FUCK Life!!!!
I fuckin life because it's a fuckin bitch. For the past several weeks I've been CRYING because one of my good friends is locked up for 2nd degree murder. I mean yeah but it was for self-defense only and yet they're chargin him as an adult. But the worst thing is, is that people school are saying that the boy who died was a hero. I mean I didn't want him to die and what not but I mean still he was no hero. He deserved to get his ass beat but not to die. and now everytime I go to sleep I hear my friends crying, I hear Brandon CRYING because he has no life anymore. He believes we will forget him. I will never forget BRANDON. I miss him so much, I mean every time I wake up in the morning I make/force myself to believe that everything was just a dream and for a second there, I believe it. after school I go to the catwalk and just hope that it was fake, that he will jump out from behind a tree a start to hump my leg like the old days and just ask for a ciggarette. I wanna see these people that write the newspaper because they were going around writting that BRANDON was a disturbed little child growing up. That he got made fun of for being gay and that's why he did what he did. BRANDON was one of the most nicest people I have ever met and he deserves to be here. I feel guilty because I was there 30 minutes before it all happened and I believe that if I was there then maybe I could of done something to prevent it. I am a man of words and I know I could of done something. Or instead of saying that they wouldn't come back then maybe I could of told them to leave or they could of came with me instead. And then maybe BRANDON wouldn't be in jail and maybe BRANDON could be having fun with us instead of feeling guilty for something he had no controol over. I miss him so much. It's not fair because he has to waste his life for an idiots decision. GAWD why is life so fucked up that way? I'm gonna go try to visit him but I mean I want to but then I don't becauseI don't want to see him through 3 ta 5 inches of bullet proof glass and talk to him through a phone where we are being watched by security guards with high powered riffles. BRANDON was my friend and I will stick by him through thick and thin and I would kill for this guy because that's how important he is to me. I miss you so much. Best wishes and who ever believesd in a god, please pray for him.