Weird idea
I kinda wish there was a number you could call and a kindly grandma type would come over, give you hugs and tuck you into bed and stay until you fell asleep while you were feeling blue
I'm a little out of sorts today. Dunno why really. I went to go to sleep for night shift when all of a sudden my brain is like "Your parents are gonna die someday" and boom I'm in tears.
Sometimes I really hate my brain. Its like it sits and waits till the worse possible time to make me think about the worst possible stuff just for fun.
I also hate the fact that I feel more comfortable alone yet I really wouldn't mind someone to hang out with on a more perminant basis.
All of a sudden I miss the days back in Guelph when Tony would come over and just sleep over in my bed with me. We weren't dating, just good friends who would spend nights talking then crash. I miss that. I miss hugs.
I need to start getting more hugs. Maybe I'll bug Simon about that, he's great for hugs.
I dunno what it is. This is the second Friday in a row I've gone complete meltdown without any good reason. Kinda pisses me off since I WORK Friday. You'd think I could jsut melt down on Thursday. it's be more convinent
I dunno I dunno I dunno
This makes me think I should get back into therapy but that's a touchy subject due to a) lack of cash b)I'm AWFUL when it comes to going to appointments if I have to bus for some reason and will end up cancelling/reschuedling on a whim c)lack of cash
Mom mentioned maybe I should look into doing tutoring again and pick up some extra cash. It sounds like a good idea and I may look into that for the fall.
Right now though I wish I could just calm down. Despite the numourous self help books I've read/owned I've never been able to find one that deals with my whole irrational crying. I think I could cope better if I jsut knew that other people were like me and they ended up being okay.
I know I'm okay, my brain just refuses to accept it sometime
Anyway I'm gonna go and try and get some sleep before work, the last thing I need is to have a bad night cause I was alert enough or something
I'm a little out of sorts today. Dunno why really. I went to go to sleep for night shift when all of a sudden my brain is like "Your parents are gonna die someday" and boom I'm in tears.
Sometimes I really hate my brain. Its like it sits and waits till the worse possible time to make me think about the worst possible stuff just for fun.
I also hate the fact that I feel more comfortable alone yet I really wouldn't mind someone to hang out with on a more perminant basis.
All of a sudden I miss the days back in Guelph when Tony would come over and just sleep over in my bed with me. We weren't dating, just good friends who would spend nights talking then crash. I miss that. I miss hugs.
I need to start getting more hugs. Maybe I'll bug Simon about that, he's great for hugs.
I dunno what it is. This is the second Friday in a row I've gone complete meltdown without any good reason. Kinda pisses me off since I WORK Friday. You'd think I could jsut melt down on Thursday. it's be more convinent
I dunno I dunno I dunno
This makes me think I should get back into therapy but that's a touchy subject due to a) lack of cash b)I'm AWFUL when it comes to going to appointments if I have to bus for some reason and will end up cancelling/reschuedling on a whim c)lack of cash
Mom mentioned maybe I should look into doing tutoring again and pick up some extra cash. It sounds like a good idea and I may look into that for the fall.
Right now though I wish I could just calm down. Despite the numourous self help books I've read/owned I've never been able to find one that deals with my whole irrational crying. I think I could cope better if I jsut knew that other people were like me and they ended up being okay.
I know I'm okay, my brain just refuses to accept it sometime
Anyway I'm gonna go and try and get some sleep before work, the last thing I need is to have a bad night cause I was alert enough or something