God Gave Rock and Roll to You

Sep 26, 2011 19:25



"From what I have gathered," said Castiel, "Gabriel has enlisted the Grigori to protect all Prophets until Raphael resumes his protection duties."

"You mean there's a chance he could win this thing and put the Apocalypse back on track?" asked Dean.

"Yes," replied Castiel.  "He is an Archangel, and I do not have as much power as he does but ... I feel pressure."

"Of course you do, Cas," sympathized Sam.  "You're leading an army against Raphael's.  I would think it's a natural reaction."

"No.  Not the state of mind reference of 'pressured'.  The physical sensation of 'pressure'."  Castiel turned his head to see Beth standing behind him with her face furrowed in curiosity.  Her arm was stretched out and her index finger was pushed into his buttox.  "What are you doing?" he asked.

Beth jumped and stared at Castiel in amazement.  She had been invisible, but now he could see her.  Dismissing the quandary until later, she regained her composure and turned to Dean.  "He does not have a feathery ass.  It is quite firm."

Chuck just stared in shock, while Sam quickly looked away to hide his wide grin from a confused Castiel.  Dean coughed, which sounded more like a disguised guffaw, and tried to formulate a response with his own big smirk and eyes dancing with delight.

At that moment, Gabriel appeared on the couch.  After a minute or so of laughter, he was finally able to talk in complete sentences.  "Hoo boy!  Thanks for the laugh, Kiddo.  But now that you've had your fun, it's time to go."

"Whoa," said Dean.  "Wait a minute.  What do you mean 'go'?"

Instead of quoting the dictionary meaning or responding with a good retort, Gabriel decided to stick to the facts.  "Beth made herself visible to the Prophet she was protecting.  That's a no-no, especially for this one."

"So then what?  Chuck gets a new protector.  And when it shows himself to Chuck, we go through all of this again?" challenged Dean.  "I don't think so.  She stays."

"Good thing it's not your decision to make, Deano.  It's mine."

"No, it's mine," stated Chuck.

"Well hello, brave little tailor," mocked Gabriel.  "So tell my why you think it's your decision if Beth stays or goes."

Shaking, Chuck mustered up all the courage he could.  "Because nothing horrible has happened to me in the past year, like angels exploding in my living room."  Chuck took a moment to glance quickly at Castiel, then back to Gabriel.  "And because I'm used to her and I don't want to find out that the next one you send is a jackass of epic proportions."

Stone-faced, Gabriel turned to Beth.  "Have you been coaching him and giving him lessons on how to speak to Archangels?"

"Nope," replied Beth, "that's all him.  But I will instruct him to use more appropriate words in the presence of Archangels, such as 'kiester', 'nincompoop', 'blockhead', 'Rocky Mountain canary', and my personal favorite 'assbutt'."

Gabriel stared at Beth for a bit before turning his golden eyes back to Chuck.  "'A jackass of epic proportions'?"  Gabriel's face softened.  "You came up with that?  You're braver than I thought."

"He certainly has courage," said Castiel.

"Yes," replied Gabriel, "but what good will it do him if he gets himself killed?"

"Again with the 'Star Wars' quotes," said Beth, exasperated.  "Could you please stop with the movie quotes and stick to the task at hand?"

"As you wish, Buttercup," said Gabriel with an evil grin.  His eyes twinkled as Beth's rolled upward.

"Gabriel," began Castiel, "even though I would prefer not to have a Grigori near the Prophet of the Lord, perhaps it is best if this one remains here.  She has already met the Winchesters, and they have not killed her.  So, that is almost a blessing unto itself."

Dean was about to object, when Sam elbowed him in the ribcage.

"Except, Little Brother," said Gabriel, "this Grigori has broken more than a few rules in the Prophet Protection Handbook.  Besides, there is an additional complication."

Side-stepping away from Sam, Dean spoke up.  "Listen, you two.  We don't care what rules she has broken.  Everything she's done has been to protect Chuck.  She stays."

"What's the additional complication?" asked Sam.  "Is it huge?"

"Mmmm.  You could say that," said Gabriel.  He snapped his fingers and turned to Beth.  "You will need to decide what to do about this."

