Bocke Fic
Title: Never Told
Fandom: LOST
Characters: John Locke/Ben Linus
Prompt: Table 3 Prompt #4: Kiss
Word Count: 601
Rating: PG-13 (for man-kisses and a wee bit more)
Summary: Alternate version of Ben and John’s goodbye
"I'm sorry I made your life so miserable," Ben laments, still holding out his hand. Within John a storm escalates, the flood barraging him with wreckage from his own battered heart. He wants to forgive Ben for everything. He wants to apologize for doubting him so often. He wants to tell him that every moment they’ve gotten to be together has been worth all of the pain that he has ever felt in his entire life.
John lashes out. Ben stumbles backwards. John catches him easily, bringing their mouths together with the aching passion of uncountable sleepless nights full of heart and headache. He feels Ben stiffen and moan miserably against his lips. He’s pressing his hands hard against John’s chest in an effort to push him away. John flushes with a rush of embarrassment. He lets Ben go. John holds his own arm shyly and his gaze wanders slowly around the dim floor while he avoids Ben’s eyes. He hears Ben swallow thickly. Then there are warm hands on his cheeks, most lips upon on his own and a soft body pressing against him. John’s arms stutter in the space around them until John’s mind finally comprehends what has happened. His hands come to rest lightly upon Ben’s hips. John slowly opens his mouth and Ben sinks right in.
Ben soothes John’s shame with his sure, slow, smooth kiss. John follows along with him easily. Their tongues and lips glide along each other so familiarly. As if every time John has imagined them doing this it had actually happened. Ben tastes better than he ever thought he would. His silky tang fills his mouth, warm and wet. Ben begins to draw his teeth lightly over John’s nerves to send jolts straight through him. John swells. The numb shock that had paralyzed him a moment before has sifted into a serene euphoria. It makes him hot and dizzy. Ben ends the kiss with a lingering tug on John’s lower lip.
They stand together for a few moments, just breathing. “I’m sorry I never told you,” Ben murmurs cautiously. John gulps back a sudden tightness in his throat. “Me too,” he chokes. Ben turns his head toward John’s neck. “You didn’t have to,” he discloses. “I’ve always know what it is that you want, John.” His breath caresses John’s skin making him shiver. Ben gently guides John’s eyes to meet his powerful gaze. John’s chest is tight and he’s having trouble breathing. “Maybe someday you’ll find that you have it.”
Ben places a final fond kiss onto John’s still lips before stepping away. “Goodbye John,” he says softly. “…’bye,” John barely whispers, once again clutching his own arms in a self-embrace. He reluctantly leaves the calming hold of Ben’s cool eyes, then turns and walks briskly toward the elevator because he knows that he won’t be able to watch Ben leave. He senses Ben’s secure stare on his back as he leaves. It nearly makes him whimper.
As John rides the elevator back up, his mind is still sedated even while his heart continues to flicker. He’s swollen and warm where Ben had pressed his body against John’s. There’s a tickle on his neck where Ben spoke to him. He still has his scent in his shirt, his voice in his ear and his taste on his lips. He knows that all of these sensations will fade as he rises farther away from Ben until no proof is left but his memories. What was ever thought and said and felt and done between them, John knows, will never leave either of them.
Fandom: LOST
Characters: John Locke/Ben Linus
Prompt: Table 3 Prompt #4: Kiss
Word Count: 601
Rating: PG-13 (for man-kisses and a wee bit more)
Summary: Alternate version of Ben and John’s goodbye
"I'm sorry I made your life so miserable," Ben laments, still holding out his hand. Within John a storm escalates, the flood barraging him with wreckage from his own battered heart. He wants to forgive Ben for everything. He wants to apologize for doubting him so often. He wants to tell him that every moment they’ve gotten to be together has been worth all of the pain that he has ever felt in his entire life.
John lashes out. Ben stumbles backwards. John catches him easily, bringing their mouths together with the aching passion of uncountable sleepless nights full of heart and headache. He feels Ben stiffen and moan miserably against his lips. He’s pressing his hands hard against John’s chest in an effort to push him away. John flushes with a rush of embarrassment. He lets Ben go. John holds his own arm shyly and his gaze wanders slowly around the dim floor while he avoids Ben’s eyes. He hears Ben swallow thickly. Then there are warm hands on his cheeks, most lips upon on his own and a soft body pressing against him. John’s arms stutter in the space around them until John’s mind finally comprehends what has happened. His hands come to rest lightly upon Ben’s hips. John slowly opens his mouth and Ben sinks right in.
Ben soothes John’s shame with his sure, slow, smooth kiss. John follows along with him easily. Their tongues and lips glide along each other so familiarly. As if every time John has imagined them doing this it had actually happened. Ben tastes better than he ever thought he would. His silky tang fills his mouth, warm and wet. Ben begins to draw his teeth lightly over John’s nerves to send jolts straight through him. John swells. The numb shock that had paralyzed him a moment before has sifted into a serene euphoria. It makes him hot and dizzy. Ben ends the kiss with a lingering tug on John’s lower lip.
They stand together for a few moments, just breathing. “I’m sorry I never told you,” Ben murmurs cautiously. John gulps back a sudden tightness in his throat. “Me too,” he chokes. Ben turns his head toward John’s neck. “You didn’t have to,” he discloses. “I’ve always know what it is that you want, John.” His breath caresses John’s skin making him shiver. Ben gently guides John’s eyes to meet his powerful gaze. John’s chest is tight and he’s having trouble breathing. “Maybe someday you’ll find that you have it.”
Ben places a final fond kiss onto John’s still lips before stepping away. “Goodbye John,” he says softly. “…’bye,” John barely whispers, once again clutching his own arms in a self-embrace. He reluctantly leaves the calming hold of Ben’s cool eyes, then turns and walks briskly toward the elevator because he knows that he won’t be able to watch Ben leave. He senses Ben’s secure stare on his back as he leaves. It nearly makes him whimper.
As John rides the elevator back up, his mind is still sedated even while his heart continues to flicker. He’s swollen and warm where Ben had pressed his body against John’s. There’s a tickle on his neck where Ben spoke to him. He still has his scent in his shirt, his voice in his ear and his taste on his lips. He knows that all of these sensations will fade as he rises farther away from Ben until no proof is left but his memories. What was ever thought and said and felt and done between them, John knows, will never leave either of them.