blah blah blah
I feel sick.
I have had this amazing migraine for last two days and staring at a computer screen probably doesn't help. Yet, here I am. Staring at a computer screen.
I talked to my dad and told him about this "summer orientation" Santa Cruz has. I told him the date and ask him if he would be traveling up with me.
"Oh no. You can just take a plane up there and go by yourself."
For a moment, I stopped breathing. My dad is crazy. Why on earth would he want to send his youngest child to a far off land all alone with no supervision.
And then it hit me. My dad isn't doing this to me. It's me doing this to me. Summer orientation can just be practice for the two years I'll be a student.
...And again, I was reminded that I am leaving. That I am growing up. That I'm going through this horribly awkward transition. Etc. Etc. Etc.
I'm sure all these self-realizations are getting old, but I really don't think it's hit me quite yet.
And it's no big deal.
Look at all those 18 years that through themselves into a new environment.
Well, I am a wuss.
I bought some tickets to a Beck concert that I am not even sure I can attend because the concert is very close to the date I would be leaving.
I spent a hundred dollars on BECK when I am not even sure if I will be able to see him.
I will probably cry and throw a fit if I don't see him.
Beck isn't getting any younger.
I don't want to see him after he has a hip-replacement.
:(
I talked to a stranger about creative writing and realized I would be horrible at it.
I wouldn't be able to take the criticism and my head is so scatterbrained with words.
If you look up above, you will see my point.