The Sword of Truthiness saga continues
What do you do if you're a poor, psychopathic leader of an empire, and you need allies countries that will agree to give up their national sovereignty to you for your fight against this OTHER psychopathic leader of an empire, but certain people just don't want to be your ally cannon fodder?
Well, if you're Kahlan, the main heroine of the Sword of Truth series, you swear to raze the stubborn country to the ground and have your half-sister the queen gang raped.
^_^
What do you mean, it doesn't make sense? IT IS THE ONLY LOGICAL ANSWER, AND BECAUSE IT IS LOGICAL, YOU MUST DO IT. And stuff.
“Queen Cyrilla refused my plan to take our troops south. Shortly after you were there and visited her, she came out of her illness. She was herself again - full of ambition and fire. You know what she was like. She was always tireless in her advocacy for Galea.” His fingers idly tapped the table. “But I’m afraid she has been changed by her infirmity. She fears the Imperial Order.”
“So do I,” Kahlan said with quiet bottled rage. She could feel Richard’s sword pressed against the back of her shoulder. She saw Harold’s eyes take it in. “Everyone in the Midlands fears the Order. That is why we need those troops.”
He was nodding as she spoke. “I told her all that. I did. She said that she is Queen of Galea, and as such, she must put our land first.”
“Galea has joined the D’Haran Empire!”
He opened his hands in a helpless gesture. “When she was ill, she was…unaware of that event taking place. She said she only gave you the crown for the safekeeping of her people, not to surrender their sovereignty.” His hands dropped to his sides. “She claims you never had any such authority and refuses to abide by the agreement.”
[...]
I'm not very surprised, frankly. What would YOU do if YOU found out that while you were in the hospital, recuperating from a bad case of gang-rape induced insanity (The Order's been through Galea before), the person you asked to watch your house for you had sold it... to themselves? It sure doesn't sound like Kahlan did anything like, oh, say, asking first...
“What about Jebra?” Zedd asked from the side of the room. Kahlan was relieved to hear his voice, as if reason were returning to the lunacy of what she was hearing, as if the weight of another voice would set things straight. “We left the seer there to help care for Cyrilla and to advise you. Surely, Jebra must have advised Cyrilla against such actions.”
Harold hung his head again. “I’m afraid that Queen Cyrilla ordered Jebra thrown into a dungeon. Moreover, the queen gave orders that if Jebra speaks one word of her blasphemy-as Queen Cyrilla calls it-she is to have her tongue cut out.”
Something you might notice pretty quickly is that every time someone with an philosophy opposing the protagonists appears in SoT, they always turn out to be complete douches. This is probably to make sure that the audience won't wind up sympathizing with them. It's very cheap, and doesn't do Goodkind's philosophy any justice.
[...]
“Mother Confessor, I have been charged by my queen with protecting the people of Galea. I know my duty.”
“Duty?” Kahlan wiped a hand across her face. “Harold, you can’t blindly follow that woman’s whim. The route to life and liberty exists only through reason. She may be queen, but reason can be your only true sovereign. To fail to use reason in this, to fail to think, is intellectual anarchy.”
As The Mad Moose said, nice job quoting Richard there about the necessity of thinking for yourself.
Also, when has Kahlan actually showed us that her way is the only logical way? D'Hara's war tactics are immoral and impractical, and why on god's green earth does Galea have to become a part of the D'Haran empire in order to help fight the Order? Why can't a coalition be formed, like the ones that were created to fight Napoleon? Richard's insistence that he become the ruler of all the countries in the Midlands comes off as more power-hungry than anything else.
[...]
“Harold, Galea is part of the D’Haran Empire. Galea has a queen only at the indulgence of the Empire. Queen though she may be, even if she does not recognize the rule of the D’Haran Empire, she is still, as she always has been, subordinate to the Mother Confessor of the Midlands. As Mother Confessor, as well as the leader of the D’Haran Empire in Lord Rahl’s absence, I formally terminate that indulgence. Cyrilla is now without authority and is removed from office. She is no longer the queen of anything, much less Galea.
The office of Mother Confessor = Plot device Terry Goodkind uses to pull himself out of any potential situation where his protagonists might have to take part in real political negotiations, instead of the hackneyed "You do what I say, and I kill you if you don't" tactic they seem to prefer.
