[One-shot] Fear - Part 4
[ Part 3]
Tiredly, Jun turned off the TV and tried to find a comfortable position in the sofa. Just as his eyes closed and his brain tried to find a way to tell Sho how he felt, a soft noise came from behind him.
“Jun?” The whisper was almost inaudible.
Jun propped on his elbows and looked at Sho’s bedroom. It was dark and his eyes took time to get used to the darkness but soon he caught Sho’s form.
“Are you going to sleep in the living room?” Sho asked again in a whisper though this time it wasn’t because he thought Jun was sleeping but because he was embarrassed.
“You want me to sleep with you again?” Jun asked in the same tone, his heart beating fast in his chest. Could it be?
Sho looked at his feet, despite the lack of light he still wanted to hide his embarrassment.
“I-I miss you Jun.” He admitted
Jun would be lying if he said that he wasn’t happy right now. Not only did Sho admitted he missed Jun but he also said it first and Jun wasn’t expecting that kind of confession at the moment. He stood up and walked toward Sho in a manner he expected would look casual.
He stopped in front of Sho and they looked at each other for a long moment. Even before Sho’s accident, this kind of confession was hard for the rapper; he was always too proud and fierce to admit his own needs, so Jun understood how it cost Sho to tell him that right now.
They entered the bedroom and laid on the bed, Sho holding Jun’s hand as he drifted to sleep and before he fell asleep as well, Jun decided that the next day he would force Sho to say out loud all his worries.
The next morning Jun is more than surprised to see that the place next to him is empty. He sat up quickly and tried to find any sign of Sho’s presence in the bedroom though there were none. Just when he was going to call Sho’s name, the shadow of Sho could be seen at the door. The rapper was holding a tray with a mug full of steamy coffee, a glass of orange juice and some toasts. He come closer to the bed and put the tray on Jun’s lap. The latter looked at the tray in front of him then at Sho and couldn’t help but smile at the embarrassed face.
“I thought I could be the one making breakfast for once.” Sho said shyly.
Jun put the tray on the side and pulled on Sho’s hands and forced him to sit on his lap instead. At first the rapper struggled a bit, but soon he became calm, stiff but calm. He gasped and shut his eyes close when Jun brushed his cheek with the back of his hand.
“You don’t know how much I would give to kiss you right now.” Jun whispered, his gaze lost in Sho’s. The latter made a face, thinking about the act and Jun knew it wasn’t the right moment for a kiss. Will there ever be a right moment anyway?
He knew his next question would ruin this peaceful moment, but they needed to get rid of that awkward atmosphere for good.
“What does bother you when I touch you? I mean last night you hold my hand and you felt at ease but when I’m the one touching you, you always try to back off.”
“I’m sorry.” Sho apologized as he stood up.
“I don’t need apologizes,” Jun sighed “I want an explanation. To be honest I think you should tell me how you feel.”
To Jun’s surprise Sho didn’t argued and answered his question after only a few seconds of hesitation.
“I’m scared of disgusting you,” He started and added quickly as he knew Jun would reply back “I know what you told me earlier. Nevertheless, I still think I’m disgusting. When we started our relationship I told you that I was still a virgin when it comes to male to male sex and you told me that you didn’t cared, that it was also another reason for loving me more. So how do you think I feel now that a man had soiled my body?” He was strangely calm as he explained his thoughts.
“Sho, you know that the fact you’re virgin or not won’t make me loving you more or less. I mean, I’m still mad at him for hurting you but just because you’re not virgin doesn’t mean I don’t love you.”
“I know that. I told you that I can’t think straight anymore but there’s one think I’m sure of, it’s that I can’t bear the idea of you touching me at the same spots he did.” As if his body reacted at his words, Sho had shivers running through his spine at the thought.
“Also,” he added; it seemed like he was finally letting go of all he had in his mind. “I’m scared of what would happen if we did it. I-I,” Jun noticed how Sho’s fingers played with the sheets; it was a sign of discomfort. “I…” he tried again but the words just couldn’t get out so as to show his support Jun took Sho’s hands in his, his eyes never leaving the rapper’s face.
“I’m scared…what if I like it? After such an event I should be disgusted for the rest of my life but…but that night…despite the fact that I didn’t want to…I…” Tears started to form in those two beautiful big eyes and Jun knew perfectly what Sho wanted to say.
“You came.” Sho nodded his head down in shame.
“Sho you’re not a kid anymore,” Jun started softly “You know that we can’t control our body during sex and even if you came it was only a physical reaction, it doesn’t mean you enjoyed it.”
