Update, huh?
Well, here's a rare one, an update. So, I'm going to go into the military. It appears that my couple of summers of laying carpet isn't enough experience for most workplaces. But, I must work, and it seems as if the military is the only people to go to. I really hate fighting, which is why it's okay to go. You see, I really don't want other people to suffer and die when I can just as easily take their place. My hope is that if I go, somebody can come back to see their family. It's okay, I'm expendible. I take a look at everybody's life I'm "involved" in, and I realize that with me off somewhere, they won't be missing much. Even my best friend won't notice I'm gone much, we rarely talk nowadays when they have time. People like the short "blonde" one haven't talked with me enough these past few years for it to make a difference. Ron and Andrea will still go to church, and, hopefully, see Ethan more because I'm not there.
I'm glad that I'm going. I WANT to be noble. I WANT to go. I'm tired of feeling so useless. I want to leave all the painful memories behind here. I want to move on with my life, even if it's very possible this might bring an end to it. But I'm okay with that because I DO have some good memories, even if they are tightly interwoven with the worst. This is probably going to be my last, if not one of my last posts. I have no real reason to keep putting things on here. Maybe all the people I'm "leaving" behind will find all their own individual happinesses. Awesome. I wish I could be there to see it. At least I'm happy, knowing that if I fall, they will be taken care of. And if I'm extremely lucky, I might help touch some lives for God out there on the front lines. Well, everybody take care, this is probably my last month or so here before I'm ready to go.
Cheers-
Patrick
I'm glad that I'm going. I WANT to be noble. I WANT to go. I'm tired of feeling so useless. I want to leave all the painful memories behind here. I want to move on with my life, even if it's very possible this might bring an end to it. But I'm okay with that because I DO have some good memories, even if they are tightly interwoven with the worst. This is probably going to be my last, if not one of my last posts. I have no real reason to keep putting things on here. Maybe all the people I'm "leaving" behind will find all their own individual happinesses. Awesome. I wish I could be there to see it. At least I'm happy, knowing that if I fall, they will be taken care of. And if I'm extremely lucky, I might help touch some lives for God out there on the front lines. Well, everybody take care, this is probably my last month or so here before I'm ready to go.
Cheers-
Patrick