Sam and Dean looked around the room after the finger snaps.  Nothing changed.  Nothing was out of the ordinary.  But then, they saw this huge dog come through the kitchen door.  The brothers froze.  They didn't know if it was a werewolf, shapeshifter, skinwalker, or something else.  But if Gabriel and Castiel were still around, then they were safe.

"Kiwi!" shouted Beth.  She knelt down to be at a closer eye level with her furry friend.  Kiwi strolled over to Beth and licked her cheek.  Then Beth gave her a big hug around her neck, sat on the floor, and began scratching Kiwi behind the ears.  Kiwi sat down in front of Beth and enjoyed all the love from her pal.

"What breed is that?" asked Sam.

"Part German Shepherd, part wolf," answered Gabriel.  "I've been training Kiwi while Beth has been here with Chuck."

"Oh?" said Dean.  "And what exactly have you been training her in?  How to fetch pornos?"

"While that's an excellent idea, which I HAD thought of," began Gabriel, "no.  I've been training her in the ways of the Hellhound."

"You've been what?!" exclaimed Dean.  "Why would anybody train a dog to be a Hellhound?"

"Police dogs have similar training, just not quite as intense," stated Gabriel.  "And the Hellhound training focuses on supernatural aspects in addition to the human ones."

Kiwi licked Beth's nose, then made her way over to Chuck, who was still shaking from his Gabriel conversation.  Kiwi touched the top of Chuck's hand with her nose, then she scooped her nose under Chuck's hand to flip it up so it would land on her head.  Happy that Chuck didn't recoil his hand in terror, Kiwi maneuvered her body so she could sit next to Chuck.

"Jeez, Kiwi," said Beth with amusement in her eyes.  "If you get any closer to Chuck, you'll be sitting on him."  Kiwi responded with a lolling tongue.

"So, Beth," said Gabriel, "whatcha gonna do now?  Do you still think you can stay here with your dog?"

"Do you mean that she's here to stay?" asked Beth.  "Or did you just bring her here to stir up trouble?"

Sam looked from Beth to Gabriel.  "She has a point there, Gabe."

"Shut up, Wookie," retorted Gabriel.

Beth stood up from her spot on the floor and looked at Kiwi.  "Here's what I think.  I think that Kiwi should come and go as she pleases.  But she also needs to be careful around Chuck, even though she obviously adores him."

Gabriel crossed his arms.  "Go ahead.  I'm listening."

"I propose that whenever Chuck is outside of this house, Kiwi should be there for added protection.  If Chuck is in here, then Kiwi is free to do what she wants or whatever else she's been assigned to do."

"Well Beth," said Gabriel, "that sounds fine and all.  But you're under the mistaken impression that you're staying here to protect Chuck."

"Well, I am," replied Beth.  "I belong here.  You said yourself that Chuck picked me that night in the bar."

"What else did he tell you?" asked Castiel.

"He said that I needed to guard the Prophet of the Lord for as long as it takes," said Beth.  Then with a realization, she added "until Raphael relieves me of guard duty."

"Then that is your answer," said Castiel.  "You will remain here until Raphael summons you to return to Heaven."

"Wait just a sec, Cas," intervened Gabriel, "This is my card game.  You go back and play War with Raphie, and I'll stay here and play Old Maid with the kiddies."  Suddenly, Gabriel's head whipped backwards.  It wasn't until he looked at the wide eyes of almost everyone in the room, that he realized his nose was bleeding.  "Ow!" he said as he accepted a tissue from Beth.  "What did you do that for?"

She shouldn't have punched him in the nose, but there was no way she was going to let the reference to her as the "old lady nobody wants to be stuck with" go unchallenged.  "If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought to go back home and crawl under your bed.  It's not safe out here," quoted Beth, hoping he'd make the connection to "Star Trek" instead of "Star Wars".

Gabriel snapped his fingers and healed his vessel's bloody nose.  He looked at Beth with admiration, his smile growing larger.  "Fine.  Once, just once, I'd like to be able to land someplace and say 'Behold!  I am the Archangel Gabriel'."

After watching the exchange, Castiel turned to Dean.  "I don't understand.  He IS the Archangel Gabriel. Why can't he say that?"

