ADD?
ugggh things are still bad. marching band still exists, so it's bad. lately i have been sleeping sooooo much. it's affecting my grades just a bit because pretty much every moment i'm not at school/some sort of rehearsal, i sleep. i really want to say screw school and forget about it all. it all seems so irrelevant, it's no where near what i'm interested in studying/pursuing in life. i still am not able to practice. AAAAAHHHH. i neeeeeed to practice. i want to get into IAA so desperatley, if i don't i probably wont go to madison next year. i'll probably homeschool so i can cut the bs and just practice most of the day. that's what i wish i was doing right now. i'm actually considering it now, my sister did it so why shouldn't i be able to? i know band is a good experience to play in an ensemble, but really being forced to do marching band is almost too much for me. i hate it more than anything else. if i practiced enough and stayed in AYSO, then i think i should be doing pretty well, maybe i'll join levine band for a little extra ensemble time.
all i know is that the shape i'm in now is not at all on track for where i need to be if i expect to get into IAA. Mr Ricobonno told me before i left camp that i should be practicing 4-6 hours a day. ummmm psht i'm lucky if i get in one.granted, 4-6 sounds reaaaallly excessive. and if it's not clear yet, I HATE SCHOOL SOOOO MUCH. i hate most of the people there. they are disrespectful. i hate that i feel like i need to put up a front because being a musician isn't cool. screw that, i LOVE it. i hate band but i love playing trombone, and i just want to dedicate myself to that entirely. my mom really doesn't understand, she gives me so much bs about how schoolwork comes first. psht, that wont mean anything when i'm applying to conservatories next year. of course at my rate i won't stand any chance at a conservatory.
so this is my dilemma. i could bag it all (school) and let my grades drop but also get tons of awesome practice/improvement on trombone. or i could study really hard and get a solid gpa/sat score but stand no chance at all of getting into a good music school and doing what i LOVE. :/
all i know is that the shape i'm in now is not at all on track for where i need to be if i expect to get into IAA. Mr Ricobonno told me before i left camp that i should be practicing 4-6 hours a day. ummmm psht i'm lucky if i get in one.granted, 4-6 sounds reaaaallly excessive. and if it's not clear yet, I HATE SCHOOL SOOOO MUCH. i hate most of the people there. they are disrespectful. i hate that i feel like i need to put up a front because being a musician isn't cool. screw that, i LOVE it. i hate band but i love playing trombone, and i just want to dedicate myself to that entirely. my mom really doesn't understand, she gives me so much bs about how schoolwork comes first. psht, that wont mean anything when i'm applying to conservatories next year. of course at my rate i won't stand any chance at a conservatory.
so this is my dilemma. i could bag it all (school) and let my grades drop but also get tons of awesome practice/improvement on trombone. or i could study really hard and get a solid gpa/sat score but stand no chance at all of getting into a good music school and doing what i LOVE. :/