(no subject)
I am so drained.
This week has been choc-full of work class homework and sleeping. I feel like I have so much to do but I'm so tired that I just want to sleep, but when I try to...I'm too exhausted to sleep. I have letters of rec to write, I have applications to fill out, I have grades to improve, I have essays to write. And there is so much pressure on every one of those things, I can't half-ass my way through any of it. Not that I would want to anyway.
On Monday I got a horrific migraine. It lasted over 7 hours (on my first day of school, of course). It was so incredibly painful, and so large, that it brought me to tears on my way home from class around 10. When I got home I was crying to my mom like a blubbering little baby...she got me medicine while I laid down on my bed. I tried to find a spot that would be any less excruciating, but there was nothing I could do. I felt so helpless.
I took the medicine, I'm not sure what it was but I completely passed out. I woke up around 2am, my headache was gone but I was wondering why I was still in jeans...and then I realized that my mom had stayed with me until I had fallen asleep, which was who knows what time. Just thinking about the gesture, such a selfless act was incredible to me. I woke her up crying, she stayed at my bed while I took the medicine, and while I was laying there she rubbed my head and my back until I was asleep, and then left.
Maybe she's done things like this all the time for me when I was younger, but I guess I wasn't old enough to appreciate it. I think a lot of times I'm way too hard on my mom. I know she loves me, she just frustrates me so much sometimes, especially because of her beliefs...that's where we conflict the most. I'm really trying hard to get along with her. I really am.
Anyways, I haven't seen anybody this week. At all. I feel so lonely...
Anybody want to take me far far away this weekend, read 6 chapters, study for a quiz, write all of my essays for USC and finish my application? Cool, thanks.
This week has been choc-full of work class homework and sleeping. I feel like I have so much to do but I'm so tired that I just want to sleep, but when I try to...I'm too exhausted to sleep. I have letters of rec to write, I have applications to fill out, I have grades to improve, I have essays to write. And there is so much pressure on every one of those things, I can't half-ass my way through any of it. Not that I would want to anyway.
On Monday I got a horrific migraine. It lasted over 7 hours (on my first day of school, of course). It was so incredibly painful, and so large, that it brought me to tears on my way home from class around 10. When I got home I was crying to my mom like a blubbering little baby...she got me medicine while I laid down on my bed. I tried to find a spot that would be any less excruciating, but there was nothing I could do. I felt so helpless.
I took the medicine, I'm not sure what it was but I completely passed out. I woke up around 2am, my headache was gone but I was wondering why I was still in jeans...and then I realized that my mom had stayed with me until I had fallen asleep, which was who knows what time. Just thinking about the gesture, such a selfless act was incredible to me. I woke her up crying, she stayed at my bed while I took the medicine, and while I was laying there she rubbed my head and my back until I was asleep, and then left.
Maybe she's done things like this all the time for me when I was younger, but I guess I wasn't old enough to appreciate it. I think a lot of times I'm way too hard on my mom. I know she loves me, she just frustrates me so much sometimes, especially because of her beliefs...that's where we conflict the most. I'm really trying hard to get along with her. I really am.
Anyways, I haven't seen anybody this week. At all. I feel so lonely...
Anybody want to take me far far away this weekend, read 6 chapters, study for a quiz, write all of my essays for USC and finish my application? Cool, thanks.