Amusing Christopher Moore Quotes
"not unlike the toaster, I control darkness."
- Christopher Moore (You Suck: A Love Story)
"She doesn't understand that a writer is a special creature--that I'm different from everyone else. I'm not saying I'm superior to other people, just more sensitive, I guess."
- Christopher Moore (Bloodsucking Fiends)
"Let me say right here, if I haven't made it clear, that I have seen as many pale, naked old-man parts in the last twenty-four hours to bruise my delicate psyche for a lifetime, so don't be surprised if you someday find me wandering the moors at midnight, a crazed look in my eye, babbling about albino Tater Tots nesting in Brillo pads and being pursued by sagging man ass, because that shit can happen when you've been traumatized."
- Christopher Moore (You Suck: A Love Story)
"The music coming from inside sounded like robots fucking. And complaining about it. In rhythmic monotone. European robots."
- Christopher Moore (You Suck: A Love Story)
"Christmas crept into Pine Cove like a creeping Christmas thing: dragging garland, ribbon, and sleigh bells, oozing eggnog, reeking of pine, and threatening festive doom like a cold sore under the mistletoe."
- Christopher Moore (The Stupidest Angel: A Heartwarming Tale of Christmas Terror, Version 2.0)
"People, generally, suck."
- Christopher Moore
- Christopher Moore (You Suck: A Love Story)
"She doesn't understand that a writer is a special creature--that I'm different from everyone else. I'm not saying I'm superior to other people, just more sensitive, I guess."
- Christopher Moore (Bloodsucking Fiends)
"Let me say right here, if I haven't made it clear, that I have seen as many pale, naked old-man parts in the last twenty-four hours to bruise my delicate psyche for a lifetime, so don't be surprised if you someday find me wandering the moors at midnight, a crazed look in my eye, babbling about albino Tater Tots nesting in Brillo pads and being pursued by sagging man ass, because that shit can happen when you've been traumatized."
- Christopher Moore (You Suck: A Love Story)
"The music coming from inside sounded like robots fucking. And complaining about it. In rhythmic monotone. European robots."
- Christopher Moore (You Suck: A Love Story)
"Christmas crept into Pine Cove like a creeping Christmas thing: dragging garland, ribbon, and sleigh bells, oozing eggnog, reeking of pine, and threatening festive doom like a cold sore under the mistletoe."
- Christopher Moore (The Stupidest Angel: A Heartwarming Tale of Christmas Terror, Version 2.0)
"People, generally, suck."
- Christopher Moore