(no subject)
I never realized how nice it is so wake up with someone next to you...mmmmm
My summer is going pretty well...playing at church...doing various music gigs around town...lots of reading...practicing (although not as much as I should..why can't I motivate myself during the summer?). The Southeastern Piano Festival is going on this week and I'm helping with that. These kids are amazing. I used to envy people like this...kids who play so well...and so maturely...I mean, I was no where near their level when I was their age. But everything comes at a price...like social skills....When accompanying others, I become aware of "weird" habits...some people moan and make other strange noises when they play....some people make funny faces...it makes we wonder how I look....but then again...I'm not sure I really want to know.
So...I guess "experience" doesn't allows=good. I used to think that. I guess some things come naturally. Perhaps it's more about the connection than the "know how". I mean, everyone's different right? so it's more important to figure out what makes a person "tick"...maybe that's what is meant by "good". Hmmmmm...
I spent last week in GA visiting my parents. It was actually a nice visit until the night before I left...when I was reminded again of my mother's narrow mindness and overall self-righteous attitude. How can someone who claims to believe in principles of love...be so...hateful. She really doesn't know me at all...and I'm not just talking about the new me...I mean, she never actually knew me at all....she never gave me a chance....
When am I going to stop letting this interfere with my life? I keep telling myself it'll get better once I'm "settled" and more established in my career. But will it? Why can't I stop it now? I don't believe the same things she does. She lives in a box...and I feel sorry for her, to be honest. What kind of life is that? Can't you see what you're missing?
So...I think I'm going to start meditating. It'll be good for me. I mean, the thought of sitting absolutely still and being completely alone with my thoughts for at least fifteen minutes terrifies me....but I think it'll be most helpful.
My summer is going pretty well...playing at church...doing various music gigs around town...lots of reading...practicing (although not as much as I should..why can't I motivate myself during the summer?). The Southeastern Piano Festival is going on this week and I'm helping with that. These kids are amazing. I used to envy people like this...kids who play so well...and so maturely...I mean, I was no where near their level when I was their age. But everything comes at a price...like social skills....When accompanying others, I become aware of "weird" habits...some people moan and make other strange noises when they play....some people make funny faces...it makes we wonder how I look....but then again...I'm not sure I really want to know.
So...I guess "experience" doesn't allows=good. I used to think that. I guess some things come naturally. Perhaps it's more about the connection than the "know how". I mean, everyone's different right? so it's more important to figure out what makes a person "tick"...maybe that's what is meant by "good". Hmmmmm...
I spent last week in GA visiting my parents. It was actually a nice visit until the night before I left...when I was reminded again of my mother's narrow mindness and overall self-righteous attitude. How can someone who claims to believe in principles of love...be so...hateful. She really doesn't know me at all...and I'm not just talking about the new me...I mean, she never actually knew me at all....she never gave me a chance....
When am I going to stop letting this interfere with my life? I keep telling myself it'll get better once I'm "settled" and more established in my career. But will it? Why can't I stop it now? I don't believe the same things she does. She lives in a box...and I feel sorry for her, to be honest. What kind of life is that? Can't you see what you're missing?
So...I think I'm going to start meditating. It'll be good for me. I mean, the thought of sitting absolutely still and being completely alone with my thoughts for at least fifteen minutes terrifies me....but I think it'll be most helpful.