Badfic Meme of Doom

Oct 16, 2010 02:12

-Part I-

1a. Do you, or did you, have any role models? John Wayne. Now that's a man's man.
1b. Do you have any heroes or idols, either contemporary or from legend? The Outlaw Josey Wales. That guy knew what he was doing.
1c. If so, have you ever met any of your role models? Fuck no. Are you kidding? He died when I was a little kid.
1d. Did you ever become disillusioned with former heroes or idols? When I out grew my cowboys and Indians phase, sure. Everyone generally does once in a while. Then I found out about his abusive nature domestically....yeah, son of a bitch media loves to ruin a good thing when it's there.
1e. If so, why and what were the circumstances? The media loves to ruin people. It's their job to be idiots of the masses and people buy that shit.

2a. Do you have any dreams or ambitions? I do and it's none of your business.
2b. If not, why? Go back to the end of the line.

3a. What are your short term goals (what would you like to be doing within a year)? ....If I told you, I would have to kill you.
3b. What are your long term goals (what would you like to be doing twenty years from now)? I'm CIA motherfucker. I'm not telling you.
3c. If these goals seem at odds with each other or with your dreams, how do you reconcile the differences? I shoot the fucker in the head that compromises my position.
3d. How do you seek to fulfill these dreams, goals, & ambitions? I do my job.

4a. Do you have any great rational or irrational fears or phobias? I fear nothing.
4b. If so, what are the origins of or reasons behind them? Go back to the end of the line.
4c. What, if anything, would it take for you to be able to overcome this? Here's your sign.
4d. How do you react when this fear manifests itself? I down a bottle of tequila. Fuck me, are you serious?
4e. Are you willing to discuss, or even admit to, the situation? No.

5a. What are your attitudes regarding material wealth? Who ever has the most toys win? Fuck if I care.
5b. Are you miserly with your share of the wealth, or do you spend it freely? Depends.
5c. Are you greedy or generous? Depends.
5d. Do you see wealth as a mark of success, or just as a means to an end? A means to an end.

6. How do you generally treat others? Pass.

7. Do you trust easily (perhaps too easily) or not? Pass.

8. Are you introverted (shy and withdrawn) or extroverted (outgoing)? Pass.

9. Are you a humble soul or unspeakably proud? Pass.

10. Do you act differently than you feel (concealing your true thoughts)? Pass.

11. What habits would you find most annoying in friends? When people talk and say very little.

12. Is there any race, creed, alignment, religion, class, profession, political viewpoint, or the like against which you is strongly prejudiced, and why? Classified.

13a. How do others typically react to you? Two words: Social Avoidance.
13b. Why, in your opinion, do they act that way? Paranoia.

14a. What is your favourite food? What is your favourite drink? Puerco pibil and tequila with lime.
14b. What is your favourite treat (desert)? Fried ice cream.
14c. Do you favour a particular cuisine? Mexican.
14d. Do you savor the tastes when eating or "wolf down" your food? I prefer to savor my meals, thanks.
14e. Do you like food mild or heavily spiced? A good balance is preferred.
14f. Are there any specific foodstuffs that you find disgusting or refuse to eat? Mushrooms. Stuffed portabella's are fine but mushrooms by themselves are very bland.
14g. Are you allergic to any food? Why? Are you looking to poison me? No. I'm not allergic to anything.

15. What are your favourite colour(s)? Reds, golds, greens and blues.

16. Do you have a favourite (or hated) song, type of music, or instrument? Oh my Christ, are you serious? What's that genre called where the lyrics make absolutely no sense? I prefer instrumentals.

17. If you have a favourite scent, what is it? Sandalwood and sage. I grew up with it.

18a. What is your favourite type of animal? Birds.
18b. Why do you have an affinity for that creature? They're free and they don't fight unless they have to.
18c. Is there a certain type of animal that you hate or fear? Frogs and rabbits. They breed and over populate if there's no control.
18d. Are you allergic to any kinds of animals? No.

19. Do you have any allergies? No.

20. Is there anything that enrages you? Mediocrity to the point of boredom established through authoritative means of governmental control or political gain through dictatorship.

21. Is there anything which embarrasses you? No.

22. Do you enjoy "roughing it", or do you prefer your creature comforts? Depends.

23a. Do you believe in god(s) or not? Yes.
23b. Are you very religious? Privately.
23c. Do you actively worship and proselytize or do you simply pay lip service? Not as much as I should.
23d. What lengths would you go to defend your faith? Not far. Everyone has the right to believe what they want.
23e. Was your faith influenced or molded by anyone special? My grandfather.
23f. Do you belong to the orthodox church, or a fringe element thereof (and is the group accepted, frowned upon, or considered heretics)? Roman Catholic.
23g. How has faith influenced or changed your life? I don't kill without a cause or reason.
23h. Is your church an accepted religion where you grew up or did it have to conduct its services in secret? It was accepted but there were debates. Typical no matter where you go.

