Hitting back

[betterthanhim]

Well, since this place seems good for advice, if not much else, so I'll give it a shot

Comments

[brilliant_bug]

Playing pranks always worked for me.

[betterthanhim]

No, no--we're not on that kind of terms. I want him to suffer.

[brilliant_bug]

Ahhhh.

Well, suffering's not really my style, yanno. *shrugs* But playing pranks could lead into ultimate suffering, I hear.

[betterthanhim]

*smirks* For the pranker, or the one who the prank is for?

[kalinka_cossack]

YOU.

[betterthanhim]

Why, hello, Kalinka. *smirks* You're looking well today. Gonna go run off screaming for pogobot now?

[kalinka_cossack]

You stay away from me! *backs away*

[betterthanhim]

Hey, I'm not touching you. I've had my fill of screaming, crying little girls.

[hindsight]

D: Hurting people is bad!

[betterthanhim]

Of course. That's why I like it.

[hindsight]

...Why? D:

[ Aaand... Now I have to go. D: ]

[betterthanhim]

'Cause it's fun, and it beats being good. *makes a face*

((S'okay. :D))

[evolved_trigger]

...dude, do you even have the smarts to pull off something like that?

[betterthanhim]

Dude, are you even out of diapers yet? You obviously have me confused with Wily.

[evolved_trigger]

Well, given that you have to ask advice on how to get back at someone without touching them, I kinda doubt you'd be able to handle actually getting anything like that done.

[betterthanhim]

You're thinking on a straight line, kiddy-bot. The world is rarely made of straight lines. It's easy to get back at someone without touching them; all you have to do is hurt someone close to them. I was merely wondering if anyone had creative suggestions.

So, do you, or are you just here to repeat the ol' good guy moral outrage/mocking doubt speech?

[skjam]

Well, if the other person is as juvenile as you seem to be, the "I'm not touching you" game should do the trick. To play, you get as close to the other person physically as you can without actually making contact, then announce, "I'm not touching you." Then do your level best to stay at exactly that distance as long as possible. (It helps if you're a touch faster than the other person, so you can anticipate his moves.)

The advanced version is "I'm not hitting you," which involves you throwing punches and kicks that stop just short of connecting, and announcing "I'm not hitting you." This requires a fair amount of skill, since the whole point is to annoy them by never actually hitting.

[betterthanhim]

*sighs* Would blowing someone's head off make people here take me seriously? I think being an emu might be worth the risk.

[skjam]

I was being serious.

[betterthanhim]

I'm sure you were. And when I start taking advice from a giant green flea, I'll let you know. Until then, let's just assume we're all mature individuals here.