(no subject)
I always say the wrong thing, do the wrong thing. I never really have the right words.
I don't know why anyone actu - lost my train of thought. Been doing that all day.
Maybe her brother was right. ...I know he was right.
I'm wrong. I'm wrong and I'll just hurt her like I hurt everyone. Say the wrong thing, do the wrong thing, won't ... won't what? What am I saying. I'm lost. Lost in the woods.
I know I'm not good enough.
I can't put people together when I'm not put together myself.
And I'm worried about Nar and about everything and I can't stop worrying and ...
I've screwed everything up by talking when I should have just stayed quiet.
...I think I've said the right things to two people. Ever.
People I've known forever. People I'm comfortable with.
She's an unknown quantity and I don't understand her and it doesn't make sense to me anyway and ...
I'm lost. Lost.
Maybe it wo - no. Can't. It would be better for them all, but ... not for him. ...Or for her. I'm lying to myself if I say otherwise. I have to .... even if it's just for them.
I love her and I hurt her. I will destroy her in the end. He's right, I'm wrong.
I can't stop thinking about it. I know he's right.
And maybe we're all wrong.
Stupid. Not a mistake. Won't call it that. Stupid move, though. Shouldn't've tried. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
...Never mind. Never mind any of it.