“I know that but-”
“No buts Sho. Did you come that night?” Jun’s voice was firm suddenly.
“…Yes.”
“But did you enjoy that moment? Even for one second. Did you want it to last forever?”
“No!”
“Then end of the story. You had a normal reaction, it’s simple to understand.”
Sho stood up, he was still calm but he seemed slightly angry. “You don’t understand, it’s not that simple I have so many questions in my head right now.”
“Then tell me. I’m here to hear you; you can tell me whatever you want.”
Sho snickered at Jun’s words. “As I said it’s not easy.” And he turned around to avoid Jun’s look, his arms crossed upon his chest.
Jun looked at Sho’s back for a second and sighed. Slowly he pushed the sheets on the side and stood up before heading towards the bathroom silently. He came out after a short time, wearing a white tee-shirt and a pair of jeans. Sho noticed the bag in his hands and watched as Jun picked up his stuff.
“Where are you going?” He finally asked as Jun left the bedroom without a single glance at him.
Jun didn’t answer and picked his coat and keys. Sho followed him quickly, calling his name repeatedly.
“You’re leaving me?” Jun who had his hand on the doorknob finally faced Sho when he heard the hurt in his boyfriend’s voice.
The younger man closed his eyes and thought deeply before he let out a deep sigh. “No Sho, I am not. I just think that you need some private time alone to think about that entire story. I’ve been pushing you all those weeks and I’ve just realized today that maybe it wasn’t a good idea. I’ll see you by the end of next week, for our meeting with the rest of the band.”
He could clearly see how hurt and angry Sho was at the moment; he might see Jun’s leaving as a betrayal. Just when he had finally the courage to speak about his worries Jun left him. However in Jun it wasn’t a simple leave, it felt like the right moment to give Sho some time alone to think. He had changed since that first night, he had improved and by the end of the next week Sho will have to act as if nothing happened in front of the others. It was time for him to be confident again, to become the Sakurai Sho he was before; kind, smart, fierce and proud, and with Jun’s presence it was impossible.
“See you next week,” Jun said as he opened the door.
He didn’t hear a single sound coming from Sho’s mouth; the latter was too hurt to even speak.
Finally the day had come. It had been long for Jun, he had counted the day one by one until that day. From today everything would be like before the break. They will have hectic schedules and no more free time and to be honest Jun missed that a lot. However the main topic that he had in mind that day was about Sho. Was he alright? Did he sleep and eat well during that whole week? Jun had been expecting at least a call from the rapper but nothing. And he couldn’t call or ask from news since he was the one who had decided to give Sho some space.
Jun wasn’t the first when he entered the green room. On the contrary he was the last. He heard laughter coming from the room and was more than surprised to see Sho laughing with the others as he came through the door. And something more physical caught his attention.
“Sho-kun?” Despite his surprise, he didn’t forget to make some distance between them when they were in public.
Sho turned around and stopped to laugh when he saw Jun. “Hi, Matsumoto-kun.” He said softly.
“N-nice haircut.” Jun stuttered as he looked at Sho’s new haircut. It was very short and manly, the sides of his head were slightly shaved and a few strands were hiding that huge forehead that Jun loved so much.
Ignoring the suddenly cold atmosphere Ohno stood up and called for a group hug. “Finally Arashi is together again.” He said happily.
“I’m sorry for the trouble.” Sho took a step back to avoid any contact and bowed at his band-members.
“Sho-chan! Stop it, it’s okay!” Aiba patted his back friendly.
A staff member came in and asked them to come in the meeting room where the rest of the staff crew was waiting for them. Aiba and Nino left the green room first, followed by Jun and Sho who was stopped by their leader.
“What is it Satoshi-kun?” Sho smiled.
“I’m really glad that you’re here Sho-chan,” Satoshi rested a hand on Sho’s shoulder. “but please, don’t force yourself okay?” He said sternly and a bit worried. Sho’s smile disappeared right away and nodded once; Ohno did the same and left the green room as well.
During the whole meeting and even the press conference that followed after that, Jun’s eyes kept looking at Sho. The rapper who was usually the main member to talk during those press conferences were abnormally quiet; he kept his head low and only replied to the reporters with short sentences, Ohno doing the main talk and giving explanations. They always avoided the rumors about a possible romance between members, the rumors about fights among the members; Ohno remained calm and professional from the beginning to the end. They smiled when they were asked to take pictures, their idol’s smiles; they had to keep their image. They were idols after all; their work was to give happiness to their fans and entertain the audience. No sad face, no fights and more importantly no personal problem.