“You are ordered to return to Ebinissia, to put Cyrilla under arrest for her own protection, to release Jebra, and to return to this army with the seer and all Galean forces except a home guard for the crown city.”
“Mother Confessor, I’m sorry, but my queen has ordered-"
Kahlan slammed the flat of her hand down on the table. “Enough!”
He fell silent as Kahlan rose. With her fingertips pressed to the table, she leaned closer to him.
“As Mother Confessor, I am commanding you to carry out my orders at once. That is final. I will hear no more.”
The room seemed gripped by the grave consequence of what was happening. Each forbidding face watched, waiting to see how it was going to go.
Harold spoke in a voice that reminded Kahlan of their father’s.
“I realize that it may make no sense to you, Mother Confessor, but I must choose my duty to my people above my duty to you. Cyrilla is my sister. King Wyborn always told me to run a good army. An officer must obey his queen. My men down here are ordered by their queen to return at once to protect Galea. I am a man bound by my honor to protect my people, as ordered by my queen.”
“You pompous fool. How dare you speak to me of your honor? You are sacrificing the lives of innocent people to your delusions of honor. Honor is honesty to what is, not blind duty to what you wish to be. You have no honor, Harold."
No, how dare YOU speak of honor, and how dare YOU speak of sacrificing innocent lives. You sacrificed any right you had to lecture other people in those areas when you decided that your primary tactic for winning this war would be the indiscriminate slaughter of innocents. In about a minute, you'll put the lie to any claims to honor and righteousness you had by swearing to kill everyone who refuses to surrender their country to you, regardless of whether or not they had any choice in that decision, and by swearing to have someone gang-raped for their part in that decision.
[...]
His face had aged and hardened. “I know that you are not responsible for all that happened before you came to be, and I will always love that part of you that is my father, but I am still the one who must live with it all. Now I must be true to myself, to my own feeling.”
Note: Confessor children are pretty much conceived through rape. Confessors have the innate power to, through touch, force any given person to love them so much they'll do anything (Literally; Kahlan once touched someone with her power and then told them she wanted them to die, and they fell down dead the same instant) for the Confessor that touched them. This isn't consensual, and it's explicitly stated that men try to avoid Confessors who are of marrying age. (There are no male Confessors, because any male child with that power is strangled at birth.)
Kahlan's mother used this power on Kahlan's father, who also happened to be the father of both Harold and Cyrilla, and the ruler of Galea. Admittedly, Kahlan feels bad about this, but she seems to believe it's justified because she feels that Confessors need to procreate, but none of them will be able to hold back their power when they orgasm. There are some obvious problems with this. First of all, since when did having sex necessitate having an orgasm? I don't see what's preventing the Confessor from just taking steps to make sure they don't. This seems so obvious, I kinda have to wonder if Goodkind's ever actually... you know... done it. Second, Confessor power takes a while to recharge after it's used. Why don't the Confessors just do their procreating while their power is still recharging and the guy won't be in any danger? Third, c'mon, don't tell me they've never heard of the turkey baster method in the SoT universe!
“Your feelings,” she repeated.
“Yes, Mother Confessor. Those are my feelings, and I must put my faith in them.”
Kahlan swallowed past the painful constriction in her throat. Her fingers, lying limply on the table before her, tingled.
“Faith and feelings. Harold, you are as mad as your sister.”
She drew herself up straight and folded her hands. She shared a last look with her half brother, a man she had never known, except in name, as she pronounced sentence on him.
“Beginning at sunrise tomorrow, the D’Haran Empire and Galea are at war. After sunrise tomorrow, if you are seen by me or any of our men, you will be put to death for the crime of treason.
“I will not allow those brave men out there to die for traitors. The Imperial Order will, in all likelihood, turn north up the Callisidrin valley. You will be alone. They will butcher every man in your army, just as they butchered the people of Ebinissia. Jagang will give your sister to his men, as a whore.
“It will be by your doing, Harold, for refusing to use your ability to think, and instead following your feelings and faith in what does not exist.”
Harold, hands clasped behind his back, chin held up, said nothing as Kahlan continued.
“Tell Cyrilla that she had better hope for the fate I have just described, because if the Order does not come through Galea, I will. I have promised no mercy to the Order. Galea’s treason condemns her to the same fate as the Order. If the Order does not get Cyrilla, than I swear I will, and when I get her, I am going to take her back to Aydindril and I’m going to personally throw her back down into that pit from which you rescued her, and I am going to leave her down there with every criminal brute I can find for as long as she lives.’