"I think it's an inside joke among freaks and geeks," replied Dean.

"I fail to see the humor in that situation," said Castiel.

"Naturally," muttered Sam.  He looked back over at Beth and Gabriel.  They weren't laughing, but tears were coming from Beth's eyes and her shoulders were shaking.  Gabriel was standing there, looking at her with a wide smile, hands on his hips, and glints of humor in his eyes.

Beth took a deep breath and said, "Look, Gabriel.  I am honored and beyond grateful that you authorized me to be part of Chuck's protection detail and I should respect you.  No, that's not right.  I DO respect you.  But ... "

Gabriel saw Beth's eyes unfocus and widen in panic.  Concerned, he gently turned her to face him and looked searchingly into her eyes.  "Beth?  What is it?  What's wrong?"

She focused on the Archangel inches away from her nose.  "Raphael is coming!"

"Whoa!  What?" exclaimed Dean.  "How do you know?"

"New song stuck in my head," gasped Beth.  "'Sweet Loretta Martin thought she was a woman but she was another man'."

"How long before he gets here?" asked Sam.

Chuck started moving backwards toward the wall, eyes wider than they've ever been.  "Uh, guys?"  Kiwi stood and moved herself in front of Chuck, ready to protect him from anything.

Sam and Dean looked at Chuck then followed his gaze to the other side of the room.  Raphael was standing next to the bar.  "Well," started Dean, looking around the room, "if it isn't the Wicked Witch of the West.  Where are all of your flying ass monkeys?"

"They are waiting outside," stated Raphael, nonplussed.

"Outside?" snarked Dean.

Raphael turned his gaze to the elder hunter.  "Yes, outside.  I can send you there if you have forgotten what it looks like.  But I would prefer to keep this meeting peaceful."

"So," began Gabriel, "Bro.  Why are you here?  Don't you have something else to do?  Like, oh I don't know, write 'I will not start the Apocalypse' on the chalkboard five hundred times?"

"Gabriel," acknowledged Raphael, "I was made aware of a dispute involving the Prophet Chuck.  Since this Prophet is my personal responsibility, I felt I should investigate, especially when the debate involved my Brother and my adversary."

"We have this under control, Raphael," stated Castiel.  "You are not needed here."

"Castiel, is that anyway to greet your superior?" inquired Raphael.

"Superior douchebag," snorted Dean.  Kiwi lolled her tongue from her stance in front of Chuck.

Raphael looked at Sam and Dean.  "Ah, the True Vessels of my Brothers.  Enjoy your free time.  When Michael and Lucifer are done with their confinement, you two will have a more regimented schedule."

"Listen here, Ru Paul," insulted Dean, "I am not saying yes to Michael in this lifetime or any other.  So, just give it up already."

Amused, a smirk emerged on Raphael's face.  "No, I will not."  He turned to Gabriel.  "Now, Gabriel.  Since I am here and I am not leaving, tell me about this interesting discussion regarding the Prophet Chuck."

Gabriel viewed his Brother's feminine features and contemplated for a moment.  "Okay, Sis. Here's the deal: Beth has been protecting Chuck for the past year while you and Cas played with the Civil War chess set.  Thanks to Simon and Alvin over there, Beth was seen by Chuck, which is against the rules.  So, out she goes."

"What is your opinion regarding this, Castiel?" asked Raphael.  His sinister grin made Castiel uncomfortable.

"He called me an abomination," interjected Beth.  After all eyes turned to her, she nervously added, "Sir."

"Oh really?" inquired Raphael, gaze unwavering from Beth.  "And what of the Winchesters?  What do they think of you?"

"It is my understanding that they weren't pleased when they found out that all Grigori report to you, Raphael," stated Beth.

"Well, this is getting better all the time," mused Raphael.

"It couldn't get no worse," quoted Gabriel.  He saw the slight smirk on Beth's face and the gears churning in Dean's head as he tried to identify the song.

"Castiel, you did not answer my question."  Raphael looked at each person in the room for a moment before stopping at Castiel.

