(no subject)
its been... almost an entire year since i last LJ-ed!
and just like that, 2016 is almost over and done with.
to be fair, i have dayre-d, mostly conscientiously, over the past year. so much so, it feels a little odd to be typing out chunks of words, without peppering them with emoticons, the way i do on dayre :) but dayre is so... limiting, in many senses. i get to spam pictures, particularly of Jireh, but i don't get to verbal diarrhoea. i don't get to just, pen my thoughts, streams of consciousness style, without caring about coherence, flow, grammar.
i've missed LJ. i dayre because i want to chronicle. but i miss having an outlet.
so. we are at the end of 2016, and i suppose i am in a qualified position to answer my january 2016 post.
2016, 2016, you've brought me a myriad of experiences, of lessons, of fun and joy, of discovery.
in 2016, we moved to our 'lil house o' dreams.
in 2016, we got SportyBacky in a very unexpected sort of way.
in 2016, jireh started pre-school.
in 2016, we had a chemical pregnancy.
in 2016, i learned what it really means to be a homemaker.
in 2016, i learned that i am slowly needing to learn what it takes to try and outdo my husband in our being kind to each other.
in 2016, i learned the sort of sacrifices a mother must make for the good of her child.
in 2016, i realised, with a start, that hey, i am living my dream. a chance conversation somewhere around my birthday, with someone who's known me a long time, reminded me that hey, 10 years, 15 years, 20 years ago, when people would have asked me what i wanted to be when i grew up, i would have always said, without flinching, a housewifey. and guess what, here i am, at 33, as housewifey a housewifey as a housewifey could possibly be ;)
though, of course, i suspect, back then my idea of a housewifey was somewhat intermingled with that of a tai-tai, to a certain extent ;)
oooh i hate this inability to pepper my words with emoticons! emoticons would have helped a lot in enabling me to express myself perfectly. i have to be content with boring ole smileys here.
but so, at 33, i realised i no longer really want to be a tai-tai type of housewifey. i don't even do manicures anymore. and to think i couldn't go without one once every fortnight previously! but since we moved in half a year ago, i discovered that any serious housewifey/stay-home-mommy who is serious about keeping her house clean and who is serious about cooking about one to two meals a day, just cannot do with them manicured nails. i found i had left red stains on our white walls, i found i had dropped fragments of red polish in the rice i was washing, i found i had to paint my nails every coupla days, or every single time i mopped our little house. it was crazy, the keeping up with it all and it took me less than two weeks to voluntarily give up on manicures. i didn't even do a manicure for my birthday, and i didn't do one for Christmas either.
an. amazing. feat. for me!
i still do pedicures though. once a month or so. but i actually diy them now. i haven't the time nor the energy nor the desire to splurge on pedicures anymore.
which is why. i find i am so a housewifey housewifey, with the possibility of turning into an auntie ;), and not a tai-tai sort of housewifey, after all.
still, if i would have just probed deeper into my innermost thoughts those, 10, 15, 20 years ago, i suppose i would have found that this life i am living now is exactly what i want to be doing.
perhaps, though, the way i am living my life would be considered a waste to most. sometimes i do get snide remarks from people, who manage to make me sound selfish, when they ask, "so Jenn bears all the financial burden himself?"
yes he does. and he does it very well, to the praise and glory of our God alone, thank you very much.
i don't know if its because jireh is getting older, but of late, people have nothing else to ask me than
1. when are you going for number two?
2. have you gone back to work? oh why not? can't your parents help you to take care of JohnJohn? your mummy is so good with kids...
*sighs*
well its the second last day of 2016 and 2016 has taught me to bite my scathing replies back, and not let all these get to me. people will have their opinions, people will gossip, people will be inquisitive and people will poke their noses into other people's affairs.
thing is, 2016 has shown me just how vital it is to keep my precious baby close to me, to teach him all i can from God's Word, to try my best to sow seeds of the Gospel in his heart, to nurture him on my own as best i can, by God's grace. and i am so, so, so thankful, that Hubbs has the same beliefs, and wants me to do all these myself too. there is no way either of us will relegate the task of teaching and guiding and nurturing cuppycake to someone else, if we can help it!
2016 has been kind; its given me an entire year's worth of endless hours reading God's Word to jireh, and seeing him slowly grow in the grace and knowledge of our LoRd Jesus Christ.
but 2016 has been cruel too; making my baby grow up too fast, too soon, before i have time to catch my breath.
2017, may i learn to number my days that i may attain a heart of wisdom.
