(no subject)
I feel like vomitting every time I see a picture of him.
Not because he makes me sick, but because the grief is that strong.
I really don´t know what to do.
I thought the sea washed away all of this, I felt so new after being slapped around by the waves for hours and sitting on rocky cliffs looking out at the Mediterranean.
I felt so new.
But still, all I want is to do is fix this when I get back to school. I want to work it out, I want to repair this. I want to be with him.
Why can´t I move on? Why must my mind fill my head with silly thoughts of things working out, that deep down he still cares, that love really exists?
I don´t fucking know what to do and no one understands. There´s nothing anyone can say or do to make this feeling lift. People are sick of hearing about it, I understand you just want me to fucking shut up already but this is monumental.
I´m scared of what it´s doing to me.
He seems fine. Why the fuck can´t I be fine? Why can´t I be happy without him?
I fucking hate this. I fucking hate it.
Not because he makes me sick, but because the grief is that strong.
I really don´t know what to do.
I thought the sea washed away all of this, I felt so new after being slapped around by the waves for hours and sitting on rocky cliffs looking out at the Mediterranean.
I felt so new.
But still, all I want is to do is fix this when I get back to school. I want to work it out, I want to repair this. I want to be with him.
Why can´t I move on? Why must my mind fill my head with silly thoughts of things working out, that deep down he still cares, that love really exists?
I don´t fucking know what to do and no one understands. There´s nothing anyone can say or do to make this feeling lift. People are sick of hearing about it, I understand you just want me to fucking shut up already but this is monumental.
I´m scared of what it´s doing to me.
He seems fine. Why the fuck can´t I be fine? Why can´t I be happy without him?
I fucking hate this. I fucking hate it.