...Yeah.
Remember, guys, these are the HEROES, and in this case, they're also Goodkind's mouthpieces. This is not a case of the author disagreeing with their characters, no no. He totally believes this stuff. And you know what's even more unnerving? The fact that these books are bestsellers.
By the way, in case you were wondering whether or not the heroes really were planning to outright massacre civilians in that first SoT post... Kahlan just outright said what she plans for Galea is the same as what she plans for the Order. So, yeah, I'd say imminent massacres are a given.
Harold’s jaw dropped. “Mother Confessor…you wouldn’t.”
Kahlan’s eyes told him otherwise. “You be sure to tell Cyrilla what’s in store for her. Jebra probably tried to tell her, and was thrown in a dungeon for it. Cyrilla is refusing to see the open pit before her, and you are walking into it with her. Worse, you are taking your innocent people with you.”
Kahlan drew her royal Galean sword. She grasped either end in a hand. Gritting her teeth, she pulled the flat of the blade against her knew. The steel bent, then finally snapped with a loud report. She tossed the broken blade on the floor at his feet.
How strong would Kahlan have to be to snap a sword, do you think?
I suppose Goodkind would explain it as her "thing" rising inside of her...
“Now get out of my sight.”
He turned to leave, but before he took a step, Zedd stood, holding out a hand as if to ask him to remain where he was.
“Mother Confessor,” Zedd said, choosing his words carefully. “I believe you are letting your emotions get in the way.’
Harold gestured to Kahlan, relieved to hear Zedd’s intercession. “Tell her, Wizard Zorander. Tell her.”
Kahlan couldn’t believe her ears. She remained where she was, staring into Zedd’s hazel eyes. “Then would you mind explaining my error of emotion, First Wizard?”
Zedd glanced at Harold and then back to Kahlan. “Mother Confessor, Queen Cyrilla is obviously deranged.
Don't you just love the audacity of these people? "Oh, they're not doing what we tell them to, they must be insane." I also love how Kahlan apparently believes that her sister's crazy, but is perfectly willing to pass her sentence anyway.
Prince Harold is not only doing her a disservice, but enabling her to bring only the specter of death to her people. If he chose the side of reason, he would be protecting his people, and honoring his sister’s past admirable service when she was of sound mind.
“Instead, he has betrayed his duty to his people by embracing what he wishes to be true about her instead of facing what is true. In this way, he is embracing death, and in this case, embracing death for his people, too.
“Prince Harold has been justly found guilty of treason. Your emotions for him are interfering with your judgment. Obviously, he is now a danger to our cause, to the lives of our people, and to the lives of his own people. He cannot be allowed to leave.”
Yeah, I'm sure a great staple of diplomatic negotiations is killing the representatives when they won't do what you want. AHEM.
Harold looked thunderstruck. “But Zedd…”
Zedd’s hazel eyes, too, were a terrible pronouncement of guilt. He waited, as if challenging the man to further prove his treason. Harold’s mouth moved, but he could offer no words.
“Does anyone disagree with me?” Zedd asked.
He looked at Adie. She shook her head. Verna likewise shook her head. Warren stared at Harold for a moment, then shook his head.
Harold’s expression turned indignant. “I’m not going to stand for this. The Mother Confessor has given me until dawn to withdraw. You must honor her sentence.”
I really wish he had the ability to back himself up here. Somebody's got to put some checks on Richard and Kahlan, stat. They're practically the poster children for why there should be checks and balances in the government.
He took two strides toward the door, gut then paused, clutching his chest. Twisting slowly as he started to sink, his eyes rolling up in his head. His legs folded and he crashed to the floor.
Kahlan sat stunned. No one moved or said anything. General Meiffert went down on one knee beside the body, checking Prince Harold for breath or pulse. The general looked up at Kahlan and shook his head.
She passed her gaze from Zedd, to Adie, to Verna, to Warren. None revealed anything in their expression.
Kahlan stood and spoke softly. “I don’t ever want to know which one of you did this. I’m not saying you were wrong…I just don’t want to know.”
