I need prayer support...please
Four years ago, before I was a christian but after I had been exposed to the Truth, I had some confusing times. I had, and still have to this day, a wiccan friend who I have known since eighth grade. She has been an older sister to me up until two years ago and as such has a lot of influence in me. I am a very open person to most things, and being that way has lead me astray when I don't cunsult with the Father. It makes me tremble in fear just writing this when someone will read it. It has to be done though so please bear with me.
I had been baptized during my Sophomore year of high school after returning home from a christian youth retreat with my church. At the time I thought that was what I was supposed to do, now I realize I wasn't ready and have since rectified it to God and been re-baptized.
At that time I was not in the Word as I should have been and was even more easily swayed thanI had been just years later. I know now that that is how things work, but thats not my point. My friend who is a wiccan introduced me to her beliefs. I honestly don't remember how it got started in me, but I turned away in part to go towards wicca.
I researched, studied, prayed to the god and goddess, tried to meditate and failed, and in this processes willfully mocked God, as well as in words shouted to Him. It hurts me to type this out, but God wants me to heal and to know that I am still loved by Him. For months I walked away from God and during it all I still knew He was there and tested Him in this wiccan practicing. I was willful, disobedient, and tested His word to prove Him wrong so that my will would be proven to be best.
I'm cold, scared to type this, and trembling here in my computer chair over something that I should have reconsiled completely with God years ago. He told me to share it with you and before I lose my nerve that is what I'm doing right here on the net.
After months of willful disobedience I stumbled back to church. I've cried, prayed, worshiped, studied, and in all of it hidden from the fear that I am still going to hell because of my ignorant mocking of God. I am not perfect. I am so scared of being unworthy of anyone's love that I think I work against myself and make me stumble.
I've written this here so that I will be faced with it in writing and that maybe you, whoever is reading this, can stand by me and help me in fellowship. I'm scared, but please don't hold it against me the way I have against myself. Thank you for reading this. God Bless.
I had been baptized during my Sophomore year of high school after returning home from a christian youth retreat with my church. At the time I thought that was what I was supposed to do, now I realize I wasn't ready and have since rectified it to God and been re-baptized.
At that time I was not in the Word as I should have been and was even more easily swayed thanI had been just years later. I know now that that is how things work, but thats not my point. My friend who is a wiccan introduced me to her beliefs. I honestly don't remember how it got started in me, but I turned away in part to go towards wicca.
I researched, studied, prayed to the god and goddess, tried to meditate and failed, and in this processes willfully mocked God, as well as in words shouted to Him. It hurts me to type this out, but God wants me to heal and to know that I am still loved by Him. For months I walked away from God and during it all I still knew He was there and tested Him in this wiccan practicing. I was willful, disobedient, and tested His word to prove Him wrong so that my will would be proven to be best.
I'm cold, scared to type this, and trembling here in my computer chair over something that I should have reconsiled completely with God years ago. He told me to share it with you and before I lose my nerve that is what I'm doing right here on the net.
After months of willful disobedience I stumbled back to church. I've cried, prayed, worshiped, studied, and in all of it hidden from the fear that I am still going to hell because of my ignorant mocking of God. I am not perfect. I am so scared of being unworthy of anyone's love that I think I work against myself and make me stumble.
I've written this here so that I will be faced with it in writing and that maybe you, whoever is reading this, can stand by me and help me in fellowship. I'm scared, but please don't hold it against me the way I have against myself. Thank you for reading this. God Bless.