Jesus doesn't bother me but your fucking greed does
In case you were wondering where my yearly Christmas rant was, it finally arrived. Although the words to express myself have eluded me, I'll take a stab at it. People are always amazed that I don't celebrate Christmas...and many even say, "We don't celebrate either....what do you think you're husband's going to get you?" Damn it, I DO NOT CELEBRATE. AT ALL. No tree. No gifts. No turkey or ham. Nothing. I find year end/new year cards to send. Or I'll send "Season's Greetings" but you will typically not find anything Christmas related in my home.
I'm amused and horrified by the number of people who tell me that they don't celebrate Christmas, "We don't believe in that Jesus crap..." yet try to demand that KB and I come to their Christmas party. I wish I could say it was just one person that suffers such insanity but it isn't. Its just as bad as telling someone that you're childfree. Its like they feel its some sort of charity, that we are missing the Christmas spirit somehow and its their duty to share. That maybe if we could see how much fun THEY are having, we'll decide to join in too.
I think I'll compare Christmas to marriage. I'm really pissy about marriage. Either it is a religious ceremony or a legal contract. IT CANNOT BE BOTH. Christmas needs to either go back to being a religious event or become a pissing contest in greed. My issue with Christmas is about the greed. Its insane to see people in their 30's and 40's, gainfully employed, all excited and giddy wondering what someone bought them. Or what is worse is when they make shopping lists for you. And my favorite are the friends who judge you by what you buy them for Christmas. Of course, their gift to me makes me wonder what the hell they think of me....or are they just that tacky or perhaps color blind? The week after Christmas is normally a culling time for me as I cast off people I've met the previous year because their behavior at Christmas is just not tolerable. Yes, it really bothers me that much. When I have to repeat myself to the same person that I DO NOT CELEBRATE IN ANY FASHION twenty times, then still give me a gift and get mad about not getting one in return, it says a lot about the person. And their respect for me. Strangely enough, its my super Christian friends who actually respect my wishes. Its the fucking heathens who don't.
So please, do not get me a "little" something. I will not feel included. I will not return the favor. I will be pissed off. If you feel so strongly that you have to spend your money on me, you can donate money in my name to a worthy charity. You can do that for my birthday, my anniversary, any reason at all. Preferably one for people. Don't ever give money in my name to any animal rights group or national "rescue". Especially HSUS, PETA, and the ASPCA. They're all crooks and out of the millions they collect each year, less than half a million total from all three groups actually goes towards animal welfare. Yes, another rant coming on. Spend the money locally. Give to a children's hospital. A mission. Greyhound Friends of NC. The Wake County SPCA. Your local SPCA. But make it something local where the money will be used a bit more responsibly by a group that doesn't have so much overhead.
My apartment is overflowing with crap that people have either given us or the dog and I really don't need anything else. KB and I save and buy whatever we want. If you just want our company because its a time to be together, great! We'll bring beer. Or steak. Just don't expect gifts and don't buy us anything.
If someone bought you something very touching for Christmas, you can tell me, I won't be offended. But if you whine at all about not getting what you wanted and you're over 18, I just might go postal on you. Seriously.
I'm amused and horrified by the number of people who tell me that they don't celebrate Christmas, "We don't believe in that Jesus crap..." yet try to demand that KB and I come to their Christmas party. I wish I could say it was just one person that suffers such insanity but it isn't. Its just as bad as telling someone that you're childfree. Its like they feel its some sort of charity, that we are missing the Christmas spirit somehow and its their duty to share. That maybe if we could see how much fun THEY are having, we'll decide to join in too.
I think I'll compare Christmas to marriage. I'm really pissy about marriage. Either it is a religious ceremony or a legal contract. IT CANNOT BE BOTH. Christmas needs to either go back to being a religious event or become a pissing contest in greed. My issue with Christmas is about the greed. Its insane to see people in their 30's and 40's, gainfully employed, all excited and giddy wondering what someone bought them. Or what is worse is when they make shopping lists for you. And my favorite are the friends who judge you by what you buy them for Christmas. Of course, their gift to me makes me wonder what the hell they think of me....or are they just that tacky or perhaps color blind? The week after Christmas is normally a culling time for me as I cast off people I've met the previous year because their behavior at Christmas is just not tolerable. Yes, it really bothers me that much. When I have to repeat myself to the same person that I DO NOT CELEBRATE IN ANY FASHION twenty times, then still give me a gift and get mad about not getting one in return, it says a lot about the person. And their respect for me. Strangely enough, its my super Christian friends who actually respect my wishes. Its the fucking heathens who don't.
So please, do not get me a "little" something. I will not feel included. I will not return the favor. I will be pissed off. If you feel so strongly that you have to spend your money on me, you can donate money in my name to a worthy charity. You can do that for my birthday, my anniversary, any reason at all. Preferably one for people. Don't ever give money in my name to any animal rights group or national "rescue". Especially HSUS, PETA, and the ASPCA. They're all crooks and out of the millions they collect each year, less than half a million total from all three groups actually goes towards animal welfare. Yes, another rant coming on. Spend the money locally. Give to a children's hospital. A mission. Greyhound Friends of NC. The Wake County SPCA. Your local SPCA. But make it something local where the money will be used a bit more responsibly by a group that doesn't have so much overhead.
My apartment is overflowing with crap that people have either given us or the dog and I really don't need anything else. KB and I save and buy whatever we want. If you just want our company because its a time to be together, great! We'll bring beer. Or steak. Just don't expect gifts and don't buy us anything.
If someone bought you something very touching for Christmas, you can tell me, I won't be offended. But if you whine at all about not getting what you wanted and you're over 18, I just might go postal on you. Seriously.