24a. Can you kill? Yes.
24b. When did you decide (or learn) that you could? That's a loaded question.
24c. What happened and how did you handle it? Let's see, I was a cop for five years and two of those years I never shot anyone. I was on a case where one of the captains in the force was molesting his teenage daughter and I had gone in to extricate her. Needless to say, things went south and everything went down from there. I nearly killed him but he was the first man I ever shot.
24d. When do you consider it okay to kill (under what circumstances)? There has to be a no way out situation but that's debatable in the eyes of the law when it goes to court.
24e. When do you consider it wrong to kill (under what circumstances)? Anytime civilians are involved. Unarmed people should never be used as shields.

25a. What would you do if someone else attempted to (or successfully did) kill under the wrong circumstances, what would be your reaction? First I would assess the situation and find out why the person is pushed to the point of desperation. Second, I would move to disarm the person and third, I would restrain this person until all evidence is gathered.
25b. What if it were your enemy? I don't have any. I kill them before they become aware of my presence.
25c. What if it were your friend? Same as 25a.
25d. What if it were an innocent? Same as 25a.
25e. What if the opponent were not in control of their own actions (i.e.-under duress, charmed, dominated, possessed, etc.)? Same as 25a.

-Part II-

26. What would you do if someone shot at (attacked) you? I'd shoot them to the point of submission, one shot to the shoulder, remove the weapon and have them removed from the premises. It's called an immanent jeopardy situation that every cop knows about.

27. What would you do if something were stolen from you? Depends on what it was that was stolen. Otherwise, I would just by a new one.

28. What would you do if you were badly insulted publicly? Walk away.

29. What would you do if a good friend or relative were killed by means other than natural death? I'd find out what happened and go through the proper channels for a good clean bust.

30. What is the one task you would absolutely refuse to do? Oh my Christ. Dancing.

31. What do you consider to be the worst crime someone could commit and why? Rape. It takes away the spirit of a person. Killing is final. Rape lasts longer and it's harder to overcome.

32a. How do you feel about government (rulers) in general? My opinion is irrelevant. I just do my job.
32b. Why do you feel that way? They pay my mortgage.
32c. Do you support the current government of your homeland? Pass.
32d. If so, how far are you willing to go to defend the government? Pass.
32e. If not, do you actively oppose it? Pass.
32f. Do you belong to an anti-government organization? No.
32g. If so, describe the group and its aims. n/a
32h. What form of government do you believe is the best (democracy, monarchy, anarchy, aristocratic rule, oligarchy, matriarchy) and why? Pass.
32i. Have you ever been persecuted for your political stance? No.
32j. If so, describe the occurrence and how it affected you? n/a

33a. Are you a member of any non-religious group, cause, order, or organization? No.
33b. If so describe it, its goals, and membership. n/a.
33c. How loyal are you to this group and why? n/a.
33d. How did you become a member? n/a.
33e. If you are a former member, did you leave voluntarily or involuntarily and why? n/a.
33f. Was it under good (amicable) conditions or bad? n/a.
33g. Are you being sought or hunted by the organization? n/a.
33h. If so, by whom and with what intent (to murder you, to force your return through blackmail or coercion, to spy on you and make sure they do not reveal any of the groups secrets)? If I were part of any group that used such methods, they wouldn't make it passed by front door.

34a. Do you have any unusual habits or dominant personality traits that are evident to others? Does being an asshole count? I don't take no for an answer.
34b. If so, describe them and how you acquired them, as well as when they might be more noticeable and what causes them? If I'm working, it's part of the job.
34c. How do you react if made fun of for any of these things? I don't care.

35a. Do you have any unusual or nervous mannerisms, such as when talking, thinking, afraid, under stress, or when embarrassed? Nope.
35b. If so, are there any reasons behind them from your past? No.

36a. Do you have an unusual gait? I have a wide stance.
36b. If so, where did you acquire it? It's called having big balls.
36c. Are there any circumstances where they become more (or less) evident? Get on your knees and I'll show you.

37. What kind of accent do you have? From where? Is this your natural accent? I have a very slight smidgeon of an accent that's Southern but well hidden.

38. What place would you most like to visit? Mexico.

39. What annoys you the most? Stupidity.

40. What (if any) are your favourite forms of art? Aztec and Mayan art mostly.

41. What is your most treasured possession? A very fat lady on a donkey painting.

42. What things could you not live without? Phones. I need them.

43. Do you have a good luck charm? Yes. My pentacle ring.

44. If your life were to end in 24 hours, what 5 things would you do in those remaining hours? Get drunk. Get laid. Get stoned. Get chased by a bull and survive. Go cliff diving.