~Terry Goodkind, Faith of the Fallen
Faith of the Fallen was actually the book that made me give up on the SoT series. I think I quit reading it before I got to this part, and that's probably a good thing, because I might have thrown the book across the room and then it would've gotten me less money at Bookman's.
Well, if you're Kahlan, the main heroine of the Sword of Truth series, you swear to raze the stubborn country to the ground and have your half-sister the queen gang raped.
^_^
What do you mean, it doesn't make sense? IT IS THE ONLY LOGICAL ANSWER, AND BECAUSE IT IS LOGICAL, YOU MUST DO IT. And stuff.
“Queen Cyrilla refused my plan to take our troops south. Shortly after you were there and visited her, she came out of her illness. She was herself again - full of ambition and fire. You know what she was like. She was always tireless in her advocacy for Galea.” His fingers idly tapped the table. “But I’m afraid she has been changed by her infirmity. She fears the Imperial Order.”
“So do I,” Kahlan said with quiet bottled rage. She could feel Richard’s sword pressed against the back of her shoulder. She saw Harold’s eyes take it in. “Everyone in the Midlands fears the Order. That is why we need those troops.”
He was nodding as she spoke. “I told her all that. I did. She said that she is Queen of Galea, and as such, she must put our land first.”
“Galea has joined the D’Haran Empire!”
He opened his hands in a helpless gesture. “When she was ill, she was…unaware of that event taking place. She said she only gave you the crown for the safekeeping of her people, not to surrender their sovereignty.” His hands dropped to his sides. “She claims you never had any such authority and refuses to abide by the agreement.”
[...]
I'm not very surprised, frankly. What would YOU do if YOU found out that while you were in the hospital, recuperating from a bad case of gang-rape induced insanity (The Order's been through Galea before), the person you asked to watch your house for you had sold it... to themselves? It sure doesn't sound like Kahlan did anything like, oh, say, asking first...
“What about Jebra?” Zedd asked from the side of the room. Kahlan was relieved to hear his voice, as if reason were returning to the lunacy of what she was hearing, as if the weight of another voice would set things straight. “We left the seer there to help care for Cyrilla and to advise you. Surely, Jebra must have advised Cyrilla against such actions.”
Harold hung his head again. “I’m afraid that Queen Cyrilla ordered Jebra thrown into a dungeon. Moreover, the queen gave orders that if Jebra speaks one word of her blasphemy-as Queen Cyrilla calls it-she is to have her tongue cut out.”
Something you might notice pretty quickly is that every time someone with an philosophy opposing the protagonists appears in SoT, they always turn out to be complete douches. This is probably to make sure that the audience won't wind up sympathizing with them. It's very cheap, and doesn't do Goodkind's philosophy any justice.
[...]
“Mother Confessor, I have been charged by my queen with protecting the people of Galea. I know my duty.”
“Duty?” Kahlan wiped a hand across her face. “Harold, you can’t blindly follow that woman’s whim. The route to life and liberty exists only through reason. She may be queen, but reason can be your only true sovereign. To fail to use reason in this, to fail to think, is intellectual anarchy.”
As The Mad Moose said, nice job quoting Richard there about the necessity of thinking for yourself.
Also, when has Kahlan actually showed us that her way is the only logical way? D'Hara's war tactics are immoral and impractical, and why on god's green earth does Galea have to become a part of the D'Haran empire in order to help fight the Order? Why can't a coalition be formed, like the ones that were created to fight Napoleon? Richard's insistence that he become the ruler of all the countries in the Midlands comes off as more power-hungry than anything else.
[...]
“Harold, Galea is part of the D’Haran Empire. Galea has a queen only at the indulgence of the Empire. Queen though she may be, even if she does not recognize the rule of the D’Haran Empire, she is still, as she always has been, subordinate to the Mother Confessor of the Midlands. As Mother Confessor, as well as the leader of the D’Haran Empire in Lord Rahl’s absence, I formally terminate that indulgence. Cyrilla is now without authority and is removed from office. She is no longer the queen of anything, much less Galea.
The office of Mother Confessor = Plot device Terry Goodkind uses to pull himself out of any potential situation where his protagonists might have to take part in real political negotiations, instead of the hackneyed "You do what I say, and I kill you if you don't" tactic they seem to prefer.
“You are ordered to return to Ebinissia, to put Cyrilla under arrest for her own protection, to release Jebra, and to return to this army with the seer and all Galean forces except a home guard for the crown city.”
