Walk 7/7: But Still Inside A Whisper To A Riot
Title: Walk
Author: safiyabat
Artist: chasingparallax
Characters & Pairing(s): Sam/Castiel; Sam, Castiel, Claire, Dean
Rating: M
Word Count: 32,417 / 490 (chapter)
Warnings: show-level violence, depression. No warnings for this chapter.
Summary: A decision is made.
Sam slept beside Castiel for the full night. Cas didn’t - he was an angel, he didn’t need sleep - but Sam woke up next to him all the same. “I heard from Claire,” Cas told him. “She texted me several party hat emojis and slept in the other room.”
Sam blushed a deep red. “I see.” He shook his head and rolled over onto his side, so he could look directly at Cas. “Did you stay here the whole night?”
“I did.” Cas smiled a little bit. “I enjoyed holding you.”
Sam chuckled. “I never would have pegged you for a cuddler, Cas.”
“I liked it very much. It provided, as you said, a connection.” He traced the outline of Sam’s jaw with his hand. “What happens now, Sam?”
Sam sighed. “I was wondering the same thing. And kind of hoping to avoid the question at the same time, if that makes any sense.” He sat up and pushed his hair into place. “I mean, if you’ve just… gotten it out of your system or whatever, I guess that’s fine.”
The angel frowned. “Sam, are you saying that because it is what you want or because that’s what you think that I want?”
Sam cleared his throat. “I’m not usually given to casual encounters.”
“That’s what I thought. I want to be with you, Sam. I want to be with you again. And again. And again. For as long as you’ll have me.” A faint spot of red appeared in the angel’s cheeks. “I meant what I said last night, Sam. I love you.”
Sam wrapped his arms around Castiel. Winchesters were iffy with love. They didn’t know how to express it, they didn’t say it, they didn’t even acknowledge it to themselves. Sam, though - he had, he did. He’d loved before, and he’d admitted it to the people involved and to his family. Why should he stop himself now? “I love you too, Cas. I do.” He leaned against the headboard and let the angel rest his head on Sam’s chest. “The question is, where do we go from here? I know you want to get back to Dean. And nothing’s changed, in terms of what I need from Dean.”
“Sam.” Cas sighed. “I care for Dean. In a different way than the way I love you, of course, but I care for him. We are bound, he and I. And so are you. You are soulmates, whatever else has come between you.” He traced the outline of Sam’s abs.
“I know.” Sam sighed. “But I can’t go on like that.”
“So don’t.” Cas looked up at him. “We’ll go on together for a while. You, me and Claire. And when Dean is ready to listen, to cooperate, we’ll reunite.”
It’s not real, it’s not real, it’s not real. Sam ignored the voice. Real or not, his heart felt lighter than it had in a decade. “You mean it?”
“Yes.”
Back to Chapter Six -- On to Masterpost
Author: safiyabat
Artist: chasingparallax
Characters & Pairing(s): Sam/Castiel; Sam, Castiel, Claire, Dean
Rating: M
Word Count: 32,417 / 490 (chapter)
Warnings: show-level violence, depression. No warnings for this chapter.
Summary: A decision is made.
Sam slept beside Castiel for the full night. Cas didn’t - he was an angel, he didn’t need sleep - but Sam woke up next to him all the same. “I heard from Claire,” Cas told him. “She texted me several party hat emojis and slept in the other room.”
Sam blushed a deep red. “I see.” He shook his head and rolled over onto his side, so he could look directly at Cas. “Did you stay here the whole night?”
“I did.” Cas smiled a little bit. “I enjoyed holding you.”
Sam chuckled. “I never would have pegged you for a cuddler, Cas.”
“I liked it very much. It provided, as you said, a connection.” He traced the outline of Sam’s jaw with his hand. “What happens now, Sam?”
Sam sighed. “I was wondering the same thing. And kind of hoping to avoid the question at the same time, if that makes any sense.” He sat up and pushed his hair into place. “I mean, if you’ve just… gotten it out of your system or whatever, I guess that’s fine.”
The angel frowned. “Sam, are you saying that because it is what you want or because that’s what you think that I want?”
Sam cleared his throat. “I’m not usually given to casual encounters.”
“That’s what I thought. I want to be with you, Sam. I want to be with you again. And again. And again. For as long as you’ll have me.” A faint spot of red appeared in the angel’s cheeks. “I meant what I said last night, Sam. I love you.”
Sam wrapped his arms around Castiel. Winchesters were iffy with love. They didn’t know how to express it, they didn’t say it, they didn’t even acknowledge it to themselves. Sam, though - he had, he did. He’d loved before, and he’d admitted it to the people involved and to his family. Why should he stop himself now? “I love you too, Cas. I do.” He leaned against the headboard and let the angel rest his head on Sam’s chest. “The question is, where do we go from here? I know you want to get back to Dean. And nothing’s changed, in terms of what I need from Dean.”
“Sam.” Cas sighed. “I care for Dean. In a different way than the way I love you, of course, but I care for him. We are bound, he and I. And so are you. You are soulmates, whatever else has come between you.” He traced the outline of Sam’s abs.
“I know.” Sam sighed. “But I can’t go on like that.”
“So don’t.” Cas looked up at him. “We’ll go on together for a while. You, me and Claire. And when Dean is ready to listen, to cooperate, we’ll reunite.”
It’s not real, it’s not real, it’s not real. Sam ignored the voice. Real or not, his heart felt lighter than it had in a decade. “You mean it?”
“Yes.”
Back to Chapter Six -- On to Masterpost