x007|
Maxwell could not quite place what it was that seemed off about this situation. Maybe it was the fact that he was in a bathroom when just a moment ago he could have sworn he had been walking outside. Maybe it was that muscular man standing in the middle of the bathroom with just his bath towel on, leering at him. Or maybe, just maybe, it was the fact that the toilet seat had been left up. Yeah, it must have been that. Maxwell tsk tsked at it and--
There was a muscular man standing in the middle of the bathroom leering at him.
Maxwell blinked.
"Don't you wish you could look like me, Man?"
"Well--"
"But you can't."
Maxwell blinked again. "Oka-"
"But you could smell like me."
Maxwell was not sure he wanted to smell like this leering man. The man sensed this and beckoned the scientist closer. Maxwell's legs moved on their own, and he tentatively sniffed the man's chest. "Well I guess you do smell rather nice."
"You'll just have to get rid of your ladies' scented body wash," the man continued as he whipped out a very pink bottle that Maxwell was certain was not his.
"That's not mi--"
"Where are you."
Stare. "I'm in the bathr--"
"You're on a boat with the man that you could possibly smell like."
Golly he really was on a boat! Maxwell stared around himself, and noticed that the walls of the bathroom were flying through the sky on some sort of dolly. Were they doing this all in one take?? That was pretty amazing but whoa suddenly a hand was shoved in front of his face.
"What's in my hand?"
Maxwell looked down at it. There was nothing in this ridiculously handsome man's hand. Maxwell frowned a little and and looked back up at the guy. "Uhhh… Nothing?"
"Look again."
A second glance revealed a telephone sitting in the man's open palm. Maxwell glanced back up at the man, confused. The phone rang. THe man pushed it closer to him.
"It's for you."
Huh. Well alright. Maxwell nodded and picked up the receiver, cradling it against his ear. "Uh… Hello?"
"Maxwell," came a deep voice across the line.
"Uh, yes, this is him speaking."
"You've forgotten me so easily." Maxwell's brow furrowed, unable to place a face to the voice. Odd. It sounded a bit familiar but… He had no idea. The only clue he had was that his voice was covered in a thick accent that sounded much like his own.
Wait.
"…. Dad?"
"Can't even remember the sound of your old man's voice. Son, I am disappoint."
Click.
Maxwell stared at the receiver in his hand, the buzz of the dial tone burning in his ears. He glanced up at the muscular man again, who was now on a brilliantly white horse. "I'm on a horse," he stated rather obviously. Maxwell nodded. "The rest is up to you. HYAH~!" He rode straight into the lake, vanishing into the ball of fire that was the reflection of the sun.
The phone rang again. It was sitting on a pedestal now. Maxwell picked up the phone.
"Maxie, hey!" Quipped a little british voice. Maxwell smiled. Oh good, it was Jeff.
"Jeff, goodness, hell-"
"You're really not all that smart, are you? You're a pretty useless guy. I'm swimming in royalties from the Bad Key Machine… Yeah, I put a patent on it. Cool stuff, huh? I made it better though. Oh, Dad and I are going into space now. We made up and get along fabulously. Can't even remember why I ever wanted you as a friend, haha! Oh, we're taking Tony too. … Oh hey, can you make a record of this?"
Maxwell felt a little numb, but he nodded his head. "Oh, ah, yeah," he replied quietly.
"Oh good! This way you can always start up from this point and you can't even think about forgetting this ever happened! Haha! See ya!"
Click. Maxwell set the receiver down and stared at it for a moment.
The phone rang again. Maxwell picked it up and a flurry of moths came pouring out of it as he held it to his ear.
"Oh Maxwell!" Came Tony's voice from amongst the sound of tiny beating wings. "Don't listen to a word Jeff said! That was positively awful! I don't know what's got in to him!"
"Ha, ha, don't worry about it. I'm sure it must have been one of those crazy things that happens at--"
"It was positively awful of him to sugar coat it like that, don't you think? We really don't want anything to do with you. I don't know why he would go and ask you to record that! Now we'll never get rid of you! Just leave us alone, okay?"
Click.
The phone was ringing again before he could even set it down. Maxwell pressed the button.
"Tee hee hee! I took Gauss! He wanted to let you know that he's tired of having such a loser for an owner! He'd much rather help me out with destroying everything tee hee hee! Hey maybe you should come over. I'd love to see your face when I crush everything you hold dear."
Click. He set it down. It rang again.
"…Mooooooooooooo."
Maxwell blinked and stared down at the receiver. "B-Beatrice?"
"Mooooooooooooo."
Click.
Ring ring.
Click.
Ring ring.
Click.
Ring ring.
Click.
Ring ring ring. Click. Ring ring ring ring.. Click. Ring ring ring ring ring. Click. Ring ring ring ring ring ring. Click. Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring. Click. Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring ring. Click. Ring ring ring. Click. Ring ring ring ring. Click. Ring ring ring ring ring. Click. Ring ring ring. Click. Ring ring ring. Click. Ring ring ring ring ring ring. Click. Ring ring ring. Click. Ring ring ring. Click.
Ring.
Maxwell picked up the phone. "…Hello?"
"Banana phone…!"
[Despite the fact that Maxwell has not moved in inch in his make believe world, he is actually moving around quite a bit. Every once in a while he stops and picks up a random object (which probably included Tony's hat right off of his head) and talks to it. How strange.]