“Mother Confessor, I’m sorry, but my queen has ordered-"
Kahlan slammed the flat of her hand down on the table. “Enough!”
He fell silent as Kahlan rose. With her fingertips pressed to the table, she leaned closer to him.
“As Mother Confessor, I am commanding you to carry out my orders at once. That is final. I will hear no more.”
The room seemed gripped by the grave consequence of what was happening. Each forbidding face watched, waiting to see how it was going to go.
Harold spoke in a voice that reminded Kahlan of their father’s.
“I realize that it may make no sense to you, Mother Confessor, but I must choose my duty to my people above my duty to you. Cyrilla is my sister. King Wyborn always told me to run a good army. An officer must obey his queen. My men down here are ordered by their queen to return at once to protect Galea. I am a man bound by my honor to protect my people, as ordered by my queen.”
“You pompous fool. How dare you speak to me of your honor? You are sacrificing the lives of innocent people to your delusions of honor. Honor is honesty to what is, not blind duty to what you wish to be. You have no honor, Harold."
No, how dare YOU speak of honor, and how dare YOU speak of sacrificing innocent lives. You sacrificed any right you had to lecture other people in those areas when you decided that your primary tactic for winning this war would be the indiscriminate slaughter of innocents. In about a minute, you'll put the lie to any claims to honor and righteousness you had by swearing to kill everyone who refuses to surrender their country to you, regardless of whether or not they had any choice in that decision, and by swearing to have someone gang-raped for their part in that decision.
[...]
His face had aged and hardened. “I know that you are not responsible for all that happened before you came to be, and I will always love that part of you that is my father, but I am still the one who must live with it all. Now I must be true to myself, to my own feeling.”
Note: Confessor children are pretty much conceived through rape. Confessors have the innate power to, through touch, force any given person to love them so much they'll do anything (Literally; Kahlan once touched someone with her power and then told them she wanted them to die, and they fell down dead the same instant) for the Confessor that touched them. This isn't consensual, and it's explicitly stated that men try to avoid Confessors who are of marrying age. (There are no male Confessors, because any male child with that power is strangled at birth.)
Kahlan's mother used this power on Kahlan's father, who also happened to be the father of both Harold and Cyrilla, and the ruler of Galea. Admittedly, Kahlan feels bad about this, but she seems to believe it's justified because she feels that Confessors need to procreate, but none of them will be able to hold back their power when they orgasm. There are some obvious problems with this. First of all, since when did having sex necessitate having an orgasm? I don't see what's preventing the Confessor from just taking steps to make sure they don't. This seems so obvious, I kinda have to wonder if Goodkind's ever actually... you know... done it. Second, Confessor power takes a while to recharge after it's used. Why don't the Confessors just do their procreating while their power is still recharging and the guy won't be in any danger? Third, c'mon, don't tell me they've never heard of the turkey baster method in the SoT universe!
“Your feelings,” she repeated.
“Yes, Mother Confessor. Those are my feelings, and I must put my faith in them.”
Kahlan swallowed past the painful constriction in her throat. Her fingers, lying limply on the table before her, tingled.
“Faith and feelings. Harold, you are as mad as your sister.”
She drew herself up straight and folded her hands. She shared a last look with her half brother, a man she had never known, except in name, as she pronounced sentence on him.
“Beginning at sunrise tomorrow, the D’Haran Empire and Galea are at war. After sunrise tomorrow, if you are seen by me or any of our men, you will be put to death for the crime of treason.
“I will not allow those brave men out there to die for traitors. The Imperial Order will, in all likelihood, turn north up the Callisidrin valley. You will be alone. They will butcher every man in your army, just as they butchered the people of Ebinissia. Jagang will give your sister to his men, as a whore.
“It will be by your doing, Harold, for refusing to use your ability to think, and instead following your feelings and faith in what does not exist.”
Harold, hands clasped behind his back, chin held up, said nothing as Kahlan continued.
“Tell Cyrilla that she had better hope for the fate I have just described, because if the Order does not come through Galea, I will. I have promised no mercy to the Order. Galea’s treason condemns her to the same fate as the Order. If the Order does not get Cyrilla, than I swear I will, and when I get her, I am going to take her back to Aydindril and I’m going to personally throw her back down into that pit from which you rescued her, and I am going to leave her down there with every criminal brute I can find for as long as she lives.’