45. Do you prefer to tear down or build up? Tear down.

46. Are you deliberate or spontaneous? Deliberate.

47. Do you prefer the town or the country? Country.

48. If made to decide, would you rather be deaf or blind? Why? Neither but I'll settle with blind.

49. How do you feel about magic, myth, and the supernatural? I know it's there.

50a. Do you remember your dreams? Yes.
50b. Describe a typical dream you might have. No.
50c. Describe your worst nightmares. No.

Part III

51a. Do you have a daily routine? Yes.
51b. If so, what is it? None of your business.
51c. How do you feel and react when this routine is interrupted for some reason? I get pissy.
51d. What does your evening routine consist of? Again, none of your business.
51e. Do you follow these routines during 'down' time, or even when out in the world? Yes.

52. What are your hobbies when you are not out in the world? Cooking.

53. What is your idea of a good evening's entertainment? Watching old movies.

54. What would you do if you had insomnia and had to find something to do to amuse yourself? Crochet.

55. What do you do for relaxation? Work out.

56. Do you enjoy reading? If so, what do you read? Sappy novels with a supernatural twist and no, it's not the Twilight series either.

57. What music do you like? Will you listen to or sing the same songs over and over, or does it drive you nuts when people do that? I don't sing but I do like different genres as long as the lyrics make sense.

58. What things do you do for enjoyment? Rock climbing, cooking and shooting.

59. What do you like to study/learn about? Just about anything that I would consider useful.

60a. Do you have a look or style? I'm relatively eclectic.
60b. If so, describe it. If it fits, I wear it.

61. What do you normally wear in bed at home? Nothing.

62. Do you wear any identifiable jewelry? My pentacle ring.

63a. What pastime (that you participate in regularly) gives you the most enjoyment? Rock climbing.
63b. What pastime (that you participate in regularly) gives you the least enjoyment? Racket ball.

64a. Do you read the newspaper? Yes.
64b. If so, which sections and how often? Current events and want ads.

64. What are your hangout places? Bars, clubs, anywhere people go.

65a. Do you ever go to bars? Yes.
65b. Any specific bar? Just the ones that interest me in the area I'm in.

66. Do you play pool? Yes.

67a. Do you go dancing? Fuck no.
67b. Who goes with you? I'm generally alone.

68. How do you exercise? Running, lifting weights, swimming, mostly activities for toning.

69a. Do you rent or own your residence? I own.
69b. Is it an apartment, house or castle? House.
69c. How close are the neighbors? Relatively close in proximity but far enough that I have my privacy.
69d. Is it a good neighborhood? Yes.
69e. What colour is the house? Brick with black trim.
69f. What about a flower garden? I have roses.
69g. What does your furniture look like? Black crushed velvet with red trim. Mostly modern and matches the decor with a Spanish flavor mixed in with gold accents.
69h. What are your walls covered with? Wallpaper, art, photos? Cherokee art mostly.
69i. What sorts of curtains do you have? Frilly lacy ones, Venetian blinds, pull-down shades? Blinds with thick gold curtains for light and contrast with green tie backs.

70a. Do you keep your house clean? Yes. I'm hardly in it.
70b. Do you clean it yourself? Yes.

71a. What does your desk or workspace look like? Small and cramped, huge and expansive, covered in drifts of books and papers?, neatly ordered and clean? Neat and orderly for efficiency
71b. Can you find what you're looking for when you need it? Yes.

72a. Do you cook your own meals? Yes.
72b. Are you a good cook, a gourmet, or a terrible cook? Good enough for my needs.
72c. Do you eat out? Only when I'm working.

73. Are you on a diet? No.

74. How do you get around locally? By car.

75. Do you get seasick, airsick, motion sick (auto or animal)? No.

Part IV

76a. Are there any modes of travel that either thrill or terrify you? No.
76b. What are they? n/a
76c. Why? n/a

77. Do you like riding animals? I've ridden camels, horses and elephants. Camels take a bit of getting used to but they're fun.

78. Where do you vacation, and how often? I go to my grandfather's reservation at least once a year in the summer.

79a. Do you have any pets? No.
79b. If so, do you take them with you? No.
79c. What do you do with them when you are out in the world? n/a
79d. If you don't have a pet what kind do you want? A hamster.
79e. If you don't have a pet why don't you have one? I'm never home.

80. Do you keep a calendar or address book? Yes.

81a. Did you leave a will? Yes.
81b. What does it say? None of your fucking business.

82a. Do you like being alone? Yes.
82b. If you are alone can you be found? No.
82c. If you were found how would you react? Shocked and ask who the fuck they are tracking me down.

83. If someone was going to play you in a movie who would you want it to be? I hope they don't make a movie about my life.

meme

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