[show me what it's like to be the last one standing]
Part of me wants an excuse for another really emo entry, but that's just stupid.
I really hate being suspended in-between things. Something needs to start, happen...I don't know. I'm ready to go somewhere. Do something. If I get into school it doesn't start until September. If I don't...another year of working (though hopefully at a better job) more rent to pay, staying at home unless Masha gets that apartment (at least I'll be able to afford it?) and taking classes here and there, probably applying early decision for next year. At least there's an end in sight? I'm just finally ready but nothing else is, and it's frustrating.
My math course starts Tuesday...fun fun. >.>
Really want to be doing more creative things, but it's hard to do photoshop work when I know I'm not going to have much time...I can't wait until I've got a regular schedule again. At least I've been writing more--paragraph RP is helping the prose along again. XD I should get back to my originals, as well as the one I'm writing with akisolj.
I am...really excited for PortCon, though. I have all my cosplay materials for both costumes except the sweater for Zack, plus a wig if the one I have doesn't work out, and I started on Elfe the other day...the only problem is if I can't find that sweater, because it's spring now and I should have thought of it before. >.> Maybe a thrift store or, worse comes to worst I can just wear a plain black turtleneck for now.
Romantically, I'm....I really don't know. I think I need to talk to someone, because I have no idea what I'm doing or what to do. I guess that's what I get for waiting, or...something. I love being happy for other people, and I'm grateful for my really close friends, but...it isn't the same, I guess. Again, I...hate being in the middle of things, neither here nor there. That's what it comes down to. >.
I really hate being suspended in-between things. Something needs to start, happen...I don't know. I'm ready to go somewhere. Do something. If I get into school it doesn't start until September. If I don't...another year of working (though hopefully at a better job) more rent to pay, staying at home unless Masha gets that apartment (at least I'll be able to afford it?) and taking classes here and there, probably applying early decision for next year. At least there's an end in sight? I'm just finally ready but nothing else is, and it's frustrating.
My math course starts Tuesday...fun fun. >.>
Really want to be doing more creative things, but it's hard to do photoshop work when I know I'm not going to have much time...I can't wait until I've got a regular schedule again. At least I've been writing more--paragraph RP is helping the prose along again. XD I should get back to my originals, as well as the one I'm writing with akisolj.
I am...really excited for PortCon, though. I have all my cosplay materials for both costumes except the sweater for Zack, plus a wig if the one I have doesn't work out, and I started on Elfe the other day...the only problem is if I can't find that sweater, because it's spring now and I should have thought of it before. >.> Maybe a thrift store or, worse comes to worst I can just wear a plain black turtleneck for now.
Romantically, I'm....I really don't know. I think I need to talk to someone, because I have no idea what I'm doing or what to do. I guess that's what I get for waiting, or...something. I love being happy for other people, and I'm grateful for my really close friends, but...it isn't the same, I guess. Again, I...hate being in the middle of things, neither here nor there. That's what it comes down to. >.