After a nervous glance to Beth, Castiel rolled back his shoulders and took a deep breath as his blue eyes bore into Raphael's dark eyes.  "If you had not been shirking your duties, Gabriel would not have needed to step in.  Now there is a Grigori in the same room as a Prophet of the Lord.  None of this would have happened if you had been personally protecting the Prophet Chuck, as was your duty."

"If you had not rebelled against me, we would not be in a war where my attention is diverted from important matters."  Raphael was still calm.  But the edge in his voice was becoming sharper.  "I asked you to do one simple thing, and you refused.  I did not start this war, Castiel.  You did.  But, I will finish it."

"I disagree with you, Raphael.  But that is not the current topic of discussion."  Castiel turned his head, gave a knowing but steely look at Beth, then kept the look as he turned back to Raphael.  "This Grigori cannot continue to protect the Prophet of the Lord.  She has broken many rules.  An abomination such as that should not be allowed to remain here."

"You are that emphatic that she should go?" inquired Raphael.

"Yes, she should go," answered Sam.  He walked behind Beth and placed one of his large hands on each of her upper arms.  Startled, she looked behind her and up at Sam, who was focused on Raphael.  "We don't want your Grigori anywhere near Chuck.  Actually, we don't want anything associated with you near Chuck."

"I do not care what you think," said Raphael.

"Well you should, Grumpy Bear," teased Gabriel, knowing full well that Raphael knew nothing about Care Bears.  "It would make you a lot more popular with kiddies."

Satisfied with the direction of the conversation, Kiwi moved back to the side of Chuck's leg and sat down.  Chuck looked down at Kiwi and relaxed, just a little.  Kiwi looked up at him, gave a quick lick to his hand, and turned back to Raphael.  Chuck unconsciously put his hand on top of Kiwi's head and stopped shaking.

Raphael rounded on his brother.  "Since Michael and Lucifer are in the Cage, I am currently the highest-ranking Archangel.  And even though this war is about a power struggle, I am still in charge of Heaven and Earth.  Therefore, I decree that Grigori Elizabeth Enoveden will remain the protector of the Prophet Chuck Shurley until Father or I personally remove her from this assignment."

Gabriel struggled to keep his facial expression serious.  "You 'decree'?!  You pompous, arrogant jackass of epic proportions!  You can't just stroll in here with your angelic mafia outside and 'decree' anything."  Yeah, he borrowed Chuck's phrase.  But it was a good one.

"Of course I can," coolly replied Raphael.  "My Grigori.  My Prophet.  My rules."  Raphael turned to face Beth.  With simply a look, Sam's hands moved from Beth's upper arms to behind his back.  Sam tried to pry them apart, but to no avail.

"Beth," said Raphael gently, "with the exception of me and my Father, no one has the authority to relocate you to another prophet.  Not Michael.  Not Lucifer.  No one.  If anyone tries to reassign you from this Prophet, call me and I will handle it personally."  And with that, Raphael vanished from the room.

Sam's arms fell to his sides, and he exhaled sharply.  Dean looked at Sam with amazement and confusion.  "What just happened?  Did Raphael just help us?"

"Yeah," replied Sam.  "He doesn't know that he did, but he did."

"Why would he do that?  I thought he, she hated us because we wrecked his, um her plans for the Apocalypse."  Dean had thought that Balthazar's idea to destroy Raphael's first vessel with Lot's salt was a good one.  It had stopped Raphael for a short time, but now it made referring to the Archangel slightly confusing.

"She does hate you."  Gabriel grinned at Castiel.  "But Big Brother Sissy was so focused on giving you what you didn't want …"

"That he didn't realize reverse psychology was being used against him," finished Castiel.

"Well, sonovabitch," Dean said thoughtfully.  "Do you think we can use that on him to give up the war?"

"Now you're pushin' it, Small Fry," said Gabriel.

As Dean was getting ready to object to his nickname, Beth walked over to Chuck, scratched Kiwi behind the ears for a moment, then looked at Chuck.  "A lot just happened now.  Are you okay with all of it?"

He looked back at her and subconsciously stroked Kiwi's head.  "Yes.  Yes, I'm fine.  Raphael was here, and I don't have to clean up pieces of Castiel from the furniture.  So, yes actually, I'm okay."

