Fast
Things always happen fast for me. I suppose it's because I'm the kind of person who takes something when he sees what he wants. I spare little time because I'm an impatient.
I've been living as a kid with child-like views and attitudes. I've been doing a lot of things to please others, and it's that aspect of being child-like that drove me the most crazy and made me the least-happy.
Part of that rose from a harsh insecurity developed when one of my ex-best friends told me that I was selfish--mind you, he was banging my ex at the time. Still, I took it to heart for a very long time, so I made it a point to be as un-selfish as possible and please everyone I could...but in the end, I lost myself, lost my independent nature, lost my individuality, didn't really know how to formulate my own opinions. I relied on others too much.
I've felt the need to grow up recently, and now I'm committed to taking those steps, and the first step was living for myself, and really becoming able to say "fuck anyone else who expects too much out of me, or doesn't like me."
i'm likeable either way, i just won't bend my personality to pander to someone else's needs. Now, I'm allowed to be selfish, as long as it means that I'm preserving my individuality.
Now, I'm taking my life into my own hands and doing things my own way, because I need to, and I want to.
Growing up came fast for me, and I'm glad that it's on my own terms. I'm allowing myself to move myself from under what my parents see as their own ideals, and move into my own. I'm not saying that they're wrong and I'm right, but I'm doing things the way that I intend to do them.
I approach life in a different way, somewhat unconventional. My life is rarely planned, so I'm improvising a lot. Despite that, I'm setting goals for myself that I really want, and that's as much planning I've ever done in my life. But, between point a and point b, it's an elaborate improv performance. It's how I write, it's how I perform, it's how I live, and it's what's worked for me.
Making plans has always been hard for me, at least making elaborate plans. But, with some guidance and a deadline, I make things happen, I make things work.
Some see it as chaotic.
It's my process, and no one else's.
I think that this is how a lot of creative minds work, not all, but many.
I've been living as a kid with child-like views and attitudes. I've been doing a lot of things to please others, and it's that aspect of being child-like that drove me the most crazy and made me the least-happy.
Part of that rose from a harsh insecurity developed when one of my ex-best friends told me that I was selfish--mind you, he was banging my ex at the time. Still, I took it to heart for a very long time, so I made it a point to be as un-selfish as possible and please everyone I could...but in the end, I lost myself, lost my independent nature, lost my individuality, didn't really know how to formulate my own opinions. I relied on others too much.
I've felt the need to grow up recently, and now I'm committed to taking those steps, and the first step was living for myself, and really becoming able to say "fuck anyone else who expects too much out of me, or doesn't like me."
i'm likeable either way, i just won't bend my personality to pander to someone else's needs. Now, I'm allowed to be selfish, as long as it means that I'm preserving my individuality.
Now, I'm taking my life into my own hands and doing things my own way, because I need to, and I want to.
Growing up came fast for me, and I'm glad that it's on my own terms. I'm allowing myself to move myself from under what my parents see as their own ideals, and move into my own. I'm not saying that they're wrong and I'm right, but I'm doing things the way that I intend to do them.
I approach life in a different way, somewhat unconventional. My life is rarely planned, so I'm improvising a lot. Despite that, I'm setting goals for myself that I really want, and that's as much planning I've ever done in my life. But, between point a and point b, it's an elaborate improv performance. It's how I write, it's how I perform, it's how I live, and it's what's worked for me.
Making plans has always been hard for me, at least making elaborate plans. But, with some guidance and a deadline, I make things happen, I make things work.
Some see it as chaotic.
It's my process, and no one else's.
I think that this is how a lot of creative minds work, not all, but many.