“Sho!” Sho stopped in his track in the middle of the corridors and turned around to see Jun running towards him.
“Don’t be so informal here,” he hissed as he looked from left to right checking if someone heard Jun.
“I don’t care what others can think about it right now.” Jun said as he caught his breath. “How are you doing?” He finally asked, this question burned his lips since the moment he had seen Sho in the green room.
“Not bad.” Sho shrugged. “I’ve been better than expected to be honest. It’s good to work again after all.”
They both fell silent for a long moment, looking anywhere but at each other. After a while Jun cleared his throat “It suits you- the haircut. When did you…?”
“Ah thank you,” The older man ran a hand in his newly short hair. “I did it yesterday…my psychologist told me that I needed something new to feel better.”
Jun’s head snapped as soon as he heard about the psychologist. “Your what?”
Sho took a deep breath “You were right. I need a professional to help me. With her help I can think properly again and I don’t have nightmare anymore. I’m not totally cured but at least I can face people’s gaze without being scared.”
So that was why he didn’t have any call from him for the whole week. He had finally decided to seek for help; just with this tiny step Jun knew he had made the right move when he left him. Sho needed a little push and he did it at the right moment.
“I’m glad, really. I knew you could do it. You’re Sakurai Sho! The one who achieved-”
“I miss you Jun.” Jun was speechless at those words. He didn’t expect this kind of confession right now and not with that genuine and serious stare from Sho. He was so different from what he was the previous week. He was less shy and scared, had more confidence and proud. He still wasn’t like the one he was before the accident, but at least the ghost of the former Sakurai Sho was finally visible.
“I can’t promise that it will be like before. I can’t promise that I will be able to forget what happened and I can’t promise that it will be easy.” Sho keep talking as serious as before. “But I can promise you that I’ll try. I’ll try because I really need you and I miss you like you can’t even imagine.” While saying that he rested a trembling hand on Jun’s cheek. Sho wasn’t completely cured that was true, because even that simple touch asked him a lot of effort but Jun would be screaming from happiness if only they weren’t in the middle of their agency’s corridor right now because at last, Sho touched him somewhere else than his hand. A real close contact, an intimate contact.
“Jun?” Sho called him with expectant eyes and that was where he lost it; Jun took a step forward and tried to kiss Sho but his whole world vanished when he felt two hands upon his chest, stopping him; and two big scared eyes looking at him.
“I’m sor-” Jun started to apologize but Sho’s voice cut his short.
“N-not here, please.” He said as he looked around them. There was no one but still it scared Sho.
Jun caught Sho’s hand in his and led him into the nearest meeting room. He closed the door and turned around, noticing Sho in the middle of the room, breathing quickly and heavily.
It was too soon. How stupid of him! Sho was trying his best and showed some improvement and the only thing that Jun did was to be too greedy.
“I- I can do it.” Sho tried to breathe calmly.
“Sho you don’t have to-”
“I can do it!” He screamed and Jun could clearly see that Sho forced himself; he clenched his fists really tight, his head was down and his chest was rising and falling very quickly.
Jun approached him slowly; the sound each of his steps made onto the fitted-carpet resonated in the room. Jun could hear the soft noise Sho made with each intake and how fast his chest was beating into his chest, or was it Jun’s heart?
With a slender finger Jun raised Sho’s face carefully and looked into the bright scared eyes. He brought his face closer to Sho’s and stopped at only a few inches of his mouth.
“Let’s take our time, okay?” He whispered before he kissed Sho’s forehead gently.
Sho exhaled and breathed normally again. He nodded once before he rested his face against Jun’s shoulder, the latter circled the shaking body with his arms and for the first time in a while, Jun felt again how good it was to hold the one he loved.
They stood in this position for a while, enjoying this calm and warm moment.
"Let's go home, Jun." Sho almost begged in a whisper.
Jun gave him an apologetic smile "No."
"No?" Sho repeated, as if that simple refusal was unbelievable.
Jun took a step closer and pushed back a lock of hair from Sho's face. "We're still in the middle of our work; we can't just go home right now."
The genuine smile Sho gave him after that warmed Jun's heart. To be honest it was the first time Sho gave him such a beautiful smile since the accident, and Jun would be lying if he denied how stupidly happy he was.
They heard their names called by a staff member from the corridor, it seemed like they were expecting to resume their work and the staff was looking for them and since they wanted to keep their relationship as a secret they waited for a few minutes until no one were in the corridor anymore and went into opposite ways.