...Yeah.
Remember, guys, these are the HEROES, and in this case, they're also Goodkind's mouthpieces. This is not a case of the author disagreeing with their characters, no no. He totally believes this stuff. And you know what's even more unnerving? The fact that these books are bestsellers.
By the way, in case you were wondering whether or not the heroes really were planning to outright massacre civilians in that first SoT post... Kahlan just outright said what she plans for Galea is the same as what she plans for the Order. So, yeah, I'd say imminent massacres are a given.
Harold’s jaw dropped. “Mother Confessor…you wouldn’t.”
Kahlan’s eyes told him otherwise. “You be sure to tell Cyrilla what’s in store for her. Jebra probably tried to tell her, and was thrown in a dungeon for it. Cyrilla is refusing to see the open pit before her, and you are walking into it with her. Worse, you are taking your innocent people with you.”
Kahlan drew her royal Galean sword. She grasped either end in a hand. Gritting her teeth, she pulled the flat of the blade against her knew. The steel bent, then finally snapped with a loud report. She tossed the broken blade on the floor at his feet.
How strong would Kahlan have to be to snap a sword, do you think?
I suppose Goodkind would explain it as her "thing" rising inside of her...
“Now get out of my sight.”
He turned to leave, but before he took a step, Zedd stood, holding out a hand as if to ask him to remain where he was.
“Mother Confessor,” Zedd said, choosing his words carefully. “I believe you are letting your emotions get in the way.’
Harold gestured to Kahlan, relieved to hear Zedd’s intercession. “Tell her, Wizard Zorander. Tell her.”
Kahlan couldn’t believe her ears. She remained where she was, staring into Zedd’s hazel eyes. “Then would you mind explaining my error of emotion, First Wizard?”
Zedd glanced at Harold and then back to Kahlan. “Mother Confessor, Queen Cyrilla is obviously deranged.
Don't you just love the audacity of these people? "Oh, they're not doing what we tell them to, they must be insane." I also love how Kahlan apparently believes that her sister's crazy, but is perfectly willing to pass her sentence anyway.
Prince Harold is not only doing her a disservice, but enabling her to bring only the specter of death to her people. If he chose the side of reason, he would be protecting his people, and honoring his sister’s past admirable service when she was of sound mind.
“Instead, he has betrayed his duty to his people by embracing what he wishes to be true about her instead of facing what is true. In this way, he is embracing death, and in this case, embracing death for his people, too.
“Prince Harold has been justly found guilty of treason. Your emotions for him are interfering with your judgment. Obviously, he is now a danger to our cause, to the lives of our people, and to the lives of his own people. He cannot be allowed to leave.”
Yeah, I'm sure a great staple of diplomatic negotiations is killing the representatives when they won't do what you want. AHEM.
Harold looked thunderstruck. “But Zedd…”
Zedd’s hazel eyes, too, were a terrible pronouncement of guilt. He waited, as if challenging the man to further prove his treason. Harold’s mouth moved, but he could offer no words.
“Does anyone disagree with me?” Zedd asked.
He looked at Adie. She shook her head. Verna likewise shook her head. Warren stared at Harold for a moment, then shook his head.
Harold’s expression turned indignant. “I’m not going to stand for this. The Mother Confessor has given me until dawn to withdraw. You must honor her sentence.”
I really wish he had the ability to back himself up here. Somebody's got to put some checks on Richard and Kahlan, stat. They're practically the poster children for why there should be checks and balances in the government.
He took two strides toward the door, gut then paused, clutching his chest. Twisting slowly as he started to sink, his eyes rolling up in his head. His legs folded and he crashed to the floor.
Kahlan sat stunned. No one moved or said anything. General Meiffert went down on one knee beside the body, checking Prince Harold for breath or pulse. The general looked up at Kahlan and shook his head.
She passed her gaze from Zedd, to Adie, to Verna, to Warren. None revealed anything in their expression.
Kahlan stood and spoke softly. “I don’t ever want to know which one of you did this. I’m not saying you were wrong…I just don’t want to know.”
~Terry Goodkind, Faith of the Fallen
Faith of the Fallen was actually the book that made me give up on the SoT series. I think I quit reading it before I got to this part, and that's probably a good thing, because I might have thrown the book across the room and then it would've gotten me less money at Bookman's.