Beth grinned broadly and released a small giggle.  Hearing small chuckles from three of the four men behind her, she figured that Castiel was remembering the unpleasantness of being splattered by Raphael.

"Great," replied Beth.  "Then as soon as everyone leaves, I'll put everything back to normal, the way it had been just a couple of days ago."

Chuck's eyes searched hers.  "What do you mean?"

"Sam and Dean will go back to hunting.  Castiel will go back to the war.  Gabriel and Kiwi will go back to whatever they had been doing before today.  And I'll continue to watch out for you, just I had been and will continue to do."

"You mean invisible?" asked Chuck.

She smiled at him.  "Yes.  I will return to invisibility."

Chuck shifted his weight from one leg to another.  Kiwi, who was already pressed against Chuck's leg, leaned against the prophet even more.  "Well, wait.  Can we talk about that?"

"Which part?"

"The you, me, and Kiwi part."

"Sure.  Okay.  But we don't need an audience.  Do we?"  Beth turned her gaze from Chuck to the Winchesters.

Chuck looked around his normally empty living room.  It seemed really crowded all of a sudden.

"Oh, yeah," started Sam.  "Well, we need to be getting to Bobby's anyhow.  We need to bring him up to speed on this whole Grigori thing anyhow."

Beth gave Sam an inquisitive squint.  "But it's getting late, and it's a long drive back to Sioux Falls, South Dakota."  She looked at Chuck, imploringly.

Chuck, who'd been staring at Castiel for some reason, glanced over at Beth.  He realized that he should be saying something and searched through the part of his memory that had been sort of listening to Beth.  "Uh … yeah, guys.  Why don't you stay the night and leave in the morning?  It's the least I can do.  Besides, I'm kinda hungry.  So maybe, at least, stay for dinner?"

Dean's ears perked up.  "Dinner?  Yeah, I'm starved too."  He looked at Sam who just rolled his eyes.  "What were you thinkin', Chuck?"

"Well, it's been a while, but I was thinking pizza delivery."

"And this is where I leave," interrupted Castiel.  He nodded at Sam, Dean, and Chuck.  Turning to Gabriel, his blue eyes made contact with Gabriel's.  "Thank you for your help with Raphael.  However, I find myself wondering if you were truly assisting Raphael with the Prophets or if you were creating entertainment at the expense of Chuck and the Winchesters."

Gabriel's eyes twinkled and a smirk formed on his lips.  "Well, I can always stick you in a different reality for a while and you can find out."

Castiel set his jaw and narrowed his eyes at Gabriel for a moment before turning his head, but not his eyes, to Beth.  "I apologize for my contempt when I first learned of you."  Satisfied that Gabriel really wasn't going to send him to an alternate universe, Castiel moved his eyes so he could see Beth.  "I hope I can call upon you in the future."

"I will be here, protecting the Prophet of the Lord, if you should need me."  She smiled and bowed her head slightly.

Castiel nodded at her and turned back to Chuck, with a quick glance at Kiwi.  Whatever Castiel had been planning to say faltered at his lips.  Even though Kiwi was sitting, her tail was sweeping across the floor with such gusto that her hind end was moving too.  The glint in Kiwi's eyes seemed to say "Play time, new friend!"

Dean took a step back.  "Friggin' angels!  I'll never get used to them disappearing like that."  He took special care not to make eye contact with Kiwi because he didn't want to find out how rough she really played.

"Well, it's been real," said Gabriel.

Before he could even lift his hand to snap himself away, Beth said, "Gabriel, perhaps we could talk while the three of them enjoy the meal waiting for them in the kitchen?"

"I am not eating any angel-zapped crap," exclaimed Dean.

Beth smiled at Dean.  "Good to know.  But there's a roast with vegetables in the crockpot.  The peach crumb pie should be done in about 15 minutes."

Dean's face went from happy to confused.  "A crockpot?!  What the hell's a crockpot?"

Sam smirked and lightly snorted.  "It's a way of cooking food.  It takes all day, but it usually turns out good."

"'Usually'?" countered Dean.  "I don't want 'usually'.  And 'crockpot'?  Couldn't they have come up with a better name for it?"

"Sorry, Deano," said Gabriel.  "Next time we need something named, we'll be sure to get your consent first."