[ Part 5]
Tiredly, Jun turned off the TV and tried to find a comfortable position in the sofa. Just as his eyes closed and his brain tried to find a way to tell Sho how he felt, a soft noise came from behind him.
“Jun?” The whisper was almost inaudible.
Jun propped on his elbows and looked at Sho’s bedroom. It was dark and his eyes took time to get used to the darkness but soon he caught Sho’s form.
“Are you going to sleep in the living room?” Sho asked again in a whisper though this time it wasn’t because he thought Jun was sleeping but because he was embarrassed.
“You want me to sleep with you again?” Jun asked in the same tone, his heart beating fast in his chest. Could it be?
Sho looked at his feet, despite the lack of light he still wanted to hide his embarrassment.
“I-I miss you Jun.” He admitted
Jun would be lying if he said that he wasn’t happy right now. Not only did Sho admitted he missed Jun but he also said it first and Jun wasn’t expecting that kind of confession at the moment. He stood up and walked toward Sho in a manner he expected would look casual.
He stopped in front of Sho and they looked at each other for a long moment. Even before Sho’s accident, this kind of confession was hard for the rapper; he was always too proud and fierce to admit his own needs, so Jun understood how it cost Sho to tell him that right now.
They entered the bedroom and laid on the bed, Sho holding Jun’s hand as he drifted to sleep and before he fell asleep as well, Jun decided that the next day he would force Sho to say out loud all his worries.
The next morning Jun is more than surprised to see that the place next to him is empty. He sat up quickly and tried to find any sign of Sho’s presence in the bedroom though there were none. Just when he was going to call Sho’s name, the shadow of Sho could be seen at the door. The rapper was holding a tray with a mug full of steamy coffee, a glass of orange juice and some toasts. He come closer to the bed and put the tray on Jun’s lap. The latter looked at the tray in front of him then at Sho and couldn’t help but smile at the embarrassed face.
“I thought I could be the one making breakfast for once.” Sho said shyly.
Jun put the tray on the side and pulled on Sho’s hands and forced him to sit on his lap instead. At first the rapper struggled a bit, but soon he became calm, stiff but calm. He gasped and shut his eyes close when Jun brushed his cheek with the back of his hand.
“You don’t know how much I would give to kiss you right now.” Jun whispered, his gaze lost in Sho’s. The latter made a face, thinking about the act and Jun knew it wasn’t the right moment for a kiss. Will there ever be a right moment anyway?
He knew his next question would ruin this peaceful moment, but they needed to get rid of that awkward atmosphere for good.
“What does bother you when I touch you? I mean last night you hold my hand and you felt at ease but when I’m the one touching you, you always try to back off.”
“I’m sorry.” Sho apologized as he stood up.
“I don’t need apologizes,” Jun sighed “I want an explanation. To be honest I think you should tell me how you feel.”
To Jun’s surprise Sho didn’t argued and answered his question after only a few seconds of hesitation.
“I’m scared of disgusting you,” He started and added quickly as he knew Jun would reply back “I know what you told me earlier. Nevertheless, I still think I’m disgusting. When we started our relationship I told you that I was still a virgin when it comes to male to male sex and you told me that you didn’t cared, that it was also another reason for loving me more. So how do you think I feel now that a man had soiled my body?” He was strangely calm as he explained his thoughts.
“Sho, you know that the fact you’re virgin or not won’t make me loving you more or less. I mean, I’m still mad at him for hurting you but just because you’re not virgin doesn’t mean I don’t love you.”
“I know that. I told you that I can’t think straight anymore but there’s one think I’m sure of, it’s that I can’t bear the idea of you touching me at the same spots he did.” As if his body reacted at his words, Sho had shivers running through his spine at the thought.
“Also,” he added; it seemed like he was finally letting go of all he had in his mind. “I’m scared of what would happen if we did it. I-I,” Jun noticed how Sho’s fingers played with the sheets; it was a sign of discomfort. “I…” he tried again but the words just couldn’t get out so as to show his support Jun took Sho’s hands in his, his eyes never leaving the rapper’s face.
“I’m scared…what if I like it? After such an event I should be disgusted for the rest of my life but…but that night…despite the fact that I didn’t want to…I…” Tears started to form in those two beautiful big eyes and Jun knew perfectly what Sho wanted to say.
“You came.” Sho nodded his head down in shame.
“Sho you’re not a kid anymore,” Jun started softly “You know that we can’t control our body during sex and even if you came it was only a physical reaction, it doesn’t mean you enjoyed it.”
