GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY GODDAMN FUCKING KITCHEN!
This Angry Cooking Day has been brought to you in part by:
The Makers of Me.
and
The Entire Country of The United States of America who celebrate Christmas.
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So angry cooking day started at 8:37 a.m. I was innocently in the kitchen cooking some breakfast. Purely for the fact that I was hungry, not angry. I had just gotten back from walmart, because I am a good grandson and getting last minute things for grandma since she doesn't drive anymore(thank god, scares the piss out of me, god love her) it makes it hard for her to get out to the store. So I was cooking an angus burger, some bacon, and I was going to lightly butter and toast a sourdough bun....it's a dish that makes me really happy. So I had the burger going on the griddle. I had the bacon going in the cast iron skillet and I was gently splitting the sourdough bun open. My mom walks in the kitchen and says: "Whatcha cookin' ......oh you read my mind! I need enough to make a sandwich!" Turns to the stove, flips all the bacon over and pulls out a piece and eats it. There are SOOO many things that just made me want to smack her right there. First, we don't ask me what I'm cooking. Second, no I didn't read your mind, that bacon was for me. Third, DON'T FUCKING TOUCH IT! I am cooking, not you, thus do not turn over the bacon for me, I don't care if it's on fire! I am the cook! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY KITCHEN!!!!! Fourth, don't eat the fucking food I am cooking. I put exactly six pieces of bacon in the skillet and put the rest of it away for a reason. So I stand in the kitchen and make cherry Kool-Aid while I watch her take over my cooking. And she proceeds to cook the entire thing. And now that it's done, I only at a third of it. Because I launched into Angry Cooking mode. When I'm in that mode, I'm not hungry. I eat things when I'm cooking to make sure they taste how they are supposed to.
And Grandma--just because you don't want pie doesn't mean other people won't. In fact I know Zeonia wants pie, so guess what?! When you were on the phone with mom and I overheard her say you didn't want pie I started making it right then and there. It's in the oven right now.
Ok I think we are going to turn on some angsty teenage alt music and play Tony Hawk.....that will make me happy.......
***Edit: Tony Hawk won't work in the console, too beat up...***
***Edit 2: Snowboarding game won't work either......well fuck***
The Makers of Me.
and
The Entire Country of The United States of America who celebrate Christmas.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
So angry cooking day started at 8:37 a.m. I was innocently in the kitchen cooking some breakfast. Purely for the fact that I was hungry, not angry. I had just gotten back from walmart, because I am a good grandson and getting last minute things for grandma since she doesn't drive anymore(thank god, scares the piss out of me, god love her) it makes it hard for her to get out to the store. So I was cooking an angus burger, some bacon, and I was going to lightly butter and toast a sourdough bun....it's a dish that makes me really happy. So I had the burger going on the griddle. I had the bacon going in the cast iron skillet and I was gently splitting the sourdough bun open. My mom walks in the kitchen and says: "Whatcha cookin' ......oh you read my mind! I need enough to make a sandwich!" Turns to the stove, flips all the bacon over and pulls out a piece and eats it. There are SOOO many things that just made me want to smack her right there. First, we don't ask me what I'm cooking. Second, no I didn't read your mind, that bacon was for me. Third, DON'T FUCKING TOUCH IT! I am cooking, not you, thus do not turn over the bacon for me, I don't care if it's on fire! I am the cook! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY KITCHEN!!!!! Fourth, don't eat the fucking food I am cooking. I put exactly six pieces of bacon in the skillet and put the rest of it away for a reason. So I stand in the kitchen and make cherry Kool-Aid while I watch her take over my cooking. And she proceeds to cook the entire thing. And now that it's done, I only at a third of it. Because I launched into Angry Cooking mode. When I'm in that mode, I'm not hungry. I eat things when I'm cooking to make sure they taste how they are supposed to.
And Grandma--just because you don't want pie doesn't mean other people won't. In fact I know Zeonia wants pie, so guess what?! When you were on the phone with mom and I overheard her say you didn't want pie I started making it right then and there. It's in the oven right now.
Ok I think we are going to turn on some angsty teenage alt music and play Tony Hawk.....that will make me happy.......
***Edit: Tony Hawk won't work in the console, too beat up...***
***Edit 2: Snowboarding game won't work either......well fuck***