"Uh huh," replied Dean skeptically.

Beth continued.  "Part of my duties is to anticipate Chuck's needs.  I figured he'd be hungry after all of this and made extra in case you two were staying for dinner."

"But what about the pie?  You didn't put that in that, that crockofshit thing.  Did you?"

She bit her tongue lightly so she wouldn't break out in laughter.  "No Dean.  The pie is in the oven."

"Sweet!"  Dean turned to look at Sam who wasn't there.  As Dean scanned the whole room for Sam, he heard a clinking noise, which sounded a lot like a glass lid being removed from a crockpot.  "Hey!  Sam!" Dean shouted as he hustled toward the kitchen.  "Don't eat it all!"

Chuck looked at Beth with a sheepish grin.  "Well, thanks.  I don't suppose …"  His voice trailed off.

"Yes, Chuck," replied Beth to the unanswered question.  "There are french fries in the oven also.  I think your best bet is to wait until Dean has his plate and mouth full, which should be any moment now, before pulling the fries out of the oven."

"Um … are they? …"

"Yes, they're the crispy crinkle cut ones that you like.  But they're gonna be charcoal sticks if you don't pull them out soon."

Without thinking, Chuck reached out and gave Beth a big spontaneous hug.  After a few moments, he composed himself, blushed redder than the reddest crayon, and left for the kitchen with Kiwi following close behind.

"Alright," began Gabriel, "the kids are eating dinner.  I think we've got a couple of minutes before Dean starts screaming."

As if on cue, shouts from Dean and Sam emanated from the kitchen.  "Hey!  Where'd you get the crinkle fries?  Gimme some Chuck!"  "Dean!  Manners!"  "Kay.  Sorry.  Gimme some Chuck, PLEASE!"

With a wide grin on her face, Beth's eyes lit up at Gabriel.  "Nevermind," he said.  "Now, what's on your mind, kiddo?"

"Thank you for what you did earlier with Raphael.  I'm not sure we would have come out as unscathed if you weren't here."

"Hey, any time I can pull one over on ol' Raffie is worth it."

She grinned at him, then turned her face more serious.  "As soon as the Winchesters leave, I'll turn invisible again and continue watching over the Prophet of the Lord."

"Are you sure you want to do that?" asked Gabriel.

"Not really.  I'd rather not be invisible all the time, but I don't know what other options I have."

"You could not turn invisible," said a voice from behind her.  She turned to see Chuck with a concerned look on his face.  Before she could respond, he continued.  "These past couple of days have been strange, to say the least.  But I think it would be even stranger knowing that someone I couldn't see was watching me."

Beth studied Chuck.  "At some level, you must have known that, as a Prophet, you were being watched."

"Yeah, and I know that.  And it still sort of creeps me out.  But this is different.  This is an actual person in my house, all the time, watching me.  Not some angel sitting on a cloud looking at me with binoculars, but an actual angel within arm's reach."

"How did you know I had binoculars?" asked Gabriel innocently.  Chuck's look of horror and Beth's exasperated eye roll were the reactions he was looking for.  "But seriously for a moment, Chuck.  You're okay with the neighbors seeing many ladies come in and out of your house while one lives with you?"

Chuck gaped at the Archangel.  "Oh.  I forgot about that."  He looked at Beth, then looked down at his shoes while rubbing his beard.  After a moment, he raised his gaze to Gabriel.  "Well, I guess I'll just have to stop calling them to come over.  Maybe I'll start going to them instead."

"Yeah right.  Did you forget about your entourage whenever you leave the house?" retorted Gabriel.

"Oh.  Yeah.  I forgot about that too."  As Chuck started to fidget again, Kiwi poked her head out of the kitchen.  She walked over to Chuck and quickly slurped the back of his hand.  He looked down at her, patted her head, and relaxed.

Beth had always known that Kiwi was better therapy than a dumb journal.  But it wasn't until now that she could prove it to Gabriel.

"How about this, Chuck?" began Beth.  "I will remain visible unless you have your ladies visiting.  If you have other visitors, then we can decide if it would be best for me to be invisible or not."

