‘today’s the last video log I guess….since it’s the day of my operation…..but if…if it’s me who just so happened to have made it out a live and is the person watching this video right now….I just….Choi Siwon, Kim Jongwoon….our Yesung means the world to us….he is the most loving and precious human being there could ever be. Find him, be with him even if we have to build up new memories and new courage to even build those memories again. I…we need him….and he needs us. I know Yesung, he’s so fragile and if I just happened to have come out of this operation victoriously then I don’t want to hurt him again. If I survived, let me be with him again….’ ‘Siwon ah,’ a voice called to video Siwon. ’it’s time.’
Blowing out air from his mouth video Siwon looked at the camera one last time. ‘Yesung ah, if it’s not me whose watching this and it’s you instead, know that I love you……so much…..’ past Siwon bit his quivering lips ‘I’m sorry I didn’t tell you….I didn’t want you to have to go through all this trauma….I love you Kim Jongwoon. I love you.’
Video Siwon reached up and the video came to a stop.
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A/N: idk when I’ll get to update again! Hopefully this weekend I can! I hope you all enjoyed it….I mean, it was crap but I still hope you liked it.