yeah....
i think i might have started my period... i hope so :) i have been bloated and had bad cramps lately... i hope its my period but i could have been torn a little from rough sex earlier... oh well. i am watching mono lisa smile. its a good movie. i can't wait until i am pretty. i guess its really stupid but i think everything in my life will be amazing when i am thin. whenever anything bad happens i just don't think about it and focus my negative energy on how fat i am, that way i dont have any other problems other than being fat... and being fat sucks but its better to think about than my other problems. oh well. maybe it will all be better. its nice to have somethig to focus on, now i am not worryiong about my relationship or dying or the meaning of life or anything bad except for being fat. its nice-ish.