Chuck thought for a moment.  Then switched to scratching Kiwi's ear instead of patting her head.  "Yes.  That sounds good.  I'm okay with that."
"And what of Kiwi?" asked Gabriel with his arms crossed and head slightly tilted.  "She can't be in the house.  Chuck will never get any propheting done."

"Kiwi seems to know when Chuck needs her.  So, what if Kiwi visited only when Chuck needed her?"

"So, you're saying that every time Chuck is nervous, Kiwi should be around to comfort him?"

"Yes," replied Beth with wide-eyed innocence.

Astounded, Gabriel looked from Beth, to Chuck and Kiwi, then back to Beth.  "Are you kidding me?!  What part of 'Chuck will never get any propheting done' did you miss?"

"He's not typing up any prophecies right now," she began.  "He's had a stressful day.  So, it's understandable that he and Kiwi are figuratively joined at the hip."  She glanced over at Kiwi to notice her move a half-inch closer to Chuck's leg.  "I said 'figuratively' Kiwi, not 'literally'."  Kiwi's response was to tilt her head so Chuck could scratch behind her other ear.

"Done.  But if Chuck goes anywhere outside of this house, Kiwi will be there."

"Visible or invisible?" asked Beth.

"That one can be Chuck's decision."

Chuck looked at Gabriel.  "Hm.  I'll have to think on that one.  It may depend on the situation.  But, maybe we could figure that out on our own?"

Gabriel studied Chuck, pretending to contemplate his request.  At last, he said, "Okay.  Sure."

Chuck reached out with both hands and shook Gabriel's right hand vigorously.  "Great.  Thanks Gabe."

Gabriel managed to extricate his hand from Chuck's grasp and wiped any potential Kiwi slobber on his pants.  "That's Gabriel to you, Chucky."

Chuck took a step backwards, slightly embarrassed.  "Oh.  Right.  Sorry.  Excitement and all."

"Ri-ight."  Gabriel looked down at Kiwi.  "Now, remember what I taught you.  If you need a refresher course, you just let me know, alright?"  Kiwi seemed to nod her head as she maneuvered her shoulder blades under Chuck's hand.

"One more thing, please, Gabriel."  He turned to her with exasperation.  "The candy jars on the mantle.  Will you be removing them now?"

He grinned at her.  "Remove them?  Why would I do that?  Especially after I added two more."

"You what?!"  Beth's head swiveled rapidly to view the mantle.  He was right.  There were now four candy jars.  She went over to the fireplace, with Chuck and Kiwi close behind.  She picked up the one with M&Ms in it and turned to Gabriel, who wasn't there anymore.

"Isn't that Gabriel's?  The one with the M&Ms?" asked Chuck.

"Yes.  And this one over here with the Peppermint Patties is yours," said Beth.  She set down the M&Ms and picked up the Peppermint Patties, offering the jar to Chuck, who shook his head.  He managed to eat some crinkle fries before Dean scarfed down most of the pan.

Putting the back the Peppermint Patties, she removed the jar next to it.  "Are these mini vanilla Oreo cookies?"  She looked at Chuck.  "Where do I find mini vanilla Oreo cookies to refill this jar?"  When Chuck shrugged, Beth looked down at Kiwi, who was eyeing the cookies with great intent.  She took off the lid and gave a cookie to Kiwi.  Then Chuck reached into the jar and gave Kiwi a cookie.  After a very short while, the jar was nearly empty.  "I love the white stuff, baby, in the middle of an Oreo."

"Seriously?!  Weird Al?"  She returned the jar to the mantle, with Chuck staring at her curiously.  "Apparently, when Kiwi's jar needs refilling, the song is 'The White Stuff' by Weird Al Yankovic."

"How does he connect to Paul McCartney?"

"I guess they met at a party or two.  And Weird Al has occasionally performed a parody of 'Live and Let Die' when on stage."

"Oh.  Gotcha.  So, what's in the last jar?" asked Chuck, but Beth was just staring at it with a contented look on her face.  Kiwi looked up at Chuck, who returned the glance, and nudged Beth slightly.

Beth shook her head slightly, as if to clear away the fog.  "Sorry.  I didn't realize that anybody knew that I love peanut butter cups."  She pulled the lid off the last jar.  "In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida baby.  In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida, honey.  Don't you know that I'm lovin' you."