“I know that but-”
“No buts Sho. Did you come that night?” Jun’s voice was firm suddenly.
“…Yes.”
“But did you enjoy that moment? Even for one second. Did you want it to last forever?”
“No!”
“Then end of the story. You had a normal reaction, it’s simple to understand.”
Sho stood up, he was still calm but he seemed slightly angry. “You don’t understand, it’s not that simple I have so many questions in my head right now.”
“Then tell me. I’m here to hear you; you can tell me whatever you want.”
Sho snickered at Jun’s words. “As I said it’s not easy.” And he turned around to avoid Jun’s look, his arms crossed upon his chest.
Jun looked at Sho’s back for a second and sighed. Slowly he pushed the sheets on the side and stood up before heading towards the bathroom silently. He came out after a short time, wearing a white tee-shirt and a pair of jeans. Sho noticed the bag in his hands and watched as Jun picked up his stuff.
“Where are you going?” He finally asked as Jun left the bedroom without a single glance at him.
Jun didn’t answer and picked his coat and keys. Sho followed him quickly, calling his name repeatedly.
“You’re leaving me?” Jun who had his hand on the doorknob finally faced Sho when he heard the hurt in his boyfriend’s voice.
The younger man closed his eyes and thought deeply before he let out a deep sigh. “No Sho, I am not. I just think that you need some private time alone to think about that entire story. I’ve been pushing you all those weeks and I’ve just realized today that maybe it wasn’t a good idea. I’ll see you by the end of next week, for our meeting with the rest of the band.”
He could clearly see how hurt and angry Sho was at the moment; he might see Jun’s leaving as a betrayal. Just when he had finally the courage to speak about his worries Jun left him. However in Jun it wasn’t a simple leave, it felt like the right moment to give Sho some time alone to think. He had changed since that first night, he had improved and by the end of the next week Sho will have to act as if nothing happened in front of the others. It was time for him to be confident again, to become the Sakurai Sho he was before; kind, smart, fierce and proud, and with Jun’s presence it was impossible.
“See you next week,” Jun said as he opened the door.
He didn’t hear a single sound coming from Sho’s mouth; the latter was too hurt to even speak.
Finally the day had come. It had been long for Jun, he had counted the day one by one until that day. From today everything would be like before the break. They will have hectic schedules and no more free time and to be honest Jun missed that a lot. However the main topic that he had in mind that day was about Sho. Was he alright? Did he sleep and eat well during that whole week? Jun had been expecting at least a call from the rapper but nothing. And he couldn’t call or ask from news since he was the one who had decided to give Sho some space.
Jun wasn’t the first when he entered the green room. On the contrary he was the last. He heard laughter coming from the room and was more than surprised to see Sho laughing with the others as he came through the door. And something more physical caught his attention.
“Sho-kun?” Despite his surprise, he didn’t forget to make some distance between them when they were in public.
Sho turned around and stopped to laugh when he saw Jun. “Hi, Matsumoto-kun.” He said softly.
“N-nice haircut.” Jun stuttered as he looked at Sho’s new haircut. It was very short and manly, the sides of his head were slightly shaved and a few strands were hiding that huge forehead that Jun loved so much.
Ignoring the suddenly cold atmosphere Ohno stood up and called for a group hug. “Finally Arashi is together again.” He said happily.
“I’m sorry for the trouble.” Sho took a step back to avoid any contact and bowed at his band-members.
“Sho-chan! Stop it, it’s okay!” Aiba patted his back friendly.
A staff member came in and asked them to come in the meeting room where the rest of the staff crew was waiting for them. Aiba and Nino left the green room first, followed by Jun and Sho who was stopped by their leader.
“What is it Satoshi-kun?” Sho smiled.
“I’m really glad that you’re here Sho-chan,” Satoshi rested a hand on Sho’s shoulder. “but please, don’t force yourself okay?” He said sternly and a bit worried. Sho’s smile disappeared right away and nodded once; Ohno did the same and left the green room as well.
During the whole meeting and even the press conference that followed after that, Jun’s eyes kept looking at Sho. The rapper who was usually the main member to talk during those press conferences were abnormally quiet; he kept his head low and only replied to the reporters with short sentences, Ohno doing the main talk and giving explanations. They always avoided the rumors about a possible romance between members, the rumors about fights among the members; Ohno remained calm and professional from the beginning to the end. They smiled when they were asked to take pictures, their idol’s smiles; they had to keep their image. They were idols after all; their work was to give happiness to their fans and entertain the audience. No sad face, no fights and more importantly no personal problem.