2017, may you be for Him alone.
and just like that, 2016 is almost over and done with.
to be fair, i have dayre-d, mostly conscientiously, over the past year. so much so, it feels a little odd to be typing out chunks of words, without peppering them with emoticons, the way i do on dayre :) but dayre is so... limiting, in many senses. i get to spam pictures, particularly of Jireh, but i don't get to verbal diarrhoea. i don't get to just, pen my thoughts, streams of consciousness style, without caring about coherence, flow, grammar.
i've missed LJ. i dayre because i want to chronicle. but i miss having an outlet.
so. we are at the end of 2016, and i suppose i am in a qualified position to answer my january 2016 post.
2016, 2016, you've brought me a myriad of experiences, of lessons, of fun and joy, of discovery.
in 2016, we moved to our 'lil house o' dreams.
in 2016, we got SportyBacky in a very unexpected sort of way.
in 2016, jireh started pre-school.
in 2016, we had a chemical pregnancy.
in 2016, i learned what it really means to be a homemaker.
in 2016, i learned that i am slowly needing to learn what it takes to try and outdo my husband in our being kind to each other.
in 2016, i learned the sort of sacrifices a mother must make for the good of her child.
in 2016, i realised, with a start, that hey, i am living my dream. a chance conversation somewhere around my birthday, with someone who's known me a long time, reminded me that hey, 10 years, 15 years, 20 years ago, when people would have asked me what i wanted to be when i grew up, i would have always said, without flinching, a housewifey. and guess what, here i am, at 33, as housewifey a housewifey as a housewifey could possibly be ;)
though, of course, i suspect, back then my idea of a housewifey was somewhat intermingled with that of a tai-tai, to a certain extent ;)
oooh i hate this inability to pepper my words with emoticons! emoticons would have helped a lot in enabling me to express myself perfectly. i have to be content with boring ole smileys here.
but so, at 33, i realised i no longer really want to be a tai-tai type of housewifey. i don't even do manicures anymore. and to think i couldn't go without one once every fortnight previously! but since we moved in half a year ago, i discovered that any serious housewifey/stay-home-mommy who is serious about keeping her house clean and who is serious about cooking about one to two meals a day, just cannot do with them manicured nails. i found i had left red stains on our white walls, i found i had dropped fragments of red polish in the rice i was washing, i found i had to paint my nails every coupla days, or every single time i mopped our little house. it was crazy, the keeping up with it all and it took me less than two weeks to voluntarily give up on manicures. i didn't even do a manicure for my birthday, and i didn't do one for Christmas either.
an. amazing. feat. for me!
i still do pedicures though. once a month or so. but i actually diy them now. i haven't the time nor the energy nor the desire to splurge on pedicures anymore.
which is why. i find i am so a housewifey housewifey, with the possibility of turning into an auntie ;), and not a tai-tai sort of housewifey, after all.
still, if i would have just probed deeper into my innermost thoughts those, 10, 15, 20 years ago, i suppose i would have found that this life i am living now is exactly what i want to be doing.
perhaps, though, the way i am living my life would be considered a waste to most. sometimes i do get snide remarks from people, who manage to make me sound selfish, when they ask, "so Jenn bears all the financial burden himself?"
yes he does. and he does it very well, to the praise and glory of our God alone, thank you very much.
i don't know if its because jireh is getting older, but of late, people have nothing else to ask me than
1. when are you going for number two?
2. have you gone back to work? oh why not? can't your parents help you to take care of JohnJohn? your mummy is so good with kids...
*sighs*
well its the second last day of 2016 and 2016 has taught me to bite my scathing replies back, and not let all these get to me. people will have their opinions, people will gossip, people will be inquisitive and people will poke their noses into other people's affairs.
thing is, 2016 has shown me just how vital it is to keep my precious baby close to me, to teach him all i can from God's Word, to try my best to sow seeds of the Gospel in his heart, to nurture him on my own as best i can, by God's grace. and i am so, so, so thankful, that Hubbs has the same beliefs, and wants me to do all these myself too. there is no way either of us will relegate the task of teaching and guiding and nurturing cuppycake to someone else, if we can help it!
2016 has been kind; its given me an entire year's worth of endless hours reading God's Word to jireh, and seeing him slowly grow in the grace and knowledge of our LoRd Jesus Christ.
but 2016 has been cruel too; making my baby grow up too fast, too soon, before i have time to catch my breath.
2017, may i learn to number my days that i may attain a heart of wisdom.
2017, may you be for Him alone.