"Oh!  Absolutely not!" exclaimed Beth as she quickly replaced the lid.  Sam and Dean came running out of the kitchen to see what the fuss was about.

Embarrassed, Beth apologized.  "I'm sorry guys.  I didn't mean to shout.  It's just that this jar, the one with my favorite treat in it, played 'In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida' when I took off the lid."

"Really?" piqued Dean.  "Well, I could use an after-pie dessert."  He took the lid off Beth's candy jar and helped himself to one or two.

"Hold on, Beth," said Sam.  "I thought the songs only played when they needed to be refilled."  Beth nodded her head and Sam continued.  "So, why do you have 'In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida' playing now, when the jar isn't empty yet?"

"That's a good point, Sam," said Dean.  "I guess I'll just have to keep eating these peanut butter cups until we find out what song plays when it needs to be refilled."

Beth's jaw dropped as she eyed him.  As she gently took the jar away and replaced the lid, she said, "You most certainly will not."



"You know, you didn't have to eat all of the peanut butter cups," admonished Sam from the passenger's seat of the Impala.

"Well, I like peanut butter cups," said Dean as drove back to Bobby's the next day.

"And every other free snack out there," Sam replied as he looked out the window.

"Yeah.  Besides.  How else were we going to find out that 'Maybe I'm Amazed' was the refill song on her candy jar?"

"We coulda waited."  Sam didn't get much of a response.  A slight head tilt perhaps, but that was it.  After a couple of miles, Sam mused, "There's something I don't understand."

"Oh?  What's that?"

"Why 'In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida'?  I mean, that's not related to Paul McCartney.  Is it?"

"Not that I know of," replied Dean.  "But did you know that the lead singer for Iron Butterfly was drunk during one of the recordings and slurred the lyrics?"

"Nope.  I didn't know that.  And I'm probably gonna regret asking, but what were the lyrics supposed to be?"

"In the Garden of Eden," said Dean with pride.  He knew his rock trivia.  That was one trivia category that he could kick Sam's butt in.  Everything else, not a chance.

"Hey!  Remember what that nameplate said? 'Elizabeth The Guard Enoveden'."

"Yeah.  So?  Your point, Sam?"

"What if 'The Guard Enoveden' really meant 'The Garden of Eden'?  Which would make sense with the candy jar."

"What?  That makes no sense."

"Think about it, Dean.  'In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida' for Beth.  'God Gave Rock and Roll to You' for Chuck."  Sam paused and stared at Dean in disbelief.

Dean casually looked at Sam to see why he stopped talking.  Seeing the shock on Sam's face, Dean became concerned.  "What?  You mean you think Chuck and Beth are God and the Garden of Eden?  Do you know how absurd that sounds, Sammy?"

"Yeah, I know, but it all fits."

"Fits or not.  That's craziness, Sam.  No one is going to believe that Chuck, OUR Chuck, the pain-in-the-ass Author Chuck, is God.  Hell, Castiel's searched all over for God and couldn't find God.  And when you were standing next to Chuck, did you feel that God was standing next to you?  No.  Does God really panic when his newly-waxed floors are in danger?  Really?  C'mon Sam.  That's just crazy talk."

Sam exhaled with a slight chuckle.  "Well, now that you put it that way, yeah, it sounds crazy."

"Damn straight," replied Dean.  "Now, Driver picks the music."  He reached over, turned on the radio, heard two beats-worth of music, and hastily turned the radio off.

Quizzically, Sam stared at Dean.  "What'd you do that for?  What song was it?"

Shaking his head, he reached for the radio button again.  "You wouldn't believe me if I told you, Sammy.  You wouldn't believe me."

Turning on the radio again, Dean embraced the song by turning up the volume.  Sam just sat there, feeling as if the blood was draining from his face.

"Oh won't you come with me.  And take my hand.  Oh won't you come with me.  And walk this land.  Please take my hand.  In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida, baby."

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character:chuck, character:sam, genre:au (canon), character:castiel, character:originals, character:raphael, rating:pg, season:6, character:dean, character:gabriel, ofc

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