come back, please don't leave me now. i'll be all that you need.
so its been a long time and a lot of things have changed.
matt & i broke up in what was kind of a clean break, but one neither of us wanted. we both care about each other so much, love each other so much. and all of this was said, finally, the night we broke up. i've never felt closer to anyone as i did to matt while we were ending the relationship. i finally told him i loved him. he had said it like 4 times throughout the night. finally. all i had wanted was to hear that and i finally did. the night he broke up with me. i dont know if its really the end. all you girls will get the story when i come home in like 2 weeks. if you want it sooner, just call me.
i'm a mess.
i can't sleep at night. i try to drug myself with tylenol or excedrin (sp?idontreallycare) pm and they do nothing but make me feel sick/high. not that i know what being high is like. but i have an idea. i still can't sleep.
speaking of me coming home. i'm going to book my flight tomorrow morning and i'll update again with dates and then we must plan because i need all of you right now. if there are any shows that you think would take me mind off things as well, just comment :)
life is okay. day in and day out since saturday everyday has been its own. i wish i was the kind of person who could have a rebound, who was comfortable doing that. i called josh. i called morony. i wish i could just go make out with some random guy and feel good about it. have it make me feel better. but i've never been like that and the thought of even being remotely physically close to any guy other than matt makes me sick.
i'm sorry that this is my first update in like 2 weeks and this is all it is. but i need you girls and i love you girls and i'll be home soon.
it's never hurt like this before.
Dear God, please make it stop. Love, Lindsay.
matt & i broke up in what was kind of a clean break, but one neither of us wanted. we both care about each other so much, love each other so much. and all of this was said, finally, the night we broke up. i've never felt closer to anyone as i did to matt while we were ending the relationship. i finally told him i loved him. he had said it like 4 times throughout the night. finally. all i had wanted was to hear that and i finally did. the night he broke up with me. i dont know if its really the end. all you girls will get the story when i come home in like 2 weeks. if you want it sooner, just call me.
i'm a mess.
i can't sleep at night. i try to drug myself with tylenol or excedrin (sp?idontreallycare) pm and they do nothing but make me feel sick/high. not that i know what being high is like. but i have an idea. i still can't sleep.
speaking of me coming home. i'm going to book my flight tomorrow morning and i'll update again with dates and then we must plan because i need all of you right now. if there are any shows that you think would take me mind off things as well, just comment :)
life is okay. day in and day out since saturday everyday has been its own. i wish i was the kind of person who could have a rebound, who was comfortable doing that. i called josh. i called morony. i wish i could just go make out with some random guy and feel good about it. have it make me feel better. but i've never been like that and the thought of even being remotely physically close to any guy other than matt makes me sick.
i'm sorry that this is my first update in like 2 weeks and this is all it is. but i need you girls and i love you girls and i'll be home soon.
it's never hurt like this before.
Dear God, please make it stop. Love, Lindsay.