“Sho!” Sho stopped in his track in the middle of the corridors and turned around to see Jun running towards him.
“Don’t be so informal here,” he hissed as he looked from left to right checking if someone heard Jun.
“I don’t care what others can think about it right now.” Jun said as he caught his breath. “How are you doing?” He finally asked, this question burned his lips since the moment he had seen Sho in the green room.
“Not bad.” Sho shrugged. “I’ve been better than expected to be honest. It’s good to work again after all.”
They both fell silent for a long moment, looking anywhere but at each other. After a while Jun cleared his throat “It suits you- the haircut. When did you…?”
“Ah thank you,” The older man ran a hand in his newly short hair. “I did it yesterday…my psychologist told me that I needed something new to feel better.”
Jun’s head snapped as soon as he heard about the psychologist. “Your what?”
Sho took a deep breath “You were right. I need a professional to help me. With her help I can think properly again and I don’t have nightmare anymore. I’m not totally cured but at least I can face people’s gaze without being scared.”
So that was why he didn’t have any call from him for the whole week. He had finally decided to seek for help; just with this tiny step Jun knew he had made the right move when he left him. Sho needed a little push and he did it at the right moment.
“I’m glad, really. I knew you could do it. You’re Sakurai Sho! The one who achieved-”
“I miss you Jun.” Jun was speechless at those words. He didn’t expect this kind of confession right now and not with that genuine and serious stare from Sho. He was so different from what he was the previous week. He was less shy and scared, had more confidence and proud. He still wasn’t like the one he was before the accident, but at least the ghost of the former Sakurai Sho was finally visible.
“I can’t promise that it will be like before. I can’t promise that I will be able to forget what happened and I can’t promise that it will be easy.” Sho keep talking as serious as before. “But I can promise you that I’ll try. I’ll try because I really need you and I miss you like you can’t even imagine.” While saying that he rested a trembling hand on Jun’s cheek. Sho wasn’t completely cured that was true, because even that simple touch asked him a lot of effort but Jun would be screaming from happiness if only they weren’t in the middle of their agency’s corridor right now because at last, Sho touched him somewhere else than his hand. A real close contact, an intimate contact.
“Jun?” Sho called him with expectant eyes and that was where he lost it; Jun took a step forward and tried to kiss Sho but his whole world vanished when he felt two hands upon his chest, stopping him; and two big scared eyes looking at him.
“I’m sor-” Jun started to apologize but Sho’s voice cut his short.
“N-not here, please.” He said as he looked around them. There was no one but still it scared Sho.
Jun caught Sho’s hand in his and led him into the nearest meeting room. He closed the door and turned around, noticing Sho in the middle of the room, breathing quickly and heavily.
It was too soon. How stupid of him! Sho was trying his best and showed some improvement and the only thing that Jun did was to be too greedy.
“I- I can do it.” Sho tried to breathe calmly.
“Sho you don’t have to-”
“I can do it!” He screamed and Jun could clearly see that Sho forced himself; he clenched his fists really tight, his head was down and his chest was rising and falling very quickly.
Jun approached him slowly; the sound each of his steps made onto the fitted-carpet resonated in the room. Jun could hear the soft noise Sho made with each intake and how fast his chest was beating into his chest, or was it Jun’s heart?
With a slender finger Jun raised Sho’s face carefully and looked into the bright scared eyes. He brought his face closer to Sho’s and stopped at only a few inches of his mouth.
“Let’s take our time, okay?” He whispered before he kissed Sho’s forehead gently.
Sho exhaled and breathed normally again. He nodded once before he rested his face against Jun’s shoulder, the latter circled the shaking body with his arms and for the first time in a while, Jun felt again how good it was to hold the one he loved.
They stood in this position for a while, enjoying this calm and warm moment.
"Let's go home, Jun." Sho almost begged in a whisper.
Jun gave him an apologetic smile "No."
"No?" Sho repeated, as if that simple refusal was unbelievable.
Jun took a step closer and pushed back a lock of hair from Sho's face. "We're still in the middle of our work; we can't just go home right now."
The genuine smile Sho gave him after that warmed Jun's heart. To be honest it was the first time Sho gave him such a beautiful smile since the accident, and Jun would be lying if he denied how stupidly happy he was.
They heard their names called by a staff member from the corridor, it seemed like they were expecting to resume their work and the staff was looking for them and since they wanted to keep their relationship as a secret they waited for a few minutes until no one were in the corridor anymore and went into opposite ways.
[ Part 5]