up of the dates
no, i never update, thats because im ussualy living-- come hunt me out and senseous time i shall giveth ye. Anyway, I wanted to post what i found quite by accident I assure you (though that rarely convinces me) for i thought it beautifull and inspiring. I can not get enough of that sense of revelation and denoucemnet of silly pointless things in favor real lived and created experiance--- life as art!
from a friends journal:
Elk Grove is like a deserted island to me. I don't know anyone within a good twenty mile radius. (Forgive me if that estimation is off, geography was never my thing.) I mean sure, I can lay by the pool... pet some animals... but it gets pretty lonely around here. Luckily, Samantha asked if I wanted to go to the park and feed the ducks with her today. Last time we went, the ducks wouldn't eat any of our bread. Maybe those ungrateful bastards will actually appreciate us this time.
Maybe I've been listening to RX Bandits too much lately (Hah! Yeah right that's impossible!) but I've been thinking a lot about American values and how fucked up they are and such. I've been poor-ass-broke for the past two months, and the value of my life hasn't changed at all. I'm no less happy than when I did have money to spend.
It's not hard. Find some shit to do for free. Feed some ducks or something. Fuck.
Living here is also the first time in over a year that I've had a TV. Holy shit, those things are awful! Yesterday I saw a commercial for some cream you put on your lips to reduce verticle lines??? Aren't your lips supposed to have those? I have them... and it wasn't until I saw this stupid commercial that I even aknowledged the fact. What kind of bullshit tactic is that!? I figured it out- they tell you that your natural self is ugly so that you will buy their products. I'm sure "verticle lines on your lips" weren't considered ugly until there was a product to make them disappear.
"Am I crazy because I want to touch your skin? Is it ludicrous that I've got nothing to believe in that was built by human hands or controlled by demand?"
None of this is real. I look around in the room I'm in, and hardly anything is real. There's me, a cat, a dog... some pears on the table. Then there's a TV and a microwave and chairs and a sofa. A cell phone, a wallet, a hand-held Free-Cell game. (Some Cortaid- what the fuck?) None of this shit is fulfilling.
I felt more whole in a tent-cabin in the woods, with a dirty floor and paper-thin canvas over my head. Where more was real than what was not real. People, and trees, and dirt, and animals, and contact, and human emotion.
That's why it feels better to hug a person instead of a pillow. To hold a hand instead of a TV remote.
Honestly, I'd rather by crying my eyes out than watching another fucking TV commercial. Tears are real. Emotions are real. Commercials are the worst thing for your brain possible. Worse than any drug you could take.
Fuck hair, and skin, and height and weight. Fuck color, skin tone, lines and wrinkles, "love handles" and "strech marks". Those words were invented to make you feel shitty and for people to make a profit. All I want is your mind and your words, and maybe your arms to shake me and make me feel real again.
I hope this needs no further explination - <3
from a friends journal:
Elk Grove is like a deserted island to me. I don't know anyone within a good twenty mile radius. (Forgive me if that estimation is off, geography was never my thing.) I mean sure, I can lay by the pool... pet some animals... but it gets pretty lonely around here. Luckily, Samantha asked if I wanted to go to the park and feed the ducks with her today. Last time we went, the ducks wouldn't eat any of our bread. Maybe those ungrateful bastards will actually appreciate us this time.
Maybe I've been listening to RX Bandits too much lately (Hah! Yeah right that's impossible!) but I've been thinking a lot about American values and how fucked up they are and such. I've been poor-ass-broke for the past two months, and the value of my life hasn't changed at all. I'm no less happy than when I did have money to spend.
It's not hard. Find some shit to do for free. Feed some ducks or something. Fuck.
Living here is also the first time in over a year that I've had a TV. Holy shit, those things are awful! Yesterday I saw a commercial for some cream you put on your lips to reduce verticle lines??? Aren't your lips supposed to have those? I have them... and it wasn't until I saw this stupid commercial that I even aknowledged the fact. What kind of bullshit tactic is that!? I figured it out- they tell you that your natural self is ugly so that you will buy their products. I'm sure "verticle lines on your lips" weren't considered ugly until there was a product to make them disappear.
"Am I crazy because I want to touch your skin? Is it ludicrous that I've got nothing to believe in that was built by human hands or controlled by demand?"
None of this is real. I look around in the room I'm in, and hardly anything is real. There's me, a cat, a dog... some pears on the table. Then there's a TV and a microwave and chairs and a sofa. A cell phone, a wallet, a hand-held Free-Cell game. (Some Cortaid- what the fuck?) None of this shit is fulfilling.
I felt more whole in a tent-cabin in the woods, with a dirty floor and paper-thin canvas over my head. Where more was real than what was not real. People, and trees, and dirt, and animals, and contact, and human emotion.
That's why it feels better to hug a person instead of a pillow. To hold a hand instead of a TV remote.
Honestly, I'd rather by crying my eyes out than watching another fucking TV commercial. Tears are real. Emotions are real. Commercials are the worst thing for your brain possible. Worse than any drug you could take.
Fuck hair, and skin, and height and weight. Fuck color, skin tone, lines and wrinkles, "love handles" and "strech marks". Those words were invented to make you feel shitty and for people to make a profit. All I want is your mind and your words, and maybe your arms to shake me and make me feel real again.
I hope this needs no further explination - <3